This one was written by one of my friends and I felt that it just had to be shared.
Life's journey is full of emotions.
They run as deep as the oceans.
One guides their own life.
Searching to become complete.
Through the peril and strife.
To the future they meet.
Life and death, whos really to say?
Life can last years, but only a day.
It is important, to not go astray.
But on one's true path, must one stay?
To live life, in a special way?
When a person is found, one must cogitate.
The heart and the mind, they work as one.
And in the end, the thinking is done.
But theres one final thing, one must complate:
Is it by chance, or could it really be fate?
--- Meow1000 ---
It's been long since I blogged. Hey, I miss blogging too. But with exams, I had to choose between gaming or blogging. We all know what I choose. So today, I decided that since my exams are over, w00t, I am going to make a lo....ng... post. :D Brace yourself.
English Language
As everyone would know, English is very much my second language. Hence, I rarely use jargons, at least I try not to. Fortunately, I have a knack for making complicated things into simple layman term. I had always written in a very descriptive manner. The entries become like stories. Now that I've convinced you how simple my English is, its time to tell you why.
One fine day, an honest reader had e-mailed me. He said that my blog is readable and gave an honest suggestion on how to improve my blog readablilty. Like any typical diplomat,I said that I am flattered, thank you and I will keep it in mind. His reply was, his words weren't meant as complimentary and he finds my entry, (I believe that he refer's to it as my state of mind) is disturbing. My first reaction was ???? O_o o_O O_O ROTFLMFAO
My mind is a exactly what it is. A sane yet complicated one. I have problems with life and this blog keep track of it. Nothing more and nothing less. I am wild, funny, crazy, somewhat intelligent and serious at appropriate moments. I live my life and find everything to be very subjective. Every gesture, every movement in life counts. I keep track of them, I feel them and most importantly, I learn from them.
Now, does that disturb you? The fact that I can say what I like and no be ashamed of it? I have moments of joy, moments of sadnees, a splash of pain here and there. I have an active mind. It thinks and analyse. But I also have a sensitive heart. It feels deeply. Is that a mind of a disturbed person? I think its just a mind that lives life to its fullest. No, I am not too philosophical now days. I don't have time to write about it as this coming 2 years will be a somewhat busy year for me.
PC
In the office, I have a pc. Now that we've established that earth shaking fact, I can whine about how terrible it is. For the past few months or more, my pc cannot be accessed via the network. This is a hassle cause I have people doing work on my pc. It's annoying having to e-mail the documents back and forth. So today, the IT guy finally decided to do something about it. Typically when I do any troubleshooting, I tend to be very careful. Today was a big mistake.
He removed me from the network. And then restart the pc. What he forgot was to reset the admin's password. And the donkey that I am, I forgot to tell him :P Now I have a pc which holds all my stuff but I cannot access it. I just cannot log into the pc without a local ID and password. >_____< This is not good.
I have 2 e-mails to send and 1 project pending/late. I have numerous stuff that I need to work on using my pc. And the best was that it just had to happen in the morning. *cries* Now work is already over and my pc is still a useless junk. The IT man got an MC and left as soon as my pc crashed. *cries*
Exams
As far as the exam goes... I can say that it went.. ok. I don't want to dwell on it. Because harping over this will not make a difference to my results.
Work
I seem to deal badly with stress. When I have an exam looming and my boss decides to add pressure at the same time, it bodes ill for everyone. So I've been ill tempered as a wet cat for the past 1 month or so. Even my father and brother are beginning to complain. I tend to be caustic and sarcastic when I'm stressed. Especially when people try my patience. Worse, when they don't realise that I am too strung up to be able to answer retorical questions. I go, Duh! and annoy the heck out of people. Yes, I am sorry. It was very evil of me.
Games Nowdays, I spend hours and hours online. I am usually logged on mIRC hanging out with my fellow SOLers. I find them to be very interesting and best is, they don't judge me. We poke fun at each other and generally have fun. This weekend is WAR!!!! w00t!!!! *does the war dance* I want to kill those panks who dared to attack me back when I was an itty bitty country. Die you snivelling coward! *clears throat* I mean, I hope that I can do the best for my clan.
LOL! I am facinated by my new friends. They are not demanding. It makes me feel good to just be there and do whatever. And now I have younger ppl to fuss over. Gosh, I must really really like being an older sister.It rocks. And I have some of the other guys as a source of fun. And the girls to talk to about stuff(like plotting the creation of a harem of boys ;) ). I can be me without being expected to be act normal or mature :D
Wedding
My cousin got married two weeks ago. OMG, and she is younger then me. I can go on and on about how she looked and how her expression changed throughout the day, but I think its best not to. It was, as I said before an arranged marriage. I keep an open mind and hope that she will be happy.
Does this mean that I am betraying a fellow sister? No, it means that I have talked to her and talked about it. She is no ninny. She knows what she will have to go through. And she is willing to take a chance. As her father loves her very much, I don't think he was doing this to hurt her. He made checked this man's back ground thoroughly (He goes around like a CIA to dig dirt about this dude) and he came from a good family. Most importantly, they both are committed to this marriage. Kudos to them.
I guess that should be it for now. Any longer and I'll bore you :) Take care, gentle reader and see you later!
Love,
Julie.
So I...
[chorus]
I told myself that I would make some changes
But the more I change
There's one thing that remains the same
I can't seem to shake ya
You seem to really have a hold on me
And everytime that we break up
We turn around and make up
This can't go on now
I gotta move on now
It's not the fact that I don't love you no more
But, I gotta break this bad habit
Can't take this bad habit no more
I'm totally out of my element
Learnin' new ways to live
While you're in a comfort zone
Not even thinkin' (you couldn't think about me)
To call me, when I get mad, you buy me gifts
Thinkin' it's gonna solve every issue
From the girl callin' my phone
To the pictures that I saw (ya know I saw0
And everytime you would break up with me for nothing at all
I've taken all I can take (I've taken all I can take)
But, the way I live has gotta change, oh
[chorus]
Let me break it down
Have you ever loved somebody
So much, that you was just too blind to see
Past all of the pain they was causin' you (causin' you)
Ladies, do you feel me (do you feel me)
Have you ever loved somebody
So much that you went against the right thing that you should do
Oh, then it's time to make a change (time to make a change)
[chorus]
Once upon a time, not so long ago, I would have been tactful to everyone. I used to giving ppl the answers that they want to hear.
Today, I no longer do that. Firstly, because it takes a considerable amount of patience (which I don't have). Secondly, the tactic usually backfires when the mofo, uses my name to defend their pretty stupid idea/plans/stupidity. That will ruin my good name and is pretty counterproductive in life and my career. Thirdly, when I say nice things, they would go on and on about the whole idea/plan/stupidity which will only waste my time, which in turn tries my patience espcially when I am chasing after deadline.
Which brings up this question, aren't this ppl tired of leaning on me for support? I mean, sure I am supportive but when ppl become clingy, I feel like smacking them away and saying, "Away leaches. You energy vampire. Go and do your thing." Yes, sometimes when I do become unkind, my unkindness hurts the most.
Now I no longer waste time over petty matters. If you weren't there for me, the same applies vice-vesa. I ignore ppl who try to upset me. I look at life in a very cynical way. I'm sorry. I am very very tired of dealing with ass-wipes who finds joy in making my life difficult. I am tired, sleepy and cranky. And no, the doctor medication doesn't work. Relaxants only make me sleep and not want to wake up. Gah, must take multi-vites. PS: I became quiet in the office, my voice barely a whisper now. I wonder do they like what they make me do/be??
In all tiredness,
Julie
