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My job is starting to become actual work. It stinks! Sorry for the late updates. FavaBeans are easy to grow, historically important, and good for you, too. They are also known as broad beans. And they do go well with a nice chianti. I hate Hotmail. If anyone uses another web-based email system (besides Yahoo), and has good things to say about it, please let me know. I always think of my friend Bob Stank when I see these kinds of catalogs. He was always fantasizing about prying up manholes, and looking very official while doing it. More elegant slacking: The Pixel Lab. Try Loise for a while. Monkeys really shouldn't smoke. How to name your child if you're a Nature Goth. Temp tidbit: The Fleetwood Mac woman has gone for the hairspray 5 times already and it's only 1:40. Stay away from the spray, kids - there's abuse potential there. Damn those dams. Keep these dams. Someone's crappy photos are another one's art. But there are exceptions to this rule. Sometimes I rely on Zagat's to find a place to eat, but maybe I shouldn't, considering who writes the little reviews. Maybe a better place to search is the Health Inspection Department. Another glamourous librarian. Yesterday's tidbit about how much Phish made at the Las Vegas shows got me wondering about how much they made at the huge New Year's show. Another search reveals the following, again from Amusement Business: "Easily commanding the top spot is the jam band Phish, who grossed an incredible $ 11.6 million at the Big Cypress Seminole Indian Reservation in the Florida Everglades. All 75,000 tickets available for the two day event sold out in advance." Good for them. They deserve it. So, Pube is our president. Let's move to Canada. Once in a while, Spin Magazine does its job right. I found this today from a magazine called Amusement Business: "Vermont rockers Phish, which recently announced it will be be taking an extended hiatus from the touring scene, performed a pair of shows Sept. 29-30 at Las Vegas' Thomas & Mack Center, grossing $978,587.50 from a total attendance of 35,988." My dad gave me the Beatles Anthology book at Thanksgiving. He's too impatient to wait for Hanukah, I guess. Over the weekend, I read a chunk of it. It's snippets of interviews from the Fab Four, chronologically arranged. The most interesting part about it is the different ways each one describes the same event. When they all went to India to study with the Maharishi, George spends considerable time about the spiritual aspects of the visit and how important the study of meditation is to him became as a result. Paul, on the other hand, is very hesitant, saying that he gave himself a deadline of two weeks in India, just in case the whole thing turned into a cult or something. John tends to exaggerate in his descriptions of everything, and with this he describes his disappointment that the Maharishi didn't have "the Answers" of life for him. And then there's Ringo, who simply and honestly mentions that they had a great time and they bought some beautiful clothing. I knew I felt more stable after I quit smoking, but I wasn't sure why. Have you seen George W.'s online diary? It seems that wherever I buy clothes, I am supporting unfair labor practices. I think I'm going to have to start sewing my own. One of the greatest aspects of the internet is the job hunting. Want to work in the great outdoors? How about at Wine Spectator or any other magazine? Or Disneyland? The Oxford English Dictionary? Temp tidbit: the woman who sits in the office near me sprays her hair with Aquanet twice daily. She also listens to Fleetwood Mac after her office-mate leaves. In case of in-flight emergency.... Those who've gone food shopping with me know that I have an interest in packaged foods, labelled in foreign languages, that are impossible to figure out. Some of my favorites are Yan Yan Snacks from Japan, candy from Sweden, Czech and Romanian snack foods, more Japanese snacks, and goodies from Korea, like Fried Chicken Snack. But what about food from our own beloved country that we cannot figure out?(thanks Doonie) Here's what I want for my holiday gift! Or maybe this. A good chunk of our weekend was spent watching a countdown of the best hard rock bands ever. I hope their next list is The 10 Best Drummer Deaths of All Time. My bad mood lifted today! I think it's due to a combination of the following factors: I had dinner last night with my sister, Russ, and Joshua; I'm wearing my new orange sweater; I figured out how to do my hair properly; I listened to the Scarred Shitless Shuffle on the subway this morning, and damn; Duane's starting to feel better, I think; and I'm dreaming about how we will win over Burlington in two years. It's the Public Library, not the Pubic Library! Librarians have an image problem. When I'm asked what I do for a living, most people say, "You don't look like a librarian!" This needs to change. There are anarchist librarians, street librarians, lipstick librarians, ska librarians, naked librarians, modified librarians, snarky librarians, librarians from hell, and librarian avengers. And, there's me. Or is it? Josh - here's your Mock Apple Pie. Unbelievable. How about a fried Mars bar to go with it? Another web comic: this time it's totally surreal and very homoerotic, with a 79% likelihood of confusing the reader: Jerk City. Have you ever researched your old boyfriends/girlfriends on the web? Want to see the awful assortment of my past? I'm getting my hair cut tonight. Here are some hair resources that I've found over time to be helpful: Camping stuff:
The best reason so far to buy a DVD player. This morning I realised that I've been in a pretty bad mood lately. I apologize to the people who have been on the receiving end of my crankiness. I think this weekend I'm going to have to remedy this problem.... I found a neat thing today:
"Like barley grains in Greece, beans were yonic symbols in Rome, as still shown by the Italian slang term for female genitals, fava,'bean.' Along with all other ancient femail-genital symbols, beans were credited with magic power to impregnate..." This morning I got the cute Florida sample ballot from 4 different people - here are some others that are just as good. Did you ever see a volcano blow smoke rings? And here's yet another example of the beauty of the internet. Diesel Sweeties is a very low-tech but oddly compelling comic strip. This election is unbelievable. I voted for Libby. Jalepeno poppers for the masses! Nuno broke his leg the other night. Literally. Please send him a get better soon note. Poor guy. Can someone please explain this to me? Or this? Maybe we should just ask Jesus. Please vote early and often! Salon has the Zagat's Guide to the Election. Very cute. So, last night we went to the next step up from Ikea and bought a new living room set, including a rug, two big chairs, and a coffee table. Duane smashed up the old, nasty couch, which was very satisfying both for smasher and spectator. Too bad for us, we didn't remember it was a no-garbage-collection day today, so now our little courtyard is filled with bite-sized pieces of sofabed. Today I present, for your amusement, a selection from Mike Gordon: Bess Bess Dangercity walked over to her spam cupboard and pulled out a can of Spam. "Shit, this is wormed!" remarked Bess in an all-too-feminine way. On another day, in another land of green, Bess's father wished several things to be true. The first wish to be true of, was an examination of the fricative. Second be do be true be combo fricabump.
--End of Chapter One- Bess's linguistics teacher looked his wide slits into her face and said "hackenpan stickenpan" and snuffed his nose and burped his lungs. Bess was not disgusted, she was bored and exhausted. She faded off into a dream. She dreamt of a tall man with short brown hair and grayish blue work clothes. The man has lost his eyes due to disease or accident and was left with mere sockets. The dream took place in a car, the man's car. He was driving and eating junk food. The man could easily put his trash in the waste basket on the driver side door, but he was too lazy to bend down so he stuffed things in his eye sockets. At the time of the dream, the man was stuffing the uneaten remains of his hot dog into his left eye socket, smiling and driving down the road. After awakening from the dream, bess [pron.: Bess] found herself scurrying to join her classmates in the journey to out of the class. "Thank God," thought Bess, "the scallion truck is here to fill my pansy with sunshine." So she bought a scallion kabob. It had, on it, scallions, un-sliced, un-washed, un-picked; and onions, whole, uncooked, unwashed, unpeeled, un-yun; and smothered with a green and black horseradish sauce. Along with the kabob came cukes, seeded, peeled, mushed, squooshed, fried, burnt, crumbled and mixed with honey. To drink, carrot/raspberry milk: very thin, juicy, with an egg, thick, with thick heavy cream and a teaspoon of bread dough, unsalted. For dessert, mildly pickled blueberry chocolate cakelettes. With a garnishing layer of skim milk, frozen on top, below, and in between. And as an after-dinner mint, peppermint/hamburger morsels soaked in cabbage water, stuffed with lemon Italian ice and 30% air. As a fortune cookie, egg-bagel cookies, cooked to a tight crisp and curled around central, edible messages of life. As the message, a wax paper/skim milk/maple candy substance inked with the blood of a Spanish typewriter ribbon and spiced with nutmeg and winter road slush. Thank God for the scallion truck.
--End of Chapter Two-- Why do we change the clocks twice a year? It's so dumb! I hate coming out of work when it's dark. Speaking of work, I have an interview after work today... If I get the job, then I won't be able to go on Millionaire! Oh well. Here's the autopsy report of that guy who hit Stephen King with his van. If Walker Evans had photographed a poultry book, you would get Depression Chicken. Very grim book from the 50's on ways to prepare your favorite bird. One more thing: Napster made the news again yesterday, saying that they're going to start charging for music. Who the hell cares? Who needs Napster? There are tons of other sites, like AV Find, that have the links up and running for you, free of charge. I guess mainstream media hasn't figured it out yet, and those who know are keeping their mouths shut. |
