Well, so I got my Printer Dock yesterday which fits perfectly into my carrying bag! But I am still waiting for my cam. If that stuff would just get here I would be ecstatic! I could start taking pics and e-mailing them or posting them. I'm dying here man! The delay in the shipping is cause my shipping addy and my billing addy are not the same, well duh I am in the military it is a luxury I don't get to choose. My bank doesn't accept multiple address recognition. Basically one address to one card. Sucks ass.

Well on a good note. I made a new friend yesterday/today. Ruano introduced us, and she is so fucking cool! She is like female psycho soul-mate friend type! Which for me is kind of rare cause I rarely get along with females in real life (it is much easier on the net hehe). The 3 of us hung out and I had the most fun I have had in a long time, (considering I really haven't left 29palms in almost 9 months heehee). I suddenly started feeling better, really..I almost felt like a care-free civilian again..like I had grasped a small taste of freedom. I forgot what that felt like. Now I want it all the time! I can't stand being in my room like I used to..must..have..freedom! I wish I could have gone to hang out with her today but Ruano is my only ride and he has to work tomorrow (that and we spent tons of money yesterday). Yeah we need to recoup!

On a bad note though, after all the fun I had I come back home to this dead base, and upon entering my room I realize one of my fish is dead. The Algea eater was bleach white and floating. The other fish were fine, so were the frogs, but my Algea Eater kicked the bucket. I was heart-broken..but I flushed him down the toilet with a little prayer in the process.

Over-all weighing it out I can't really tell if it was a good or bad day in the end. It had it's moments of each..I guess.

Saturday, June 26, 2004
11:07 p.m.

Augh..the only thing I hate..the ONLY thing I hate about buying stuff online is the wait period (I kinda hate the S+H charges too augh..). I love the convenience of going to a store, buying something and going straight home to use it..meanwhile online you have to sweat it out until it ships. I WANT MY DIGICAM! I want to fiddle with it and takes pics with it. OH! I got a sweet deal too! Cause my buddy Ruano said he would let me upload my pics on his comp if I helped him with his website...schweet! So maybe I WILL be able to share my pics online. Erg I prob wont be taking personal pics of myself cause I am not photogenic and I believe the camera steals my soul @_@. I want to go home, and I want my cam.

Oooh I was livid today cause I so got degraded at work today. I shall now rant about it. Ready?

OK, so this is the story. I go into work, there are 3 post-partum patients, 4 outpatients and one laboring. OK Ruano gets the laboring. Fernando gets the 3 posties and I get the outpatients. BUT here is the kicker, two of Fernando's babies were sick, so I felt it wasn't fair that she had to deal with two sick babies and then one cruise control couplet. So I volunteered to take the couplet in room 7, so she could deal with the two sick babies rather than 3. Now, Amy is our LVN, who's only job on the ward is outpatients. There were only 4 outpatients, you have to be a LAZY mofo not to be able to handle 4 outpatients that are about 30min-1hour apart from each other. The worst part is Amy is a fucking pig who doesn't know how to restock or clean up after her patients. So they start coming in and I start checking them in which means Amy gets more time to sit on her fat ass. Well soon all the outpatients are seen. I take room 7 with the orientee Eberle (so I am kinda teaching her stuff as she follows me around), a lady comes in and she gets admitted, so since Fernando has two patients, Ruano has one in active labor, I get the new admit and Eberle of course is still following.

Here comes the desmadre, our bitch of an LPO and her fucking side-kick ALPO decide that I am "fresh out of orientation" so therefore I can't be teaching an orientee how to do stuff. FRESH OUT OF ORIENTATION?!?! I have been 6 months off orientation already!! Half a freaking year! As if the two bitches plotting against me isn't bad enough, they decide to further insult me by having the ALPO come into the patient's room and tell me "We need you outside" Then she says she is gonna take over my patients and train Eberle, so I have to take outpatients. OUTPATIENTS? WHAT F-ING OUTPATIENTS? By that time they had all been seen! Besides, Eberle did not need any further post-partum training, so The ALPO and her could have done the delivery and just let me handle the postie. No instead I am sitting on my ass, looking like a lazy bum while the ALPO takes over my patients. Worst part is when the laboring lady rang her call bell, ALPO was nowhere to be found. YOU NEVER LEAVE A LABORING PATIENT! So after 4 rings I got off my butt and I go in the room and I end up helping her to the bathroom, bringing her a heating pad and then taking vitals..all things that should have been done by her freaking ALPO corpsman.

IF she wanted to take my patient so damn bad SHE SHOULD F-ING BE THERE FOR HER. Instead I end up picking up her slack, I should have just kept the damn patient if I was gonna end up doing the work for her!

Now here is the kicker! ALPO and LPO's schedule is only 8 hours compared to our 13 hours..so come 2-3 o'clock they are heading home. So when ALPO leaves who do you think they got to take over the patient? ME! They said "You are taking over room 7 and room 2. Alpo's Patients." ALPO's patients!?!? They should have just let me have them. What was the big deal between letting me work with Eberle 12 hours as opposed to letting me work with her for 3, then cutting me off and then giving her back for the remaining 4 hours? S-T-U-P-I-D-I-T-Y!

On top of that tomorrow is my day off and I have the mock PRT to go to at 0530. Then the uniform re-inspection which I am the ONLY one who has to go to it (even though my uniform wasn't half as bad as the others, at least I ironed mine that morning meanwhile everyone else just keeps it in their freaking locker). Then I have barracks clean-up at 1630..omg it's gonna be one hell of a day off -_- by the time I am done with all that I will be ready to go to bed.

AUGH I'm tired of bitching now..it just pisses me off severly when I think about how much I am mistreated in that fucking ward. Then they wonder why I have no motivation to work there and why I am always so damn bitter. And ALPO can go ahead and say something to my face once in a while..see what happens to that bitch >:0...nooooo she always says it to someone else BUT me..I swear I'll pound her! Fuck the uniform I will take off my ribbons and throw down. Anytime! Bring it on! !)_&*^&#*^@$%!+^!!!

There goes my sanity...I need to take my chill pill (aka Lexapro) I don't think it's helping my anger problem do you? HAHAHAHAHA. Well gotta go..I need to go beat someone up now..

Thursday, June 24, 2004
09:02 p.m.

BLAHAHAHA I just bought a new Digicam and it's printing dock on the net *_* woot! It all came out to about $500+ but it is so worth it cause I have been dying to take pics of some of the stuff I seen (especially the animals, noone would believe me) unfortunately since I don't have a comp of my own or any imaging programs I wont be able to share em on the net untill I get my own comp someday (gotta stop spending so much money first..yeah right!)...but yeah I am thrilled..I can't wait till this stuff gets here! Umm I just got back from Mando and buying my stuff online..I need to go take a shower ^^;;

Monday, June 21, 2004
09:11 a.m.

Oooh it's been a few days or something. Well that's because I transitioned from working nights to days now..and on a weekend no less! So my sleeping schedule is upside down now, I have to face the sun now..

..omg whoever said that exercise gives you energy needs to be hung by their toes. I have been going to Mando 3 times a week, where we exercise anywhere from 30min to an hour and I feel more tired and week than I ever have in my life! I used to be able to do 30+ push-ups without a prob and 57+ sit ups when I was SEDENTARY. Now that I am doing this weekly exercise thing I can barely do 10 push ups and 10 sit ups OMG *gets a gun*. So yeah I am very mad..and noone believes me!

Oh speaking of sun! I got sunburned ;_; I went hiking like usual in the middle of the desert. I left the barracks at 0800 and meant to be back by 1000 or so. Well I put on my sunblock, went out, had a good walk, saw the cutest little chipmunks in the world, then on my happy stroll back I see this big white lizard under a bush. Naturally I love lizards and it has been my mission during my stay in this hell hole to catch one so I may squeeze it and give it lots of kisses. Anyway, so here is this beautiful lizard and the best part is since it was in the shade cooling off it was kinda sluggish, not as fast as they usually are. Easy to catch right?

NO! The little beast made a complete fool out of human intelligence. The little guy would run from buch to prickly bush and if I went to one side it would go around to the other. I tried using sticks to prod it out and it just ran circles around me like it was cool.

So here I am chasing this cute lizard all over the freaking mojave desert and finally just when I get my hands on it, it starts to wiggle crazy-like and in fear of snapping it's little spine I loosen my grip on it to rearrange my hands and the little fuck runs under another bush. This time though it finds a scorpion hole and dissapears!

So all upset, tired and sweaty I look at my watch and it is all of a sudden 1200! The sun was high in the sky and my skin suddenly felt painful. I realized my sunblock wore off and I was being baked while I chased the reptile. That lizard must have been laughing it's freaking head off in that hole.

Well lucky for me the sunburn wasn't too bad. It would take more than 5 hours in the sun to really kill me and I got a nice tan out of it. My neck is still a little tender but the rest of me is just fine ^_^..I will catch that damn lizard if it is the last thing I do..and then I shall give it kisses and pet it till I am satisfied.

God I need a pet...well I have fish, I love them to death (especially my Beta cause I rescued her from near death) but I can't give them kisses.

My leave has not been approved yet but I am going home anyway. I am excited cause soon enough I will be at Otakon getting my anime/manga/fangirl fix. I'm starting to doubt the Anna cosplay now just cause I wont have enough time to prepare..arg.

OMG I AM CURSED! I just realized I have the ability to make babies sick hahaha. Friday I come into work, they give me a patient in room 7. The baby girl had been born with vitals stable throughout transition. Perfect. The minute I take over and o my first assessment I notice that the baby has low respirations. So of course I tell my nurse. She comes in and now she is finding a low Heart rate too. So all night we continously come in and assess this baby. By the end of the night I am taking vitals q1 instead of the normal q4. Baby gets cultures done, O2 Sats, Blood draws..the whole nine yards. That afternoon I get off after my 13 hour shift and this morning I come back and what do they tell me? The minute days shift left, the baby got better O_o. Sure enough I get the same patient and baby is all of a sudden stable. WTF?!?!

OK so that couplet gets discharged. I get room 4 this time. All night baby boy has been doing great. The minute I do my first assessment I notice the baby's respirations are through the roof. Up to the 80's and 90's. So I ask the father if he noticed rapid breathing earlier and he says it only just started about 10 minnutes ago. I tell the nurse, she comes to assess the baby and now she has respers in the 100's. OMG this baby gets the full work up too and ends up on q1 vitals!! AGAIN!!! Totally different baby, different gender, different gestational age even and he ends up sick! I am cursed. Now if I go back to work tomorrow and all of sudden room 4 is just fine I WILL GO INSANE!

Augh enough about work it drives me crazy. I did get some nice soup though. Oh and my friend brought in some treats from the phillipines! OMG one thing she brought in was a weird powder type thing with young rice IT WAS SO FREAKING GOOD! Fattening but GOOD! It reminded me about Mazapan (if anyone knows what that is I'll love ya!). Oh and honey dipped bananas, and dried mangos, tamarind, pineapples. It was heavnely. I only ate one of each though or else I'd binge big time hahaha. I'm trying real hard to keep my weight..it's too easy to gain weight around here. My poor friend who used to be skinnier than me looks like a cow now..really she does! It's sad. Each time she jokes around and tells me she is pregnant I feel compelled to believe her >_< uuuuuf.

K, well I gotta get to bed now cause I have to get up tomorrow again at 0500 like always..arg..day shift sucks donkey balls! Enjoy your lives you poor 9 to 5 bastards! I enbi juuuu!

Saturday, June 19, 2004
07:53 p.m.

So I finally got an e-mail from my boyfriend in Iraq -_- and he's basically going on his usual shit of "Sorry I haven't written but it seems everytime I do you are too busy to talk or just don't care"..whatever I am tired of dating children with guns. That's what he is! Call me heartless or whatever, I know he's out there on the field with his Marines and what not, but where has he been for these past months when I've been in supreme mental anguish??

Augh he knows I am not having the best time here and I'm trying really hard to keep my sanity and he has to play these bullshit games. He calls me at work granted it's all the way from Iraq but he waits till I am at work to call cause he knows I'll be there (rather than my cell phone I hardly answer) but he also KNOWS that I get stressed out and cranky at work, so what does he expect when he calls, for me to be like "Hi honey how is your day?" while chaos explodes around me? My Ass!

And then he has the audacity to write my mortal enemy Morris nearly every other day..but wait for me to write him? I WAS the last one to write him. I was probably the only one who even remembered his birthday. "Sorry I haven't written.." you BETTER be Sorry!? Cause he said it himself "I haven't written" which means I have and it was obviously a sorry waste of time cause he has more fun talking to Morris..well he can DATE Morris for all I fucking care! @)$&@(*#^@#)(*#

YES! I am cruel..don't expect me to give assholes pity just cause they are in Iraq..an asshole is an asshole no matter what part of the world they are in or whether or not they are shooting guns or sitting behind a comp screen like my ass..augh!

YES! I am a bitch..and if you don't like it..go to HELL. I'm tired of stupid people, and it seems that everyone on the west coast is BACKWARDS in their way of thinking. Seriously..it's scary. I used to say the more west I went from The East coast the nicer people got..which is true. But they also got more PSYCHO and I am turning into them! I prefer the steady but honest meaness of east coast people than the friendly but extremely duplicit nonsense of the west coast people.

OMG I neeeeeed to go HOME! This desert is baking my brain! I want..Lucuma ice cream under the foliage of REAL trees in the sweltering humid sun. A cool swig of Malta in the mosquito-laden night as the cicadas lull me to a stupor....ah...home.

Can you tell I'm at work? Hahahaha..I'm gonna go draw or something..

Monday, June 14, 2004
10:49 p.m.

It is 5 am and I am wide awake..aahhh! I should go eat something, I am hungry.

I missed seeing Kill Bill2 in the free movie theater today I am so miffed about that cause it was the last showing they were gonna have of it. I need to fix my sleeping clock cause this is killing meeee! I am currently doing laundry and in a few hours I will trek for a few miles to go to the comissary and buy FOOD! YES FOOD! BWahahaha..

I was lying in bed today looking at the ceiling and I started to drift off I had a really weird dream that I will NOT discuss on this thing heeheehee. But I do remember the song "Do I ever Cross your mind?" by Brian McKnight running through my head and I woke up and I thought for a long time as I layed there in my beautifully dark and warm room, half nekkid (cause that's how I like to sleep, it's the desert people) about all the guys I've ever been with and I remember smiling and thinking of the only guy who has ever broken my heart in my [insert number] years of existance.

I wonder where he is and what he is doing. The last thing I heard of him he had hooked up with some smoker chick back home and was happy painting boats @_@. Sometimes I think about that crack head and I wonder if I could have stayed faithful to him (I cheat on all my boyfriends..just a habit now, I always meet great people when I'm already with someone). Sometimes I think I would have been his for a long long time if he had wanted me to. Dumbass went and got himself discharged instead, promised he'd call (even though I knew I would never hear from him again) and disappeared.

Hmm..I never really forget a person, especially one I cared about. I remember each and every one of my boyfriends, lovers, friends..sometimes names escape me but their essence doesn't. I'm a hopeless romantic looking for love but not for eternity..I guess. I don't think I have ever fallen in love..then again I don't believe in it (that or monogamy)..so I dunno. I think the day I fall in love is the day I think I can't live without someone..that day has not come yet. Unless it's Gackt, cause he is my future husband he just doesn't know it yet. LOL.

On an annoying note, I think I'm gonna have to go back to my old evil ways and start my voodoo crap again. The HM2 who has dedicated his life to making my Mando PT in the mornings living hell, will regret the day he was born and if my curse does not affect him it will definitely affect his future generations if he doesn't LEAVE ME THE FUCK ALONE! AUGH BASTARD! He makes me run his freakin mile and a half without stopping even though everyone else is walking and he KNOWS I am a swimmer, NOT a runner..my freaking stress fractures DO NOT LIKE SHOCK! AUGH!)(*)@(&$(*^@^%*&%!..so yeah now I have to go and curse him. It really is annoying the trouble I have to go through..why can't people just play nice instead of having me make their life miserable? (and of course I risk the chance of it backfiring at me in some way and therefore the tiny threat that I might make my own life miserable in the process). Blarg..I shall see how it goes monday morning..if he pisses me off though he'll regret it. Can someone just spare me the effort and break his legs or something? I'd appreciate it -_-.

Well I'm gonna go check my laundry and watch a movie..eat something.. then stay awake some more. Ja!

Sunday, June 13, 2004
04:37 a.m.

[Luciara/Rafael]

BORED! Somebody shoot me and put me out of my misery ;_;..augh. work sucks! 3 hours till shift is over and then I have the whole weekend to myself..yay -_-..anyhow I did get drawing time in (which I'm not supposed to). Just Orikara's this time around. The first one is my character from my story Sayonara Ai, the little delinquent Nueve with the chibi angel/demon..the black and white picture under that are my characters from Fallen Angel, the Dark Angel Luciara and the White Angel Rafael. ^_^..yeah maybe someday I will get a chance to let you all in on my original stories that may one day turn into manga (if I ever get around to it).

Friday, June 11, 2004
03:04 a.m.

OK I luv the manga Alice 19th, it's cute so far and the sibling rivalry and all that is cute but seriously..

[Does she look like Sakura Kinomoto in Eriol-type clothes or what?]

Seriously the resemblance of an older Sakura is uncanny, with only slightly flatter hair, even the costume on the cover is somewhat reminiscent of Sakura's new [Look] in Tsubasa.

OH well..what I really wanted to mention is I recently got the Tank for Negima! and it's really cute! I love the artwork, it's just my sort of style with bold lining and shades! I love the rivalry between the Junior High Girls and the High School girls with comments like "Babies!", "Old Hags!" LOL.
The whole Asuna/Negi situation is SO cute, but I find it kind of weird that a 10 yr old kid is thrown into all these 'adult' type situations..I mean how many times can he sneeze a girl's clothes off without getting a bloody nose. This kid sees more action than any other manga/anime character I know. Yep this is definitely Love Hina reminiscent.
The whole reason I even tried this manga out was because I kept hearing it was a cross between Harry Potter and Love Hina. AND IT IS! Negi is SO adorable but sometimes you just want to strangle him lol. He even mentions Quidditch in one panel lol it's so funny. Magus resembles Dumbledore and the words on Negi's diploma mysteriously appeared kinda like Riddle's words mysteriously appread in the journal. Also he rides around on his Magic Staff, much like our Potter wizards ride on their brooms. But this manga is still very different. It's funny and just worth checking out. I've never chuckled out loud so many times. I think I'll actually follow this series!

I got my Utena Doujin today! It has Tsuwabuki/Nanami and Mikage/Mamiya content. Nothing hard-core though but still beautiful artwork so I love it! (two of my fave pairings!)

Well gotta go, I'm @ work and am not supposed to be having fun.

Thursday, June 10, 2004
10:00 p.m.

AAAHHH HELP! I AM SO BORED! I am at work right now, stuck with a baby that keeps on spitting up it seems every 10 minutes, you have no idea how many blankets I've gone through with this demon spawn..augh it stinks like amniotic fluid and formula *dies*..well on a good note I was soooo bored that to entertain myself of course I went to the oekaki board and drew a piccy. This time it's Anna wound up with her beads. I like Anna..she's evil ^^ well not really but she's tough as nails. I like her with Yoh, Hao, Tamao and sometimes even Pilika. Erg I also have this morbid thing with her and Manta bwahahaha..but only cause he's her lil bitch! I luv Anna ^^

Thursday, June 10, 2004
02:33 a.m.

I love going to this site, it helps to feed my addiction to this thing. If you love FF7 then you have got to be as excited as I am about this, seeing the characters get upgraded is awesome..I can't wait to know more of the plot too.

Hmmm and is it just me or does this new verison of Cloud look a lot like Gackt in his spiky blonde days?...nummy...

Wednesday, June 9, 2004
08:55 p.m.

Your an ice dragon! Congrats! Out of all the dragons, you are most powerful but do not like to show it. A rare and special creature, you have artistic style and are great at expressing yourself. You think friends and Familly are the most important, and are a hopeless romantic. But of course, as ice goes, you can be a little cold or harsh at times. But not to worry, you always apoligize later!

What elemental dragon are you?

Now this is really odd cause even if the description makes sense I am actually not fond of the cold at all. I like warm weather environments but not exactly tropical or desert..weird.

BTW does it irk anyone else when it comes to spelling or simple grammar stuff? For example everytime I see one of these banners with "Your" instead or "You're", it kills me. Your pertains to something of belonging..You're is short for You are, which means being...augh...and then people argue when they say americans aren't dumb..watch "Street Smarts" and shake your head in shame like I do to be an 'average american' augh..*pukes*

Wednesday, June 9, 2004
04:29 a.m.

OK so I have been buying stuff to go home on leave (even though my chit hasn't been approved yet but I'm gonna go whether they do or don't hahahaha)..err and it is getting expensive..so I am very very glad that I'm rich! Well no not really, but I have more than enough to cover all the expenses I just never knew how much it would take just to go home and then attend one event..I haven't even included the cost of going to the actual con yet @_@..so far with the flight home and the hotel I am at about $1000..then the con ticket and the train ticket and all the stuff I am gonna binge spend on..OMG I am gonna spend money like crazy!I'm so excited! There's is nothing I love more than spending my hard earned money!!!! WOOT!

On a bad note I dunno if I mentioned that the master chief basically told me that there was no way in hell I could get out..so now i am down to some very bad choices that I must discuss with my family cause the thought of staying in the Navy for 4 more years is enough to drive me insane..yep and there is no way in hell I am willing to do that. So I have a lot to think about but before that I am gonna concentrate on all the things I have to do before I go on leave *_* woot!

Yeah I picked up my package at the hosp today and I was right! It was my Shaman King Doujin ^^ I am so happy with em they are thick high quality books with cute shonen-ai stories in it and some het..all beautiful artwork too! Love it..I wish they had more of the couplings I love though *shrug* oh well I got two more doujin on the way..just gotta wait for em.

Wednesday, June 9, 2004
03:30 a.m.

What swear word are you?

AHA-AHAHAHA-HAHAHAHA! I LOVE these things! Do they know me or what!?!?!? HUH? HUH?

Tuesday, June 8, 2004
12:34 a.m.

Hmmm I just cooked some gnocchi. I remember this stuff being really good when I ate it at a restaurant a long time ago..but this stuff was the packaged kind. It didn't turn out as good as I remembered it being. Oh well maybe the restaurant hand makes it's stuff, who knows. At least the Barilla pasta sauce was good! I'm thirsty now....

Just for Fun!

You are Anna kyouyama. You are a scary, harsh and
strong girl. You're very good at hiding your
feelings though, cos nobody knows the real you
until they know your true personality. It seems
that you like to use a mask on your face but
you're fluky enough cos you meet your savior.
Sometimes, you can be sweet and caring, but
still you're too cruel as a girl. Try to be
nice to people.

Which Shaman King character are you?

*fufufufufufuf* DO they know me or what? Hahahaha, I'm really not THAT scary..ok who am I kidding? YES I AM!! hahahaha!

Monday, June 7, 2004
11:58 p.m.

OMG yesterday was a long day at work, I finally got today off though. The fucked up thing about yesterday is we were assigned the same patients, but this one chick got to go home early and I was left to cover for her patient..which is fucked up cause I have never been allowed to dump a patient on someone else and leave early. And the day before when they were watching movies I picked up all their slack by tending to both patients, which weren't even mine. To top it off, I have seniority over this chick so if anyone should have gotten the chance to go home it should have been me cause not only am I senior but I didn't have any patients that night..it's bullshit. I have been working 8 months at that god-forsaken ward and not once have I ever taken special lib to go home early. Fuck this, this is why I hope they grant my leave coming in July so I can get the fuck out of here for a few days...oh yeah to top it all off I had to do everything that night. Take down trash and linen all by myself and that shit is hard when you are on a time limit, I had mando to go to. It was HELL..but at least now I get to rest and flip everyone off.

On a good note, if I am approved for leave at the end of July I might be able to go to OTAKON! I am so excited since the last time I went was in 2002 or something..I don't even remember. I'm gonna look online and find stuff to cosplay as Anna from Shaman King like I meant to do years ago ^^ I just need to find the dress (I can't sew for shit even if it is something that simple) I got the necklace, the shoes and everything else ready..just need that god forsaken dress! Woot! My hair is the right length, just gotta dye it a little lighter and I am all set! Now the only thing to worry about is that $500 room >.< augh!

Wish me luck people!!

Ohh! I have a package waiting for me at the hospital I think it's the rest of my Shaman King Doujinshi *_* I am so excited! *drool*..I can't wait to go pick it up!

Monday, June 7, 2004
11:01 p.m.

Umm ok so I am at work again, and shift is about to end..but the whole night I had no patients except for one..it was a waste of time staying here all night. Augh..but the only good thing was I got to draw while the others watched movies. So I got a scribble done. Again, on PSP with the stupid mouse they have here..god I miss my tablet it is way more versatile. Well it's better than nothing and hopefully I can get a few more pics in before the evaluation on the program thing runs out (I would try a crack except for this is a govy comp). It's Damien and Endel my orikara's from my manga "Death on Arrival". Well...gotta go.

Sunday, June 6, 2004
06:14 a.m.

OMG I feel SO out of the loop, lately I have been going around just reading random blogs of people who enjoy anime like I do..and I realized that it's really really been a long time since I was anywhere close to civilization! Did you know I haven't watched TV in almost an entire year? I'm amazed just when I watch commercials at work in the fleeting moments that I entr a patient's room and they are watching tv. I'M SO DEPRIVED! OMG..I'm reading stuff on shows like Witch Hunter Robin, Full Metal Alchemist, Matantei Loki..augh! I know nothing of these shows and yet lots of people are raving about them..AUGH. A long time ago I would have been one of the first to get a glimpse of these shows ;_; I would have been watching them raw as they came out like I did with Shaman King and Fruits Basket *wails*..I NEED TO GO HOME..I sorely miss my old stupid computer back home that I affectionately call "POS".

OK enough of that rant. I was reading over my XXXHolic manga again from pure boredom and I realized a few things. Why is Sakura's wand even in the first volume if Tsubasa supposedly has nothing to do with the CCS storyline. Then Yuko talks about the 'creep' magician she knew for a long long time, so of course she is talking about Clow. Since both Clow being an old magician from the past and the wand being used with cards (whom she said belonged to the cute girl that was 'coming soon') could it be that Tsubasa will somehow end up in a CCS-like storyline? Or is she merely reffering to the theory that a different version of ourselves exists in alternate plains? it's weird. I love how CLAMP connects little bits and peices of every series though in both XXXHolic and Tsubasa(which I haven't read just cause I can't bear everyone being so different, and there are no signs of Eriol, who happens to look a hell of a lot like Watanuki). Oh well many things to think about and no time to seek the answers ahhh! *shoots self*

I'm at work while I write this btw, shift is about to end (yay maybe I can get out in 12 hours isntead of 13 this time!)..so I gotta go, they'll kick me off soon.

Saturday, June 5, 2004
06:09 a.m.

All I have to say is...damn! And if you don't know who this is you need to be shot!

Friday, June 4, 2004
07:24 a.m.

hmm so what am I doing still awake..well it seems that i totally went on a fanlisting binge. Also Since I work nights I am usually awake in the Am hours..in fact I have to work tomorrow..all weekend actually >.< Gods that's 13 hour shifts for 3 days straight..somebody put me out of my misery. Do you know what it's like to be in one place for 13 hours with women who are bleeding out of their private parts and babies who wont stop crying..OMG. I don't wish Labor and Delivery on anyone..especially not in the middle of nowhere California Desert!!! *looks for a rattle snake to end her miserable life*...ummm so anyway to make myself happy despite this daunting reality coming up, I am spending money ^^ yep I decided tonight I will order some more movies to watch since that's all i ever do anymore.

Speaking of movies Harry Potter comes out tomorrow! OMG I want to see it so bad, but the nearest movie theater here is in another city..I need a ride! *wants to buy Vespa even more*..arrrggg I will have to wait to see it when it comes out in our free movie theater thingy on base..damn it that will be weeks..months even! *cries* I've been dying to see this damn thing for a year *even if some things about it make me upset already just from the previews*. Still at least I can see the reviews for it right?

Blarg I missed Mando PT this morning I wonder why I was so tired..hmm..well I have to go tomorrow morning anyway which means I have to leave by about 0445 to get there by 0530..blarg. Well better get going I still have laundry cooking!

Friday, June 4, 2004
01:56 a.m.

Ooohhh Ahhhhh! OK So I watched Moon Child Last night. It was great! God I love international films ^_^..I would so totally write spoilers about it but I wont. Instead I will write about a few things that confused me about the movie, for those who know about it, you will know what I mean. One was why did Kei leave the group after Toshi's death? Was it remorse for what happened? I mean he killed the guy who killed Toshi for both revenge and feeding right? Also, Kei avoided the police for ages, so why was it that 9 years after Toshi's death he gets caught and is sentenced to death row. Was it cause he was giving up on life? Was it his way to atone for the things he did? cause if he really wanted to die he could have just gone to the beach and let the sun rise. Another question, why did Kei do for Shou what he refused to do for Yi-Che? Was her love for him just one sided? Or did he love her back but couldn't show it cause she was married to Shou? Also why was Chan killed by his own henchmen..he was the antagonist to our heroes but he didn't seem like a bad guy, he was trying to better his neighborhood for his people, I didn't see him as such a bad guy except for he got in Shou's way. It was an awesome movie, Hyde and Gackt were superb, they can act ^^ well the crying scenes always seem kind of fake to me but that's only cause I know it's not real. My critical ass always looks out for things like that. The movie was packed with gun-fights, and melodrama..I LOVE MELODRAMA, combine that with violence and vampires and you know I will love it! The thing that impressed me more was the subtle stuff, it was striking. The pain Yi-Che must have gone through to see her brother and Shou fight. The pain Shou must have lived with knowing Yi-Che loved Kei, and then withdrawing from his daughter's life to let Kei raise her. Kei's sad little song that he hummed now and then. Kei not being able to go to Yi-Che's celebration in the daylight. The little tin can that they collected money in as boys. Those tiny elements were just beautiful, I recommend this movie to anyone who loves foreign films and who wants to see Gackt or Hyde's acting talent.

Thursday, June 3, 2004
07:29 p.m.

Ok so I am still in the process of customizing this thing how I want it, but considering my limitations on this stupid base I might not be able to do all the neat things I used to. I miss my websites and the day I get out of this hell-hole military thing I will definitely go back to working on them.

Oh! The layout top pic was made by me of course. It's an orikara of mine. I was able to download PSP on one of the comps here without restrictions, and spent some time at work working on it. The program is only on evaluation though so pretty soon I will run out of time to play with it and then I'll be back to uh, nothing for the time being.

Hahaha This is funny! I found my old [guestbook] from my old sites, it's still working too, uh don't bother signing it since the links at the bottom are dead links >_<..ah but it does bring back some memories!

Yeah so it turns out that since I live in the middle of nowhere I have taken to shopping online, I live at Amazon.com normally..but lately I have become the Queen of Ebay. I simply love the bidding thing, it's riveting and since I have no life it is very easy for me to watch a bid until the very end of auction so that nobody beats me. Yep if you go up against ooCharlatan999oo people, you WILL lose (don't even try to bid it would be a waste of time for you)..I got lots of money to spend and lots of time to outbid you hahahaha. Sadly I have never lost an auction so far ^^ Most expensive item was only $40 woot!

Vespausa.com makes me drool..I want one I want one! I WILL have one..it's only about $2000 or so..not bad. The only thing hindering me is that sadly I LIVE IN THE MIDDLE OF NOWHERE..the nearest dealer is 70 miles away and I have noone willing to take me out there...I am stuckkkkkk..but I WILL have one, one way or another.

Well I will write more when I get the time for now I'm gonna watch the new DVD I got today, Moon Child OMG I'm so excited..Gackt and Hyde on the same screen? *Melts* So yeah gotta go!

Thursday, June 3, 2004
12:40 a.m.