Ever notice how much people change? You grow up with the same people, but they change, and the next thing you know, you're talking to a stranger. *sigh* Times are sad sometimes, but we gotta move on. And no, I'm not gonna preach all that "hey live up your senior year, guys" crap, because I don't believe in it. My philosophy is to get all the excess shiz done and over with. Screw high school, I'm ready for the next step.
Well, the new year is hear. My Christmas Break was nice - I caught up on some much needed sleep. On the other hand, I procrastinated too long with scholarship essays. Now, I'm frantically finishing them for January 15th. *bangs head on the wall* STUPID STUPID STUPID! Nothing can be done about it now though. =/
On an extremely sad note, I'm done with my Creative Writing class because the semester is days away from being over. EH, I get to move on to Echonomics *shudders*. Back to the text books and everything else in life that doesn't matter. Anyways, here's a poem that I wrote about me feelings on college and their stupid entrance essays...
The Institution Wants my Jargon
The Institution wants my jargon!
it craves my words
my quivering mind,
my heartless heart,
and My Soul.
Write it down! They say
Write your soul down
claw it apart and tear off bits,
but for heaven’s sake
Write It Down!
and then click the button
lick the stamp
send it to us
we want to see it jump hoops
How far can your soul go?
my life depends on it
and they would not stop there
Oh no!
The institution makes me bend and stretch
my words
with their endless queries
Why are you unique?
Why are we right for you?
Why do you like mashed potatoes?
Why? Why? WHY?
Cordial in their words, they try
But they want to see my inter-workings
my nerve stems
my laughing strings
They want it all! They want it all! They Want It All!
The Institution wants my jargon
sliced open, salted, and laid down on
a piece of white paper with black ink.
And the worst part of it is
…I will give my words.
Well, the holidays are going along well. There's tons of essays and crap to be written for my college money and what not. *sigh* I don't think I've ever hated words more. T_T
On the easier side of life, I've made some more oekaki! There are 6 new ones, to be exact. =D Check the gallery.
Call me a hopeless romantic, but I love the movie Sense and Sensibility! *sigh* British men in those tailored jackets and their starched white collars are walking sex in leather boots. Man. =D
Me: Yes, I have a membership card here.
Saleswoman: Okay, do you have it with you?
Me: No, but my last name is Wendlandt
SW: Whe-wait, can you spell that for me?
Me: W-e-n-d-l-a-n-d-t
SW: W-a-n-what?
Me: W-e-n-d-l-a-n-d-t
SW: W-e-n-d-l-e-can you spell that again?
Me: W-e-n-d-l-a-n-d-t
SW: *writes it down* Okay, let me check on the computer *she checks, without success...she walks to the other computer...then walks back*
SW: is this how you spell it? *holds up a sheet of paper - WENDLANT*
Me: No, there's a D before the T at the end...*starting to get ANGRY*
SW: Okay, I got it. *cashes me out and all that jazz*
OH MY ELFIN' GAWD.
It was my birthday yesterday! I'm a full-fledged adult now. I can buy smokes, I can gamble, I can buy porn...heh, yeah, because all of those things encompass adulthood. But anyways, it was a nice birthday. Quiet and relaxing. I tell ya, I don't feel eighteen though. =/
I went to see Gothika yesterday with Win and Bobes. There were a lot of in-your-face-shock scenes, like ghost spirits popping out of nowhere, but the plot wasn't anything spectacular. It was a bloody movie, though. Gore and cutting and slicing everywhere. Robert Downey Jr. and Halle NEVER hooked up, and that made me sad! They both wanted each other, bad. I guess neither of them had enough sex drive. Haha. But it's an okay movie, it wouldn't be at the top of my list, but it might make the list.
NEW ARTWORK - 2 NEW OEKAKI IN GALLERY
Because my brother updated my computer, I no longer have Adobe PS right now. However, my tablet and everything works smoothly now, so I've been oekaki-ing. Heh. Click on the X's in the gallery!
Before I crap my pants, let me just say that I am elated. Josh Groban, heart of hearts, is going to come to Minneapolis on February 9th to sing at the Orpheum Theatre!! How frickin amazing is that? Very. If any of you are fellow fans, the tickets go on sale to the general public on November 16. The prices range from $65-$85. And I think they are entirely worth it. You can get them at Ticketmaster or at the Orpheum website here. My brother is going to order mine for me on Tuesday (ha, fan club people get dibs on tickets on the 11th!!). BTW, his new CD is coming out on the 11th. So buy it. :D
Well, surprisingly, I had a wonderful day today. Which, as of late, is very rare. I went to bed feeling great, woke up feeling great, and will probably go to bed feeling great. One of those rare days where you want to preserve under glass. A Daius Rarius.
On a different note, St. Olaf College sent me some information about scholarship opportunities. Here's my list of ranked colleges:
University of Puget Sound St.Olaf College Knox College Grinnell College
I'm hoping to get into all of them, so I have some choice. =/ I was looking into MCAD and Pratt...but I gave up on those. I'm pathetic.
I HATE CHAUCER. I've been focusing my life around his writings lately, and I want him to die (again). I don't know why it matters if the Woman of Bath has red socks or not, who cares?! And the rhyming, oh don't even get me started. The test is on Thursday...but that may change (yet again). I think I'm ready, but I'm going to go swallow about twenty hours more of Mr. Chaucer. Maybe I'll choke this time, for real.
Why are all of Leibs's acquaintences dying?? Sad.
HALLOWEEN IS VAST APPROACHING!!!! I have my fangs ready...
The weekend is here! I didn't even know it, it crept up on me like some freaky cat. I had to turn in a NHS application yesterday...and I kept forgetting that it was FRIDAY, the DUE date, NOT Thursday. Oy~~! Great start for an NHS person, eh?
I'm going to the Symphony tonight! The theme is "envy" and the music is supposed to be good. The guest soloist is a dread-locked youth piano player. Should be fun. :) Otherwise Frieds is a LIAR!
So, I'm burnt out from everything. School. Work. Everything. I suppose that if I was a suicidal person, I would've committed suicide a while ago. yep.
But, on the brighter side, I have virtually no homework...and to darken the mood, I probably failed the test in English on Antigone and Oedipus Rex. The endless quotes that I had to name! XO Yeahp.
So, I might take some official art classes at the university or maybe down at the art institute. No idea. I just want to have some guidance.
I went to see "Whale Rider" with Jeff tonight. It was pretty good, very sad, but pretty good. It's one of those coming-of-age stories, this girl has to proof to her grandfather(the chief of a tribe in Australia) that she can be the next chief. Anyways, the girl is strong and all, but her grandfather is one MEAN OLD CODGER. I swear, the man had no sympathy or empathy or any 'thys. The little girl looked just like Orlando Bloom! It was weird.
So, why do people always have affections for people that they can never have? Situations and all, how unpleasant. And why am I drawn to music people?
Today was so morose for me. I had a wonderful dream last night. I dreamt that this boy and I were getting along great and we were friends, and we laughed and talked and had a wonderful time, just chillin. I woke up feeling so happy, and then it hit me that this boy and I are not friends, nowhere near it. That upset me, and I was gloomy all day.
I went to see my grad photos tonight (finally). They weren't all that bad. Boy, do you ever see ALL of your flaws though. Yikes. My parents and I found a bunch that we liked though, so that's nice. My pictures with my puppy turned out really cute. ^_^
So, the Homecoming game is this Friday. We've only been in school for TWO full weeks. Who is the idiot/idiots that changed it for crap's sake? Our h/c is usually in frickin October! I guess we can moan and gripe about it, but it ain't gonna do not good.
HaHa. He is sooo cute. XD I almost sent him a rose...but it's too late. *sigh*
I'm going to kill someone. Or Scream. Or Die. Why can't people just do one little thing to help out someone els? One LITTLE thing! For crap's sake. It's all on my shoulders because people are dumb.
I feel like I'm a dead chicken running around with it's head cut off. "Could you do this?" "You HAVE to do this" "Hurry and do this" "oh, you work" "Get This done." Freakin A, I'm one person. I don't understand why people assume that you can do anything and everything just because you are "responsible" and a "senior." It's like no one can do anything themselves, OH NO, let's ask Kristen to do it.
I just want to sit down for a while. Is that so much to ask? School SUCKS right now. Most of my fellow students in most of my classes can go get STDs and then see how wonderful life is. It's not.
I have to go get some oxygen before I hyperventilate.
Well, I am back...I've been back since Sunday evening. Colorado and the rest of the midwest was fun. My favorite part was Bear Country USA right outside of Keystone, SD. It was a drive through wildlife park - the bears are right next to your car. :)
School is starting tomorrow. What a shame. I did complete my summer reading though! =D
Get this, on bestbuy.com, they had a $2300 laptop on the site for $300!! I ordered one. But, it turns out that it was a mistake, it meant to say that you save $300 on your order, not the actual cost. But, I already ordered it, so hopefully it will come through, and I'll only get it for $300. YOu'd think it would come through, otherwise that'd be false advertising. =/ Who knows...
I'm in Colorado! =D The weather is very warm (90+ degrees), but it's not humid, so it's not as hot as home gets. It's kind of odd, because Denver is bigger than Minneapolis, but it's not nearly as densely populated. There's probably about 15 large office buildings, and then there's a few apartment building sprinkled everywhere, but it's actually suburban looking when you drive around. The hotel that we're staying at is right next to Invesco Field (football), and the thing is freakin HUGE. Makes the metrodome look puny. Anyways, we're going to a baseball game today. I forget who's playing, but it's supposed to be good. I'll be sure to get some postcards!!
Dang, this summer reading is KILLING me! I have 1500 pages so far...working up to 3000 before school starts!
So, ah, as my French speaking friends say...Salu~!
Well, I'm leaving this evening. I'll be sure to send a few postcards to you lovelies. :) Enjoy the rest of your summers, and I'll see you all in school. X]
I registered for my classes today. My schedule was kind of jacked when I first recieved it - I was in orchestra. O_o But now it's changed and good. Here it goes:
Period 1 -- Spanish 5 Period 2 -- Creative Writing (2nd sem. CITS Econ) Period 3 -- Concert Band Period 4 -- American Govt. (2nd sem. ????) Period 5 -- AP English Period 6 -- Calculus
So, it's not exactly my ideal schedule, but at least I finally get to have creative writing! XD I'm happy. I'm not looking forward to listening to someone in a foreign tongue at 9:00 AM, but what canya do. Hopefully this year will go by quickly and easily.
I get to go the cities for the weekend. Shopping and dinner and a show at Chanhassen. =] It'll be fun. The WHOLE family's going, except David of course...and that's kind of weird. But I guess I better get used to it. ba Humbug on school clothes, man. I wanna buy trinkety stuff.
XD
I am slowly awaiting school to begin. I'm anxious to get back into a frickin' routine, but I could care less about seeing everyone else again. I know, such a pessismist. But they can all have each other, my student body is stupid and way to occupied with sex a/o drugs. How fun. "We got drunk last weekend...and uh, we don't remember what went on, but it was fun!! Oh...and I might have a baby." Yah. Fun.
I feel artistically inept right now. Call it...artist's block. I think that I've started about five different pictures in Painter Classic, and I can't manage to finish a single one. *sigh* I have to make up a portfolio for college too. X(
So, I saw Just Married last night. It was funny at times, but it was overall cheesy. Ashton Kutcher makes for a good goofy, hyper teenager. And that's it. Him crying was just...eh, it didn't suit him.
Heh,heh. "Small Shake" guy stopped by DQ the other day and left a thirteen dollar tip! Sheesh, Shay and I made $15 in tips alone. That was nice. =D
Wow, today was the most boring day EVER. EVER. I sat around at home and accomplished nothing. Why didn't I go out and do something? Good question...and I have no answer for it. *sigh* Sadly to say, I'm tired of my vacation.
I saw Red Dragon last night. It was a fairly decentn movie. There was hardly any gore and brief nudity. I thought there was a great twist at the end, too. Eddie Norton did a good job. :) But he just doesn't seem like the FBI type, more like the tongue-tied fiance that you're about to break up with or something. Someone like that.
OK. So, I have nothing more to say. Back to watching TV...
So, my summer is still wasting away. I feel like I've wasted it for some reason. It's not like I haven't done anything at all, because I have. I guess I'm just a little melancholy and a little bit bored. *sigh*
I'll be away to the cabin with my cousins from Tues-Thurs. So, I won't be updating then (not like I do anyways). Maybe I'll feel some worth at the cabin.
PARENTS. X( Where to start? My parents make me angry. But only at times. But I still can't wait to move out and go to college. And experience life. REAL LIFE.
Don't you hate it when your parents don't take you seriously? Something bothers you or is important to you, and they just laugh it off. GAWD!! I'm unhappy. I have few reasons to be, but I am unhappy. Hooray.
So, summer is slowly slipping through my weak grasp. Working keeps me busy, but on average, only 15 hours a week busy. *sigh* It's better than having no job atall though.
Yuck. Petey threw up on my floor last night. It was gross. I think he lurched his WHOLE supper...it was a lot. I'm sure everyone wanted to know that. XD
So, the puppy's been over like every single day this week. And he's over at least the whole week on average. He's sort of...MY puppy. XD That's nice. But the daycare children are so freakin obsessed with the dog. You put him outside and he has a crowd. Oh well, at least he's getting some attention.
Well, the new design is up. I couldn't stand that blue one anymore. I rather like this...this...PEA green-ness. It's different.
So, I've seen Pirates of the Caribbean about three times now, and I'm still rearing for more. I love Johnny Depp and his eccentricity and his eye liner. He's so lovable in a dirty kind of way. Dirty being literally dirty, not naughty. I like him. He was sensible and smart, while stupid and cooky at the same time. He was like that in Sleepy Hollow too. Man, his hair was good in that movie. All dark and long and kind of wavy-curly. But enough about Mr. Depp.
Well, now Jason is off and married. I only have one brother left who is not married. He's 28. He's getting old. So, now I'm the only fledgling left in the nest...AND I LOVE IT. Man, I didn't cry, but I dunno. Jason's Jason. It was so hot and humid during his wedding day. No air conditioning and 100+ people at the church and me in a long dress...it stuck to me and I was sweating like crazy! But I'm glad it's over. It was a nice wedding. :)
What's up with kids my age thinking they're so serious about their relationships? It's time to enjoy high school (although I really don't) and be a kid (although I don't consider myself one). Boy, this is going nowhere. *sigh* But I don't get it. To me, it's weird to see a couple my age act like they're married. I guess it works for some people...maybe I'm too immature to understand.
Anyways, my plan is to meet "Mr. Right" in college. Kiss off high school. Kiss off.
I got the job at Dairy Queen. XD And school's out now! So, I guess that's a good start to the summer so far...now if I could only get over the stupid ACTs that are coming up...
It's hot out. Well, it feels really hot. I guess that's what I get for wearing two layers and pants. *hmph*
So, the jazz band went to Breezy Point. It was fun, very small and cozy. There were less people than last year, and the weather was kind of cold, although Emma and I did get our tennis "game" in. Haha. The evening was filled with Sharpie marker tattoos (oofta, Lucy is one heck of a tattoo artist!). I think most of the boys got one or two or three. There were some eye lid tattoos, but we won't go there. There was some bra-in-the-bed scandal too. I don't know too much about that though. =/
Commencement is tonight. I don't want to go, and I don't want to play. I don't want to watch the seniors do the traditional ceremony - I'm going to miss some of them a lot. =*( Oh well, life goes on.
School is ALMOST over...I have like...3/4 of a day left and I'm officially a SENIOR!! XD
Blah, I'm feeling ornery again. It's like...a constant mood now. *bad self, BAD* But yeah. I'm still not too fond of trusting people who...ah, well, trusting people and then getting my fingers stepped on. It hurts, and I'm done with it. From now on, save some people, everyone is now at a 5ft distance from me. Yeahp. Why think so much of people when they don't/won't ah...whatever.
So, we're going down to pick out a puppy for Erik and Kristin on Sunday. ^________________^ It turns out that the owners of the dogs life 15 mns. outside of Superior, so that's nice. I've told Petey about his new "cousin" about 10 times today. Heh,heh.
So now, I must go pack for Breezy Point getaway. I hope that I don't come back with criminal charges of assault or murder...because I just might.
I had my recital tonight at 6:30. Man, I was so nervous. ((O_O)) But, it went OK. My parents thought it was great (as most parents do). I felt so alone up there on the stage though. The sound in Weber Hall is so...open.
I've been signing yearbooks like crazy. Stupid reservations of pages has started again. I do it. And everyone else does it too. It's stupid, but I still do it. *sigh* It's not like I'm never going to see most of these people again, save the seniors. But anyways.
I think that if you worry too much about what everyone else thinks, then you never get to be yourself. So there.
Yearbooks finally came. I've only signed a few, and no one has signed mine yet(which is A-OK with me). I wanted to wait and get some perm. markers for people to use in mine. Fun and fake comments immortalized. Hooray.
Since everyone seems to be commenting about the "bon"fire thing on Sunday night, so will I. I don't understand why someone has to talk a lot and act like a retard to be considered happy. I was content not talking and just sitting back. But as soon as I'm out of hearing range, everyone's all "why's she mad? she must be mad." No. No. No. Do you know what assuming does? Yeah. I guess it made me mad that everyone thought that I was mad. Anyways, I didn't feel like getting in on some of the conversation. I don't think the whole "weenie" inuendo could've been taken any further, but whatever. I'm just crabby now. I guess I need a break.
I don't know people as well as I thought I did. I guess I was just being naive. It takes me a long time to completely trust people. I'm still having a hard time trusting some of my friends right now. Just as I'm about to, I get smacked in the face with something that hurts. I don't think it's done intentionally, but I take it to heart. I really want to get out of Minnesota. I don't care about what my friends think. I want to move away, far away. Who cares about confrontations, interventions, and communication. It doesn't work because nobody does it. Everyone is too judgemental. Everyone talks too much. Everyone is too nosy. And that pisses me off. Right now, I don't even want to be around any of them. And NO, to all you chauvinistic males, I do NOT have PMS. Gawd. Can no one be serious anymore?
This school year is drawing to a close rather quickly. I'm so excited for summer, but then I'm afraid of being the oldest. I'm going to miss some of the seniors that are leaving (that's about 10% of the whole lot...I really don't like the rest). I want my yearbook so I can get on the "sign-my-yearbook" bandwagon! I like to compete with myself and get more signatures each here. *evil laugh*
So, I have to go to a birthday party on Friday. (Yes, juniors can have birthday parties.) I must say that these parties aren't as thrilling as when I was young, but the birthday person gets presents, and I suppose that is thrilling for him/her. I also have the Groom's Dinner/Rehearsal Dinner/Everyone-in-the-wedding-eat-at-my-house-Dinner on Friday night. I'll have to try to balance the two. I'm really not looking forward to Friday night. *shudders* socializing. */shudders* There's all the strangers at my house, and then there's the "couples night" at the birthday party. Which one bothers me more? I'm not sure. *sigh*
This brings about a NEW subject. Why do people date if they're so uncomfortable with each other? It's like "hurry, let's date before we really get to know eachother and hate eachother!" OK, so maybe it's not exactly like that, but some (stress the SOME) of these couples seem so awkward. They don't know what to do. Do we hug? Do we kiss? Is holding his/her hand all right? Should I call him/her? What do I do? I'll tell ya what to do, WAIT till you really, really, really like someone that you can be really, really, really comfortable around! Why waste time, trying to figure out if your other likes PDAs? Good golly. And it would all be OK if these little romances didn't last less than a week or two. Now, c'mon, that's just ripping on someone's heart. Ouch. Ouch. OUCH.
OK, I'm mad now. So, I better go.
the journal 