lordd its the DAEvil will yew luk at HEEM

Sun|06.09

I got no idears. Don't feel like goin to werk tomorry. Ohhhh but I'll go I'll go.

OH MAMA I M IN FEAR FOR MY LIFE FROM THE LONG ARM OF THE LAW

HANGMAN IS COMING DOWN FROM THE GALLOWS AND I DONT HAVE VERY LOOOONG

WOOOOOOOOOO

So my cat is next to me AS PER USUAL and I'm all, nothing to write but I FEEL like updating so what the hell, here ya go. NO PROBLEMO.

I hope I can sleep tonight. F'n heat.

dooby dooby doooooooo la-da-di-da-da dooby da-da-dada-da-yaaaaaa

Sat|06.08

I played a lot of Tetris at my last "permanent" temp job. My boss was a bit of a nut. She ran the center, but didn't know that much about word processing, and was cluelessly entertaining when trying to explain jobs to us.

She was under the impression that if someone else used my machine, he or she would have to sign on as me; if I tried to use Pootie's machine, that I had to log on as Pootie, and so on; so she assigned us passwords that everyone in the department knew, just in case we had to use their machines.

If you tried to tell her that anyone could log onto your machine with their own ID and password, and that in fact it was against policy to ask anyone for their password, you were being uncooperative. Weren't you a team player? Argue, and you were pretty much gone.

Pootie was also insane, but in a different way than our boss. Pootie had a false front tooth that he clicked in and out of its socket with his tongue as he listened to people speak. It was disconcerting. He was unaware of doing it, apparently, because when I asked him about it (subtly, I swear) he denied that he had a false tooth.

He made creepy sexual innuendos to me that grew worse when Bebe started working with us. She was, well, INSANE. In a similar way to Pootie in that they both said inappropriate things to people. But since our boss was the queen of inappropriateness, I grew to be the odd man out for having personal boundaries.

Bebe, on getting her nameplate: "I should put a naked picture of myself on it!" Ummmm.

When I had a stomach bug, Pootie and I had a conversation that disturbed me, somewhat due to content but mostly because he whispered every word to me while leaning way too close.

Pootie: Maybe you're pregnant.

Me: No, just sick.

Pootie: How do you know? You could be.

Me: Ummmmmm. No.

Pootie: Well you live with your boyfriend, right?

Me: Yes.

Pootie: So you could be pregnant.

Did I really need to discuss my birth control choices with freaky coworkers? I didn't think so, but I couldn't think of a way to get him away from me. I probably made a face and stared at my computer screen until he left. Who knows. Bleck.

He used to sleep under my desk when I was out, and I would come back and nearly kick him in the face, not knowing he was under there. He had statues of saints all over his desk. He and Bebe were endlessly flirting with each other in a way that turned my stomach.

MAN! I'm glad I don't work there anymore. Ew. Now I feel unclean.