Foxtail @ Pitas

Welcome to my page
Added a tagboard. Kudos to Ennui for helping out the poor dude here!! :D

About myself
Name: Caleb, Shixiong
Age: 23, Male
Country: Singapore

Monthly Archives
December 2002
January 2003
Februray2003

The GrayFox's Den

Rantings....

Tuesday, April 1, 2003 09:12 p.m. ___________________________________________

I got this little ucler on my upper lip and it's giving me loads of pain... *Ouch* It hurts whenever I eat, drink or talk...argh.

Anyway, considering that I saw Ken's one a long time ago, which happens to be on the tongue *GASP*, guess it makes the pain more bearable. I shall endure the wait for the wound to heal.

Monday, March 31, 2003 09:42 p.m. ___________________________________________

I think I am giving myself too many things to practice. Too many lian4 xi2 qu3, too many songs, all seems equally attention demanding to me every time I practice. Not to mention the august bh concert's songs...

Not that I am complaining. Its one of those things that I can keep my mind focused on..

Sunday, March 30, 2003 01:45 p.m. ___________________________________________

I ran, puffed, huffed, but just couldn't avert the defeat (again).

I can't believe a 5 man midfield can't hold the ground against their 4. And like what a team-mate told me after the match, we got to stop being so "encouraging" and start looking at our flaws and weakness seriously. Well, he could be right and wrong. But I felt that with at least a year's experience under our belt, we could have done much better individually and as a team.

And we have quite a few M.I.A players who haven't been coming for practices and sunday matches for some time. If you tell me there are better ways to tell a person "what happened?", it's too late.

Saturday, March 29, 2003 11:10 p.m. ___________________________________________

Saw the face of a pickpocket today. We were crowding up the entrance of a bus when he struck, right in front of me. But just before anyone could react, the lady who got her wallet picked immediately turned around and snatch it back.

The lady seems to be quite in a bit of shock, so she didn't scream out, draw attention or anything. But thankfully, the man walked away sheepishly and pretented nothing has happened.

With bad times like this, there will be many more such people around. Word of caution to all, guard your belongings when you go out.

Friday, March 28, 2003 09:39 p.m. ___________________________________________

Spend my afternoon in NTU trying to impress my professor with what I have done during my job attachment. Haiz, I feel so low, but what to do? He's the one that determines my grade..

Just realised that I strive on assignments, big or small. As long as they make me feel that I am needed. =)

Thursday, March 27, 2003 06:37 p.m. ___________________________________________

I am home this thursday with the cancellation of practice due to the SARS scare that pop up recently.

Everyone's jittery and cautious. Maybe the government officials think it pays to be safe.

But we have become paranoid with regards to the increase in infection cases. Was on this crowded train and this poor lady happened to be coughing loudly. So many eyes were looking in her direction with some of them smiling sheepishly, finger pointing and everything.

Can't people think with logic?

Thursday, March 27, 2003 12:20 a.m. ___________________________________________

Quite relieved. =) God answers prayers.

Wednesday, March 26, 2003 11:03 p.m. ___________________________________________

With all my years of studying, my engineering knowledge and life skills, I have failed to solve a particular mystery... until just now.

For the past 2 weeks, I had my fan blowing at midspeed during the night as I sleep. YET, with it pointing directly at me, I could barely feel even a slight breeze and would wake up sweating in the end.

Ladies and gentlemen, the mystery has finally been solved. I attribute the decrease in efficiency of my fan to ventilate to one single reason: the one centimeter thick of dust *GASP* that has formed on the blades and on the grills on both sides, that has impeded airflow into and out of the grills.

Okay, so you ask when was the last time I cleaned my fan. I honestly do not know... But I do know now that my newly water-washed, cleaned fan is blowing a steady cool stream of air at me as I type.

Anyway, I am happy now. =) *taking note of the next scheduled fan cleaning session*

Tuesday, March 25, 2003 12:08 p.m. ___________________________________________

"A doctor's mission isn't to prevent death but also to improve the quality of life. That's why you treat a disease, you win, you lose. You treat a person, I guarantee you, you win, no matter what the outcome."

-Robbin Williams in "Patch Adams"

I burst my dams there and then.

Monday, March 24, 2003 10:23 p.m. ___________________________________________

Dead Poet Society.

Another one of those rare movies where I am nearly moved to tears and totally inspired by it. A must see for teachers and would be teachers. Actually, it's a must see movie for anyone who wants to "seize the day".

The most memorable scene is when Robbie Williams was trying to teach the boys about conformity, about how people get sway into other people's opinions and views, following the crowd instead of forming their own perception.

Maybe I go learn write a poem of my own too...

Monday, March 24, 2003 08:28 p.m. ___________________________________________

Planned to do many things, but somehow couldn't get things to start. A glance at my to-do-list shows that quite a bit of the stuff are old stuff.

I have a great opportunity to do them with the 2 days of given-rest. What am I doing?

Sunday, March 23, 2003 10:05 p.m. ___________________________________________

Went to ToaPayoh Mos Burger for dinner, some time of solitute and to settle some personal admin stuff. In the end, I only finished 1/3 of the things in the list I have drawn up.

There were these 2 students, supposely art students, who were drawing and shading many pieces of drawings with pencils and it was quite intriguing to watch them as they draw. But strangely, the place was much much colder than usual so I left early before I freeze...hahaha.

Sunday, March 23, 2003 02:01 p.m. ___________________________________________

Another sunday soccer session this morning; Was actually billed the "Fit-&-Trim club" by fellow players...hahaha. But for those who want a tan like mine, this is a good chance to get it by coming down for soccer. =P But the sun was hot, real hot, though not as bad as the last few times we played. Thank God for those big clouds that shaded us every once in a while.

Saturday, March 22, 2003 11:29 p.m. ___________________________________________

Didn't expect the day to be so draining. Went for pastor Ro's wedding (Wow, pastor L *the bride* was really beautiful! Haha, but then again, there are no ugly brides. =P ) and then church service and then cell group...

Had a great worship session in church, it brought out the condition of my heart and so, guess that there was a renewal of passion for worship and praises to God.

Saturday, March 22, 2003 01:42 a.m. ___________________________________________

I had all of my things packed up for a mini personal retreat at Mos Burger to do some personal admin and stuff when K and L called for a night of kopi at serangoon gardens.

Hahaha, so off I went and unbelievably, lost track of time in the midst of our chit chatting. In the end, had to share a cab with K back home.

Session was pretty good. Discussed many issues and in the end, felt that some things became clearer in the end regarding our dg. =)

Friday, March 21, 2003 12:07 a.m. ___________________________________________

Amazed at how much a friend's action or word can boost your confidence level.

Had quite a great session today during bh practice. A friend's advice and chat the previous night helped alot in boosting my confidence..hahaha, though I had a long way to go, but hey, at least I am enjoying along the way. Someday, I will get there. Somehow lar. =)

Wednesday, March 19, 2003 07:36 p.m. ___________________________________________

I spend 6 hours today observing a technician at work on a machine. Literally took it down to the parts and rebuild it. Then there's the matter of tuning it, alighnment and everything. In the process, I learned quite a bit...so we conclude that it has been a fruitful day ok? =p

My email box gets flooded every night. From mass forwards, to email discussions, to lousy jokes, to advertisement spams... Use to have letter pals to write to and to write back. I always remembered the thrill at seeing the familiar envelope in the mailbox, the excitement in tearing up and then the fun at reading the letter.

Haiz, gone were the days of snail mail. It was so much more personal then.

Tuesday, March 18, 2003 06:15 p.m. ___________________________________________

I bought a 1.2 litres of mineral bottle and placed in on my table to combat the recent bout of cold. Okay, I did try to finish it every 3 hours and topping up after that.

Spend the entire afternoon on discovery channel programmes. Got this great episode on the life of one of the ancient Egyptian Pharaohs. And then a disgusting hour on bugs...the way maggots eat flesh, the way a certain wasp lay eggs on the back of an ant so that when the egg hatches, the ant's brain provides nourishing food for it... UCK

Sunday, March 16, 2003 09:31 p.m. ___________________________________________

It has been real hot the past 2 days...and taking 3 showers a day aren't helping.

The heat aggravated my frequent headaches, but the best way now to curb it is to stay at home and avoid the sun. Both which I couldn't do as I was busy temping yesterday and rushing today.

But I am not going to have to work tomorrow and the day after as my IA company takes a "production breather". Haha, I get to sleep late again. =p

Sunday, March 16, 2003 09:50 a.m. ___________________________________________

Just woke to an aching body. Slept real early last night after a long day of manual labour in the sun...which reminds me of the days in army,

It's a 1 day temp job at a carnival, where my buddies and I are suppose to man game booths and stations. It was baking hot the whole day, and a girl was in tears even as she stepped on the inflatable rock climbing cos it was that hot.

Anyway, it's a good way to earn some spare cash. =)

Saturday, March 15, 2003 12:23 a.m. ___________________________________________

Some things just need to be talked out in order to be effective. Guess that's "effective communication" for me. Getting your idea across without conflicts or mis-interpretations, seeing each other's point of view and coming to a mutual understanding.

Thursday, March 13, 2003 11:42 p.m. ___________________________________________

Had a great BH practice today. We learned the 2nd movement of Bai2 She2 Zhuan4; so that's 2 more movements to go for our 1st try of the entire song.

****************

Your life matters. Let's not accept the things of the old that we had went through, but look forward to what we can have in future. Have faith in yourself. I do for you.

Wednesday, March 12, 2003 11:02 p.m. ___________________________________________

Life matters. Your life, mine and those who are around me. I care too much to just leave you alone.

Wednesday, March 12, 2003 04:15 p.m. ___________________________________________

I feel like a pig. Woke up at 8am this morning, took breakfast and medication, and off to slumberland until 2pm+. Took lunch and medication and right now feeling the sleepiness that is settling in. *yawn*

But thank God, I am feeling better already. :)

Tuesday, March 11, 2003 09:46 p.m. ___________________________________________

I got a cold. So off to the doctor who gave me a day MC tomorrow. -Yeah!- *sneeze*

Now is the time when I would want someone to give me that warm blanket, or hot bowl of chicken soup or whatever. But that's not going to happen, so off I am going to pamper myself with rest, rest and more rest. *sneeze*

Monday, March 10, 2003 11:53 p.m. ___________________________________________

A really relaxed night, and an enjoyable one too.

"Do you concur?"

Sunday, March 9, 2003 01:53 p.m. ___________________________________________

This sunday soccer session was in one sense, a revelation. For the things I already know, they were reconfirmed. For the things that I like to know, they were too, revealed.

I am reaching the end phase of the setting up of a soccer team. All the efforts put in over the past one year plus aren't wasted, that's a good thing. Today, as I played, I recognise that the team has anchored on themselves. There are qualities in the people that will make the team lasting.

Slowly, I will soon close this chapter of my life, phase out and move on.

*******************

On a side note, I got to talk less, and start hearing more.

Saturday, March 8, 2003 10:53 p.m. ___________________________________________

I can't get sick of listening to the CD jia burned for me this week. And in it contains one of the Aug concerts' songs. So glad I will get to learn them, but I will have to leap a huge gap skillwise in order to attain the level required for it by August. Not panicking, but not in a very confident mood. See how lah. ^_^

Sermon today was taken from the last chapter of Malachi. And because of the dire relationships between children to fathers and fathers to children nowadays, it's preventing the blessings of God into our lifes.

But I am taking that first step of reconciliation, also recognising that it's their first time as parents. They have their fair share of struggles in being parents. Who knows what I will be like when my turn as a parent comes, so it starts from the heart. May take sometime, but I hope my relationship with my dad will improve.

Friday, March 7, 2003 11:01 p.m. ___________________________________________

There's nothing I can do at this moment...except to wait. Waiting seems the best option to take. But to wait for what thing? I am not even sure about that.

Friday, March 7, 2003 12:03 a.m. ___________________________________________

Everyone's problems seems biggest only to that person. Everyone has their own set of worries and things to deal with, so what makes us think that we should demand others to sympathize or show concern? I really don't know why I am doing that myself.

I wish I didn't kick myself so much with all the self-sabotaging with regards to emotions. Guess it's all the wishful thinking of mine, esp. when things are so beyond my control.

So what's next? Accept and live with it.

Wednesday, March 5, 2003 11:07 p.m. ___________________________________________

Slept late into the morning since I was excused from IA to attend a seminar/exhibition in school. The plan was actually to finish up all my admin and personal stuff and then make my way to school, but in the end, I didn't.

Spend the afternoon at a Chinese instrument shop in bras basar. The guy behind the counter was really nice and taught me a lot regarding the components of an erhu, namely the ma3, the xian4, the erhu and the result from various combinations. Hahaha, so now is the time for me to "experiment".

Also meet up jia, mi, sui, you, yun, jq and zq for BH concert planning and discussion. Guess my schedule will be packed in the coming months.

Oh yah, had my long delayed haircut also. :P

Tuesday, March 4, 2003 07:49 p.m. ___________________________________________

If there's one job description for my current IA attachment, It's that of a fireman. Anywhere, anytime, to put out "fires".

Sunday, March 2, 2003 06:57 p.m. ___________________________________________

Had a really tiring day, but nevertheless a very fruitful one, the sort of day that you want everyday of your life. So I'm in quite good spirits despite the day still more than 5 hours short of the next day.

Went for soccer session as usual at Bishan. The heat nearly killed me though, as I exhausted my 1.25 litres of water that was meant for personal consumption for the game. Even that was not enough.

I had a great and fun game. Actually seen a lot of the ball and action, which is rare for the person of limited set of soccer skills like me. :P

And off to Sumo Bento for lunch with 5 other soccer buddies and we nearly couldn't move after the meal. Hahaha, next time I am trying their raw salmon set.

And off again for a quick hot shower before going for my erhu lesson. My teacher actually upped the practice standards by asking me to train 3 different key of songs all in 1 session. Not to mention the first page of Liang2 Xiao1. So I am pretty happy with my progress but need alot more work. Hehehe, esp when I didn't have the time to practice the past few days and my teacher knew it just by listening to my playing.

So I am back now, everything all packed up for the working day, relaxing the evening away.

Saturday, March 1, 2003 11:03 p.m. ___________________________________________

Received a powerful revelation from the Bible today. Actually, it's more of a timely reminder that would enhance my daily walk with God. :) A reminder that God does not have to show himself in a grand scale or magnitude. And that sometimes, it's the gentle whisper or wind that is there. And sometimes, we can just miss it when we are focusing on the wrong things.

------------------------------

9 The he came there to a cave, and lodged there; and behold. the Word of the Lord came to him, and He said to him,"What are you doing here, Elijah?"

10 And he said,"I have been very zealous for the Lord, the God of hosts; for the sons of Israel have forsaken Thy covenant, torn down Thine altars and killed Thy prophets with the sword. And I alone am left; and they seek my life, to take it away."

11 So He said,"Go forth, and stand on the mountain before the Lord," And behold, the Lord was passing by! And a great and strong wind was rending the mountains and breaking in pieces the rocks before the Lord; but the Lord was not in the wind. And after the wind an earthquake, but the Lord was not in the earthquake.

12 And after the earthquake a fire, but the Lord was not in the fire; and after the fire a sound of a gentle blowing.

13 And it came about when Elijah heard it, that he wrapped his face in his mantle, and went outand stood in the entrance of the cave> ANd behold, a voice came to him and said,"What are you doing here, Elijah?"

--- 1 Kings 19:9~13

Saturday, March 1, 2003 09:39 a.m. ___________________________________________

Yeah, my 3rd archived month. :)

But my throat now feels sore and body feels feverish. Sigh. Am I going to fall sick? :/