Yesterday I called up Hani to ask her out. I need some distraction this weekend. But she didn't pick up the phone and I was worried enough to call her boyfriend, Tariq (as if he should know what she's doing la). After he told me that he has no idea where she is, I hung up. Almost a minute later, he called and said, "Excuse me, but who is this again, please." Such nice manners too.
"Tariq!!!!" I wailed. "I can't believe that you deleted my number. You @#$%! How dare you!!" The rest as they say is history. Later, I wondered, why should I expect my girl friend's boyfriend to know exactly what they are doing. I did the same with Tan and Yu San a couple of years back. Ditto with Maz and Farhan.
Anyway, I am eager for company tonight. I simply feel like meeting ppl and talking. Also, I want to forget things that's needs a time off. Plus I want to check out the dudes ^_^V So I set up a meeting with my cousin. Coolness. And made a date with Hani and T-boy.
The problem was where I should hangout. I wanted to go to Bangsar. It was my hangout spot 2 years back. But Hani violently disagree. "Julie, Bangsar had become tacky now days. Full of strange ppl who you don't want to associate with." My answer was a cheery, "Oh, Hani where would I be without you. Totally underbred and underclassed. I would be so uncultured and tacky." I didn't really mind hanging out else where while I wait for her. The problem was I had no way of getting to MK.
So I called my cousin and asked her to arrange for something or the other. I mean if I have to go dancing tonight, that's what I'll do. Ah, the joy of working hard is playing just as hard. Thankfully I'm very good at that.
Overall, I'd say this week has been a roller coster ride. Then again it's better then being dead :D I have to start work. Later!!!
Love,
Julie
I came to work cheerful despite the irritating fact that I have a dental appointment today :P Yes, Mazlina is still my dentist. She takes care of me and more importantly she understand's(or at least pretend to)my fear of dentist. So she is gentle. Hehe...
I spent the whole of last night cleaning up my room and putting away my clean clothes. I also did laundry and mop the floor. By 10 a.m. I am exhausted enough to sleep. Oh, let's not forget my playing pc game in between waiting. The bad new that resulted from the dust busting was that I woke up this morning with stuffy lungs. Bah, I hate it when that happened.
So this morning I woke up, and manage to find time for more moping and sweeping. I hate it when the job is not well done. So tedious. I must be very clean or else... Madness? Maybe... Anyway, there are times when I just suprise myself.
Am missing Az and CM, ok not really. I really miss Penang though. At least the good time we had. GTG, later!!!
Love,
Julie
MELODRAMMA
Pierpaolo Guerrini / Paolo Luciani
Questa mia canzone
Inno dell’amore
Te la canto adesso
Con il mio dolor
Così forte, così grande
che mi trafigge il cuor.
Ma limpido è il mattino
tra i campi odor di vino
Io ti sognavo e adesso
Ti vedo ancora lì
Ah, quanta nostalgia
Affresco di collina
Io pìango che pazzia
Fu andarsene poi via.
Questa melodia
Inno dell’amore
Te la canto e sento
Tutto il mio dolor
Così forte, così grande
che mi trafigge il cuor.
Ma limpido è il mattino
tra i campi un gran mulino
lì è nato il mio destino
amaro senza te…
amaro senza te.
E questo core canta
Un dolce melodramma
È l’inno dell’amor
Che canterò per te
È un melodramma che
Che canto senza te.
MELODRAMA
This song of mine
hymn of love
I sing to you now
with my pain
so strong so great
it stabs my heart
But the morning is clear
among the fields the scent of wine
I dreamt of you and now
I see you still there
Ah, what memories
fresco of hills
I cry what madness
it was to leave and go
This melody
hymn of love
I sing to you and feel
all my pain
so strong, so great
it stabs my heart.
But the morning is clear
among the fields a windmill rises
there my destiny was born
Bitter without you…
bitter without you
And this heart sings
a sweet melodrama
it’s the hymn of love
I’ll sing for you
It’s a melodrama
I sing without you
Today I sorta found out that I crashed and burned of my first solo flight. Well, I did take the chance and took that leap of faith. While I was sad last night, I woke up smiling. How strange, I didn't think that I'd be able to do that. I didn't think that I'd be able to face the company trip that was arranged today.
Instead, today I looked hot. I wore my red shirt and look very snazzy. I really look stylish. Nice.... I guess, the mild rejection didn't hurt me that badly. I have faith in myself. What a wonderful way to discover self confidance ^_^. Instead of berating myself over my 'imperfection', I accepted that our personality might not match. And it wasn't me or him, it was us that wasn't right.
Maybe, after this I'll not be afraid of relationships. No more hiding in my shell. I want to live life to its fullest. In actuallity, nothing is ever as bad as it seems. It's our perception that shape our world. That's why there are times when we see other people's situation and say, "That wasn't so bad."
Well, I just finished that company trip and its time to start work. Later!!!!
Love,
Julie
Last night I was as usual dispersing advice to my friend. I was forced to tell her the truth about life. I was forced to acknowladge the truth, that I was as scared of starting a relationship too. So after that I gritted my teeth and called CM for some advice about some man. I gathered my courage and leapt off the cliff. And surpisingly, it wasn't as painful as I thought it was going to be.
So ok, it wasn't stuff that dreams are made of, but it wasn't as nightmarish as I thought it was going to be. With enough practice, I can be good at this. Well, I'm going after what I want, if it works out, then that's great *gulp*. But if it doesn't, too damm bad.
I guess, this is as scared as I get. Strange, I never thought that I was going to do something as foolhandy as this. But I was caught between a rock and a hard place. I didn't want to let go but neither was I willing to make the first move. So I read all the prayers that I could think off and made the first move.
The irony doesn't escape me. Here we have a well spoken public speaker who have no fear of addressing public, who is quite well versed in social situations, and who interracts easily with perfect stranger, would feel so arkward and shy with someone that means the world to her. At least, for now he means the world to her. I lost count of meetings that I chaired, speeches I given and hostessing that I've done over the years. But when I face that someone, my vocab. and brain simply freezes.
I wrack my brain to find something to say. I can't seem to look him square in the eye. I felt.... shy. Ewwwwwww....... Why me??!!!*wails* Not now! I bet this is not even going to go anywhere. In the end, I'll just crawl back into my shell.
But until then, I can suck my guts in and put a lid on the panic alarm that goes blaring in my mind, telling me to hide because of the risk involved. OMG, I am so scared. I'm gutless but I want this so badly to happen. *sigh* I hate it when I become a complete girl :P
GTG. Later!!!
Love,
Julie
For the love of God, I couldn't stop that secret smile from gracing my face. Quite obviously that my mind is not in KL right now. In fact, I can't seem to get my mind to settle down. Today, I'm downright cheerful that it's scary. Unfortunately, that secret is for me to know and for you, dear reader to keep mum. Dad was scandalized to say the least. He keeps on muttering about needing to reprogram me. Hmmmm... *smirks*
Penang Trip
I left KL on a Thursday. After work (I had to attend a course in PJ of all things), I had to rush madly to catch the bus to Penang. The sad thing was that CM and I had seperate seats. I was in from and she was at the back. So, for almost the whole journey, I inclined my seat and turned around, clinging to the seat gossiping to her. I'm sure it was a tad strange, but what the heck, I've done stranger things. We arrived to Penang around 10.30p.m. Typical me, I over packed.
The next day, we went shopping. I bought a pair of sandals and a beautiful pink hair clip, very princess-ish. Later bought a few music CDs and found out that we were suppose to meet old classmates from martriculation center. My nitto, pet brother, was there and so I gladly went (I adore tyranting him). I was stunned, they were the same bunch I remembered from KMS.
We had drinks at Domes in one of the Mall (like I remember the name). Later one of the guys was nice enough to drive us around. He patiently waited for us while we browsed at the bazaar for pickled fruit. Later he sent us home and we went to get the car :D Az's sister was nice enough to lend us her car :D We drove around to find Penang Char Kwe Tiau that CM longed for. That night, we went driving to Padang Kota. Had supper and tea.
The next day was a bit havoc. We promised to meet at PMC to go to the wedding together. We got there on time but Ayub and Reza has yet to arrive. Rohaizi, Zafferina, her husband was already waiting. While waiting, I pounced on the available pool table. I begged for coins from CM and Az and we had a teaching game. I was teaching both CM and Zaf. Ayub and EG later displayed thair skills, making me wonder about the wild oats that they've been sowing in Dublin ;D
All three cars went to Balik Pulau to attend a classmate wedding. Hani was a beautiful bride. She simply looks stunning.
Aftert that we sent the car back to Az's sister's house. Reza and Ayob was nice enough to accompany us. Reza was nice enough to provide us with means of transportation back to Az's house. Due to CM's lust for laksa, we stopped at a place. They had laksa while I enjoyed bubur pulut hitam. It tasted great.
That night we went out with a group of friends at Batu Feringgi(sp). We meandered through the night market looking at trinkets and stuff. We had dinner and a lovely conversation. We left Penang on Sunday morning.
GTG, later!!!!
Love,
Julie.
