little ms. "sweet and innocent."
Now without pictures because Tripod has started to be jerks about it.
Friday, May 24, 2002
And you thought stealing their title would do what, exactly?
Once upon a time there was this small town big wig who was head of the water board. The water in the town was nasty brown sludgeola, and the newspaper kept writing stories about it that pissed the bigwig off. So the bigwig thinks he can screw them over by buying up their title when the paperwork lapses (those in charge had a death in the family) and then of course, taking it to court. They're still managing to publish anyway. Hah!
Friday, May 24, 2002
Buffy spoilage from one of the writers.
Interesting...
Please, please, please let this fall through. I may puke. I may quit the show. I don't think I can stand 6 episodes of dumb teenage evil bimbo again. We already lived through Glory, thankyouverymuch.
Friday, May 24, 2002
The sacramental stud who married me and baptized my children
Creepy article about a woman finding out that a priest that had been there for important moments in her life (even if she didn't like him much) was a child molester. Really creepy that this guy called himself a "sacramental stud" and wanted to be taken out to lunch and wrote them letters, too.
The part that weirds me out is where the question of can she get the kids rebaptized and no, it still counts. Ugggh. Yet another reason why I really don't like that I got baptized Catholic.
Friday, May 24, 2002
So... how did you two meet?
I'm tempted to try out "He was sworn to me in the ancient prophesies" or "When our eyes met, across the room, the sounds of the psych ward suddenly faded into the background..." this weekend around my nosy-ass relatives.
Friday, May 24, 2002
Synopses of Mentos commercials
I love the snarky tone of these: "A young woman finds herself in a bit of a pinch, as she discovers that she has packed too much, and her bags are a most bothersome burden. But she has no fear, it is a burden which is not insurmountable, especially with Mentos on her side. She unsheathes her glimmering blue tube of freshness, and holds it out stretched like the mighty Excalibur, and although shortening it by 1/14 this weapon has not lost its power. She consumes the pellet of perkiness, and decrees that she and only she shall be the one to ride the baggage cart, and all the other most unfresh patrons of the airport shall bear the full weight of their baggage." Gotta love that tone, even if you don't much like the commericals.
I've never seen the remote-controlled boat ad before, but it (dare I say it) actually sounds cool? A bitch and a half to pull off IRL, but cool.
There's also the Mentos FAQ and fun stuff like FreshSpeak.
Friday, May 24, 2002
Sharon Osbourne once peed in a suitcase
Man, that girl may just pee in anything...
Tuesday, May 21, 2002
Fun, weird Star Wars links, 'cause I'm a geek like that.
The above link has some amusing Ebert/Roeper arguing. The Yoda stuff is especially giggle-worthy.
Episode 1: Worst. Sequel. Ever. So not a surprise.
In defense of the Empire.
Other er, Star Wars characters.
I'm not surprised to see Leia as a ho after that bikini outfit, but Lando in a pink pimp coat?! Damn.
Hidden things in AOTC, including multiple Millennium Falcons and odd cowish Naboo animals floating around in asteroids and on fire in battle. I didn't notice the latter when seeing it and now wish I had.
Tuesday, May 21, 2002
The Wal-Mart wedding
Boy, does this seem freaky to me.
Married in the cheese department?
Tuesday, May 21, 2002
Puff Daddy wants Brad Pitt to play him in the movie of his life.
I don't make this shit up, folks.
Tuesday, May 21, 2002
Women's sizes mean nothing
I so wish they had some kind of standards for this. I'm about the same size as this chick, and finding clothes is very random. She's about an 6-8, and found clothes in sizes 8-12 these days. Oy.
Tuesday, May 21, 2002
Women who have condomless sex are less depressed.
Why? Apparently there's something in the men's sperm that works like an anti-depressant. How bizarre.
Tuesday, May 21, 2002
Washington D.C. won't let any married woman's baby have her maiden name.
Boy, does that tick me off.
Tuesday, May 21, 2002
Men can be injured when removing bras
Anyone else reminded of the Monty Python Upper Class Twit of the Year competition, where the twits were supposed to remove bras from mannequins and destroyed the mannequins?
I tried telling this to my boy, but this er, didn't dissuade him any.
Tuesday, May 21, 2002
Political strife and beauty pageants.
Did you know Miss Lebanon and Miss Israel can't be photographed together or they can be exiled from home? Miss Lebanon's plain old dropping out this year.
Tuesday, May 21, 2002
Which Spike are you?
Tuesday, May 21, 2002
What I thought I should do vs. what I did.
This essay was written by a guy who wrote a book about his wife having cancer. It's both touching and has the snark factor about it. My favorite lines:
"Well, I guess I was pretty supportive. I mean, I went to some key appointments, I tried hard to make Kirsten laugh, I tried to just do whatever she wanted me to do. Loving I did pretty well too, but that's pretty much of a given. Hmm… I kind of forgot there for a minute while I was patting myself on the back about how supportive I was that I made Kirsten cry because I didn't want to take off work to take care of her when she got out of the hospital. Yep. I am Mr. Supportive."
"I wasn't sure I wanted to be carried down the beach by a God that would strike my wife with a potentially fatal illness at 32, or make my dad fall over dead at 35. I'd
be afraid He might drop me." Damn straight, I've wondered about that myself.
Tuesday, May 21, 2002
As the state of reality TV continues to plummet...
I guess this one had to happen at some point.
Wednesday, May 15, 2002
The double standard of oral sex in middle school
Sars rocks. Again.
On the same subject, here's the return of
Salutations Pussycat! Bwahahahahahah!!!! Wendy or Sars or both of you- I would adore it if there was a continuing adventures of Salutations Pussycat thing going on. This makes me laugh and laugh and laugh. Especially when I read them aloud in the little cat voice.
Wednesday, May 15, 2002
Two of the winners in this sexual abstinence essay contest are pregnant.
At least one of them was pregnant before winning this, so I can't exactly blame her, but I'm wondering about the other one. And having sex with a condom is Russian roulette with your life?! Aren't we exaggerating a bit? More like, without one, darlin.
Wednesday, May 15, 2002
A great story for chicks.
"There are some things worth giving up anything for, even your freedom, and getting rid of your period is definitely one of them."
Wednesday, May 15, 2002
Ooh! An interview with Cynthia Heimel!
Wednesday, May 15, 2002
Love in the elevator (at work), love on the desk, love under the desk, love in the supply closet...
Wednesday, May 15, 2002
Would you have been able to tell they meant princiPAL and not princiPLE?
I sure as hell would have been confused by the definitions they gave this kid.
Wednesday, May 15, 2002
How to cheat at solitaire and FreeCell
Yes, really, there are cheats for those too. I told the boy this and he nearly had a fit at the idea of anyone wanting to cheat at those games.
Wednesday, May 15, 2002
Girl loses movie role for looking TOO young for the love interest
Yeah, I want to hear that line when the girl's 30 and the love interest is 60, though...
Wednesday, May 15, 2002
The sugar pillsl/depression meds thing.
Interesting that they mention that people in drug studies get about a billion times more attention than your average depressed person, which er, might affect things.
Mildly depressed older women tend to live longer than those who are not depressed at all. Well, there's a surprise.
Wednesday, May 15, 2002
Awww.
Wednesday, May 15, 2002
The geek review of Spider-Man.
Bizarre.
Wednesday, May 15, 2002
All about sushi
Wednesday, May 15, 2002
Why trying to be an author sucks ass.
Wednesday, May 15, 2002
Loved this editorial.
"For guidance on how to handle the current crisis, the Vatican need only note how the Protestant, Anglican and Jewish faiths are coping with their respective sex scandals. Oh, right, they don't have any. Those religions,
though endorsing piety, do not endlessly obsess about sex, nor do they ask their clergy to take an impossible vow like celibacy. Those religions probably attract healthy-minded, sexually mature adults who enjoy physical
expression and release with consensual partners who are not children. Meanwhile, the Catholic Church will continue to attract the sexually confused, stunted and ashamed to its blessedly shrinking ranks." And people wonder why I don't like the Church and am ashamed to have been baptized into it?
Wednesday, May 15, 2002
Someone else besides me has tried to get on camera during Sorority Life filming
Ironically, I managed to find some MTV filming going on during Picnic Day, though I will say it was a small group tucked on the far side of campus doing a confessional. I love the quote in here about whether or not MTV will make this town look hip when in reality there's nothing to do.
Wednesday, May 1, 2002
The Official Rock Paper Scissors Guide
Who knew they had strategies for this? Though I guess it might come in handy for LARP games on the rare occasions when the boy brings me to one.
Wednesday, May 1, 2002
Best Summer Job Ever
I'd apply, except I don't think they'd be too hyped to take someone who's hardly ever played Nintendo (which wasn't allowed at my house- God forbid you interrupt Dad's TV).
Wednesday, May 1, 2002
Some possible flaws in that nasty fertility study that everyone's panicking about.
I'm boggled at the guy who says this doesn't mean women should feel compelled to start having children younger. Um, isn't that the entire fucking point of the study? "Breed now, or YOU NEVER WILL! Breed now, or your life will be wasted because you never were a mommy! Screw all your other life plans!"
Honestly, the whole thing is depressing and ticks me off. Unfortunately, this is biological fact we're stuck with. Which then leads to people advocating, well... going back to the good old days when women stayed at home and bred at 20.
Women can't have it all--in fact, can't even have most of it. Why even bother taking our daughters to work if they're only going to quit to have babies? Like this article says, what makes them think women are going to be happier going this route yet again, stifling themselves at the expense of marrying and breeding ASAP?
Wednesday, May 1, 2002
This actually convinced me that a Segway is cool.
Now I think I want one.
Wednesday, May 1, 2002
And I thought the vegetarian dog in Shirley Valentine was bad...
Wednesday, May 1, 2002
You knew at some point some hot chicks would come up with this idea and execute it...
Wednesday, May 1, 2002
If you don't watch the commercials, you're stealing the programming.
What, is this guy on crack? The hell? (And just look at what he said about bathroom breaks...)
Wednesday, May 1, 2002
Stop with the domain stealing, people!
Tuesday, April 30, 2002
Hah!
Tuesday, April 30, 2002
The plight of the poor single male
Tuesday, April 30, 2002
Oh, that's a lovely way to find out you're getting laid off in the future.
Tuesday, April 30, 2002
Chilling Effects Clearinghouse.
If you've got a site and the lawyers decide to hunt you down (as has happened to me a few times, joy oh joy), the above link will translate those letters from legalspeak to you, and help you understand what's going on and what you've done wrong or not. Useful resource these days.
Tuesday, April 30, 2002
And newspapers wonder why they're not doing so well in advertising?
I love Krispy Kreme- and I'm not a person who likes donuts all that much- but this is over the top.
Tuesday, April 30, 2002
Note to self: Don't leave the state.
Seriously, I'm not afraid to fly because I think I'm going to get blown up, I'm afraid to fly because of the scary regulations and paranoia in airports. Hell, nearly anything can be used as a weapon if you get creative enough... and yeah, I think if this keeps up we'll all have to go onto planes empty-handed and nude or something.
Tuesday, April 30, 2002
A garden monorail! Cool!
Tuesday, April 30, 2002
Why on earth did they keep the Batchelor and his chosen incommunicado for so long? Weird.
Tuesday, April 30, 2002
Wow, someone else doesn't get why Bob Hope is so adored, either.
I just do not find the man funny, I'm afraid.
Tuesday, April 30, 2002
Random Name Generator
I'll keep this in mind for my next identity...
Tuesday, April 30, 2002
Form your evil plan without even having to think much about it!
Friday, April 26, 2002
Into the Buzzsaw: what happens when journalists investigate the stories the government doesn't want investigated.
Basically, you're completely discredited and they ruin your career. Lovely. I so want to get this book. For those of you wondering why Enron wasn't investigated much, this is why, and what happens to those who do. I just love the dilemma this puts journalists into- do they fight for the truth, or save their own ass?
Friday, April 26, 2002
Househusbands WAY more likely to die of heart disease.
Aw CRAP! (Though they say women are three times as likely to if they're hardnosed professionals, too.) They seem to chalk this up to switching of traditional roles and the stresses it causes on the body to not be a macho manly breadwinner. They've got a cautionary note at the end saying this doesn't mean all men should work/women stay home, they just need more support, but I'm sure that's not how it's going to be read once the Republicans get ahold of it... (Yup, I'm cynical.)
Friday, April 26, 2002
Man, can you please stop futzing with the original Star Wars flicks already? Please?
Less Jar Jar, more happy Jen, a snipey George. George also considered getting rid of Jar Jar's horrible speech, but for some sad reason didn't actually do it. Drat. If Jar Jar actually talked gooder, I might not hate him so much in the next flick.
Heh. I never heard before how "I love you" "I know" came about before...
Friday, April 26, 2002
Curses, foiled again?
Yesterday this lovely link allowing people to read NYTimes links without having to register went around. I was delighted, read the page, and saved this to add on to here. I figured it'd be great, since I normally won't link to NYT stuff here and now I could. (I have enough usernames and passwords to keep track of without having to have one just to read the news I can find in other places, thankyouverymuch. As for the rest of you, it seems unfair to me to force you to register to read something.).
Today, however, when I tried to use it, it just sent me to some lame register page. I suspect the plot has been foiled, but if you want to see if it'll work for you...
Friday, April 26, 2002
Make your own little Lego figure!
I so love this.
Friday, April 26, 2002
He made a roller coaster in his own back yard.
COOL!
Wednesday, April 24, 2002
Please stop harassing the single people.
Boy, have I been there and done this. And I utterly agree with this: "I think it’s actually a hostile statement. They really mean ‘Just find someone already like I have and shut up, so I don’t have to deal with this anymore.’"
Wednesday, April 24, 2002
On Internet celebrity
Wednesday, April 24, 2002
Bullies get technological now.
Apparently the bullies are now sending nasty e-mail and text messages. Which makes me wonder: why on earth are the victims giving out their numbers and e-mail addresses to them?!
Wednesday, April 24, 2002
Donate to charity and this mayor will let you kick him in the ass.
Oooh. That sounds like fun!
Wednesday, April 24, 2002
MTV comes to my town for its sorority life.
We're all still baffled at why MTV would want to come here, where you rarely see people running around in skimpy bikinis and you don't even see drunks all that often.
Speaking as a resident, I've hardly seen MTV around at all. I walked by their sorority house on the first day of filming and saw a sign saying that anyone who walks by here may end up on camera, but nothing was being filmed. And at Picnic Day last weekend, we spotted two camerafolks filming some sorority girl and two other women at a table in front of one of the restaurants. My cousins and I casually strolled behind them so we could get on camera. Aren't we just the cleverest?
Wednesday, April 24, 2002
Oh god, a P. Diddy version of Osbournes.
Kill me now.
Wednesday, April 24, 2002
What the heck?
And I thought Star Wars fans were bad for drooling over Boba Fett all the time: Some extra in Fellowship of the Ring that's barely on the screen for a few seconds has now acquired a fan website devoted to him. They even had to make up a name for his er, character. I am utterly baffled.
Wednesday, April 24, 2002
A bizarre-ass theory as to who will win Survivor.
Though after last week's episode, I'm starting to think this might actually happen!
Can't wait to watch this one.
Burnett claims they try to weed out all the wannabe actors. I laugh my ass off, because he's failing miserably.
Wednesday, April 24, 2002
The Velma Syndrome
Girls who wear glasses tend to think they're automatically unattractive. Speaking as one... well, I certainly had the ugly rep growing up and through high school. Things have changed since the college years- somehow I seem to be regarded as quite the babe now- yet I'm always baffled by this. "I have glasses," I think, "why on earth are those men oogling me on the street?" As it indicates in the article, even tall skinny blondes with nice boobs automatically figure they become hideous to everyone with glasses on.
Wednesday, April 24, 2002
They're making a sequel to Dude, Where's My Car?
What's it gonna be titled? "Seriously, Dude, Where's My Car?"
Oh lord.
Wednesday, April 24, 2002
WalMart takes out hefty life insurance policies on employees, their families see none of it.
Sleazy!
Wednesday, April 24, 2002
Falling test scores lead to the elimination of band.
Gah, that's sad. I'm so tired of hearing about test scores.
Wednesday, April 24, 2002
I can't believe they got away with this.
And people wonder why I'm not chomping at the bit to get my own domain?
Wednesday, April 24, 2002
People like liberal policies- they just don't like liberalism.
Wednesday, April 24, 2002
Things To Do Next Semester
Speaking as someone who was in the creative writing department, I laughed my ass off at #16.
Wednesday, April 24, 2002
I told you Martha Stewart was evil.
And this bit from this article made me very sad: "and the other half think it ratifies their life and worth as human beings." God, your life is ratified by how nicely you set the table and make handmade placemats?
Wednesday, April 24, 2002
You can't win no matter what you do.
I swear to God, "Mother" Nature must be a man, because "she" is cruel. And even if you try to have kids at a young age, you end up screwing yourself financially for good instead. Lovely.
I love this:
"The second-guessing of women's lives is going strong. Really, women should be used to this by now, but somehow, it always takes us by surprise.
And so to recap:
As a society, Americans don't approve of teen pregnancy, unwed pregnancy or pregnancy by anyone who might at some point in their lives require public assistance. Nor do Americans particularly care for people getting married too young or too often; the divorce rate is a perpetual concern.
When women in their early 20s have children, we wonder what's their rush.
Then again, we harbor a fair amount of antipathy toward women who aren't interested in having children at all, and as a society, we think of single people as occupying a sort of cultural waiting room.
What's more, we'd prefer that mothers not work outside the home, in large part so society can continue its harsh ongoing critique of stay-at-home moms.
The exception to the rule is, of course, mothers on government aid. We want them in the workforce immediately, if not sooner.
We'd like young women to stay in school, get their educations, find gainful employment, pay their taxes, support themselves, climb the career ladder and build a solid economic base for their lives.
We'd also prefer that they forgo their ambitions and have their children as early as possible.
But please, ladies, have those kids early and often. Well, no. Not now. Maybe later. But not if you wait too long.
In sum, the point isn't Hewlett's research, which for the sake of sensationalism brushes aside the fact that half of America's powerful female executives do have kids.
Instead, the point is to let women know that no matter what choices they've made in life -- and no matter how satisfied they are with their lives -- they will never, ever escape being blamed for having chosen."
This guy's got a solution of sorts, and it would even start tomorrow: "Women Date Down Day," in which successful women ask out er, less successful men, who will hopefully marry them and then proceed to stay home with the kids or something. I'm still shaking my head at this one.
Wednesday, April 24, 2002
For love of Doctor Octopus
I'd never even heard of Doctor Octopus before this, but I was amused.
Wednesday, April 24, 2002
Police buy PT Cruisers so kids'll think they're cool, kids roll their eyes.
I'm with the kids here. Why on earth would anyone design a car that obviously has a bigger ass than the rest of the car?
Wednesday, April 24, 2002
The New York Post makes up the blurbs that people say.
It's quite amusing to read the stuff people actually said vs. the flowery BS that runs in the paper.
Wednesday, April 24, 2002
What you can learn about a president from how he chooses to deceive you.
Coincidentally, I found this one about how Bush's screw-ups are deleted from official transcripts. That's just not right.
Wednesday, April 24, 2002
Which High School Stereotype Are You?
An outsider for me. Gee, what a surprise.
Wednesday, April 24, 2002
Tons of new forms of birth control! Yay!
Wednesday, April 24, 2002
Everyone wants longer vacations, but we feel guilty.
You know, I agree with the sentiments in this column (i.e. take time off), but the question is, how do you do that when you're not even allowed to most of the time? When you have to fake sick just so you can have some personal time, when you only get one week off a year, when you spend your days off avoiding the phone because work is calling you to come in- how on earth do you get around this kind of stuff?
Wednesday, April 24, 2002
Happy birthday to me...
Uh, yeah, just had to say that. Woo hoo!
