Is there such a thing as a "better church"? Really? Help me find one also. Because I'd like to witness that for myself.

Don't mind me. I'm just remembering certain conversations I had a few years back. I'm wondering if people remember them too.

Really?

      Sometimes, I can only continue to pursue things that I know and I feel the conviction to do which are right. Sometimes, I wonder if the big picture is blurring away as I walk this path.

      If the whole GRC senior class hates me then so be it. If everytime I DO go running to Mr. Fan and letting him know is because that's my duty. I cannot let things go unreported.

      BECAUSE I am your TEACHER. I may be a friend when you want the support, comfort and assurance. But by all means, when it touches on discipline, when it touches on character and sticking to obedience.. I will and will always scold, reprimand, correct and report. So if you get confused why I can be nice and strict the other moment..I'm sorry. But a teacher must be a teacher. If I fail to correct before its too late, if I fail to report when I know I should have and ANYTHING happens after that... I have to face the consequences.

      I said I wouldn't complain during Devotion on Thursday. So I won't. Everyone can go and live their lives the way they want it to be. Frankly, free will is the best option I could ever give my students at this point.

      Choose your own path. Write your own future. You don't need anyone to tell you where you should go. You don't need anyone to point out things anymore. You're grown up, all of you are grown up.

      It's time for me to move on. To do the things I should do and let go of things I perhaps shouldn't have put my hands to. Maybe I did make a mistake.

At the Cross I bow my knees
Where You're blood was shed for me
There's no greater love than this
You have overcome the grave
Your glory fills the Highest Place
What can separate us now?

And when the earth fades
Falls from my eyes
And You stand before me
I know, You loved me
I know, You loved me

      It's been a while since I've been dreaming dreams that are not a repetition of the day's activities. Early on Friday morning after dropping off to sleep at 5am I had this dream...

      I was with a lot of people. All of them, were totally strangers to me. I don't know these people now, but I was familiar with them in my dream. They were young, and by the way I addressed them, I knew they were my students.

      In the dream, most people had the "tidak apa" attitude, some were so caught up in their past hurts that it made them bitter and angry youth. I remember clearly that there was this boy who kept having bad nosebleeds every time he got mad.

      When I was dreaming, I was constantly feeling the sense of Christ's eventual arrival. More accurately, the thought and feeling that kept surfacing within me at that moment was...Jesus is coming!!!! and the excitement was overwhelming and I just couldn't stop talking about it! I ran from student to student, more than 50 people, and started to tell them that Christ was coming, Christ was coming. I asked them to get ready because its happening sooner than we think.

      Some repented, some rejoiced. Some got down on their knees and repented while others together with me caught the excitement and we began talking non-stop on how rapture would happen. Rapture didn't happen in the dream, but our thoughts and imagination in the dream became so vivid to me that I saw visions of how people would rapture...it was just a flash of light and the person would just disappear. The light is not like any other light we can see in our world...golden, holy and beautiful at the same time. Even the gold flash it has, we can't recreate here, I've never seen it.

      In the dream itself I shared about how Jesus is coming and I urged some people to accept Christ. Many got down on their knees and prayed. Remember the boy whom I said would have a nosebleed all the time? He was ready to kneel down and pray and accept Christ but suddenly he stood up and raged and had a nosebleed. At that moment, I suddenly was able to look into his mind, kind of like when you use a microscope and focus or zoom in on something...I zoomed into his thoughts. I saw that he was hurt from the past and that past kept him angry but most of the time he was the one responsible for keeping the wounds fresh. So I just pointed at him and scolded him, "You know why you always have nosebleeds? It's because you hold onto your hurts and you're angry. It's stopping you from living!"

      There was also one scene where I was telling the youth toa read the Bible. I confessed that, "Even I need to read more. I'm guilty of not reading it enough."

      At the end when I woke up, that same desperation that I had in the dream that "CHRIST IS COMING!!!" was still with me, vivid like anything. I really thought Jesus was coming like in a matter of hours or minutes. I realise that in reality as I woke up and knew it was all a dream... that Jesus IS coming soon!!!!

      I have no idea when. But I have a stronger conviction. And I realise that many areas of my life need to be made fit as I await the return of my King. At the same time of equipping myself, I need to also tell others that Christ is returning whether they believe it or not. And to see my students in the dream, although they aren't my students yet, I realise that the younger generation need to be reminded much about the coming of Christ.

      Even now, to think of the dream again, to recall it again, I feel excited that Christ is coming. I can't help but want to tell everyone. I pray that God enables me with wisdom and anointing to do so.

      Christ is coming!!!