innercity life
Wednesday, August 2, 2006 07:44 p.m.

I'm starting to get used to living in the city. It's expensive, it's hot, there are loads of people and still it can feel like the loneliest place in the world.

Work has been extremely stressful as of late...but I think the rest of the week should be ok since we cranked it into overdrive at the beginning of the week. Lord, I need a break. But I think I'm going to be grateful to just have a job and I'll just keep doing what I need to do.

Monday night: Went over to Stef's and checked out her place. We ordered in sushi and sat on the roof..I was the first dinner date she ever had up there...so it was a good thing for her to be doing new things. Nice space once she gets it furnished. Had a good heart to heart with her...and I guess we understand each other on a different level since we've had some similar experiences.

Tuesday night: Went to a local bar with Sofia and had a couple of drinks and checked out her place. A lot of hitting. She's one of those types of girls I suppose.

Not much else going on since the heat wave set in...today was supposed to be the worst of it...but since I was indoors most of the time...it wasn't too bad.

I think I stole some laundry detergent though. I went to do laundry in the building and there was this near empty box...I took like a quarter scoop thinking it was either the building's or someone's garbage...but thinking now...what the heck...it must have been the tiredness and heat making me think crazy logic...arrrgh! I'm sorry! What the heck was I thinking?

Anyways, one more night in the city and then I'm off to Boston. TOOL tix on sale Saturday! Must get them this time!!!!!

Hot in the City
Monday, July 31, 2006 04:08 p.m.

Woke up kinda late on Sunday...just went to Best Buy and walked around a bit. Not too hot...but enough to get me tired and sweaty. And the fact that fire alarms keep going off in the apartment...well, not making me happy.

Had dinner with Gloria and Joe at L'annam...the food was ok [NOTE THE EDIT: I got a message from Gloria and she said "I just check your blog...and now you are on my shit list. HAHAHAHH! You KNOW I love me some Gloria...the "food was ok"...hence the change. I was just talking to Doris last week and mentioned that Gloria has the best boobs out of anyone I know...so that must count for something? ...like a slap upside the head.] ...and just strolled around the city and made it back for HBO stuffies.

Woke up at 630 to the sound of the fire alarm. Looks like they have a bunch of false alarms going on over there. And again an hour later...but I was up at 8, showered, had half a donut, and was out by 830...and was at work at 9. WOW. I love this.

Work...and more work. Feeling kinda dizzy...maybe because I went over to W4th to take a walk...and lots of stuff has changed over there...it's weird. Anyways, not feeling all that great.

IMed a bit with Lucia...and found out a bit about what's going on. I actually miss that nerdy rascal.

Dinner and drinks with Stef later tonight in the UES...and I can stay out as late as I want...since I just have to roll out of bed at like 815 and be here on time. WOOOO. City life is awesome...even though there are moments when you feel all alone even on a crowded street.

Ok...weird anime thingee...hot new series called "Trinity Blood"...looks awesome. The main characters' names "Abel" and "E"...yup...that "E"...how weird is that?

Gonna be a scorching few days...but D K has some nice AC going on...ahhh luxury.

Advetures in Housesitting
Saturday, July 29, 2006 07:31 p.m.

What a weekend...work went well and then at the end of the day I had a talk with J. She met with the higher ups and they told her that there can only be one team leader and they decided that she would do it...which is fine by me because I get less responsibility and hopefully less work. But she did say that she wants me to get promoted to Sr. Ed immediately...which would be an actual promotion..."team leader" is only a name and there wouldn't be any raise or change in title...so it would work out for the best for me...will have to discuss this with our manager next week...so hoping for the best here.

Afterwards I dragged my stuff over to Doris' place and well, I moved in and started to clean up for them right off the bat. I think I've actually made a lot of headway already! I LOVE, LOVE cleaning...it really soothes me...I guess it's the OCD talking but regardless it makes me feel better.

Anyways, went grocery shopping and man...stuff in the city is crazy expensive!!! I'm going to end up spending a ton of money just on the necessities...nevermind going out!

Met up with Vicky for the Editors show...and she ended up forgetting her ID anyways...and she wanted to buy a dress...so I ended up paying for her and she says she's going to write me a check...ok...we'll see.

The opening acts were bleh...this one band "Lake Trout" had a pretty strong following...but it was weird...they weren't that great. Anyways...Editors were pretty darn tight and they played pretty much the whole album and some b-sides...worth seeing. Had a good time hanging out with Vicky...can't believe we've known each other for years now...weird.

Afterwards...came back and just cleaned until 3 in the morning...had a bit of a restless sleep...guess I'm getting used to the place and all. Anyways, I got a lot done...and I hope DOnkey Kong appreciates it (Doris and Karl = DOnkey Kong).

Got up at like 7 this morning...but went back to sleep until 1030...then I was OUT...I went down to Union Sq. for some quarter bin comics...which turned out to be some great finds! I think I have to go there every week now just to check out the cheapies! Then went and got some jeans to wear here and a track jacket for Justin (Oh, Friday...had lunch with Josh at the food court and then we went to H & M and Old Navy...and we got track jackets there too...yes, we are straight-hetero shopping buddies.) and some ridiculously cheap slip-on sneakers...5 bucks a pair...seriously. And went to Staples and got DK this filing/folder thing for their receipts and what not...hope they like the new "system" ... Yes, I know..I am a sick, sick freak.

Afterwards...some more groceries and had lunch and dinner. Was supposed to hang with Stef today...but she never called...so I'm assuming she had a heck of a night last night...

Oh...which brings me to tonight...might hang out with Sofia and Lynn...I ran into Sofia when I was on my way to the concert...and turns out she lives 5 blocks away from here...so, maybe I'll hang out with them this week.

Having brunch or dinner with Gloria tomorrow and maybe Stef will call. I'm fine with watching tv and cleaning up here. Kinda sleepy...but hey, I'm in the city! I should be going out! Ok...time to go wander around.

work stress and BLT prime
Thursday, July 27, 2006 11:11 p.m.

An incredibly stressful week...me and J have had some serious conversations about what is going to happen and what has been happening. Just a ton of stuff that I am not happy about...and I'm hoping we can get things rolling and ok again. It has been so difficult looking at some of these pages coming in...just really hard to be happy about what I am doing.

Not to mention the whole situation that I am in...from what my coworkers tell me ...don't expect any raises or promotions to go through...the work comes first...and the rewards may be off in the distance if I choose to stick around.

Regardless, a lot of unhappy people in the office...just trying to stay afloat and not freak out. I'm prone to that... Lord, I am prone to that.

Anyways, my parents anniversary tonight...after I went over to Doris' and got the lay of the land on how this is going to work with me staying there...I went to meet my folks and Justin at BLT Prime.

Just incredible stuff...free pate, free popovers (which are AMAZING...our waitress even packed some extras up for us!) We got the 40 oz. porterhouse, amazing hangar steak, creamy spinach, summer veggies, blue cheese tater tots, chocolate tart, and free brownies...just great stuff...and total with tip was 200 bucks...my treat.

Walked around a bit, got some comics, got Jamba Juice, Best Buy stop and then home... packed up and ready for my adventure in the city while Doris and Karl are Down Under. I'm excited...but extremely broke...so I'm going to have to do this city thing on the cheap somehow.

Editors concert tomorrow with Vicky (who I think looks like a crazy little Jessica Alba) and crashing on the East side... now if only I can keep calm at work....

TGIF, Lord...give me strength and patience.

surprises...
Monday, July 24, 2006 11:01 p.m.

Ok...after my little freak out over the weekend...I am feeling better today. A lot of it has to do with work. I spoke to J about what we need to do and it seems like we are going to be able to make this work. A lot of stuff was finished and out the door today...and production seemed to really be happy with it...a huge weight off my shoulders.

And if things really are going to be as smooth as J thinks they are going to be...then I think I will be ok and mentally stable for the time being. Besides...we have our reviews coming up and I am hoping for something good.

After work...FINALLY picked up my dry cleaning after having it been there for over a month...and then my folks came back...and I heard Justin is going through some tough "teenage problems" that I am all too familiar with. He seems to be handling it well...but I hope he turns to me when he needs me. He is still my baby...even though his problems are more mature.

Picked up Doris, her mom (who I think is really adorable...and there is something about her that makes me think that she really could be like my aunt or something), and Kathy and we went to this restaurant called Yi Jia...and guess what...I saw a poster and I was like...HEY! That's the lady that...and I go inside and there she is...the MC for Doris' wedding! Apparently she sings at the restaurant on karaoke night!

And it turns out the owner of the restaurant that my dad knows happens to be Doris and Kathy's old piano teacher! HOW WEIRD IS THAT.

Had some really good food and a few (too many) glasses of wine...and it was great to see our moms talking. After all these years they finally get to have a meal together...and my mom called Doris her "god daughter" ahahhaha so cute!

And my dad was bugging me to sing...and I was like...well, I didn't bring my guitar...and turns out they had like 3...crap. So, I'm half drunk and I play "reverie" and it went off much better than I expected since I haven't played since my last show...anyways, the owner asks me to play another and I do "Milk/With or Without You" and it went well.

So, back to finishing dinner and then my dad....and then my mom both go up and sing Chinese songs! HILARIOUS and adorable. So funny! The Chang family is nuts and a buncha show offs! Justin didn't sing though...but I bet he would have.

Then, all of a sudden I hear something familiar...and I'm like...WTF?!?!? Turns out the owner recorded "Milk/With" and was playing it...and dang...I sounded GREAT! I never realize how good I sound live since I never hear it...but wow...not too shabby. And my mom said that the owner really likes my stuff and he never does that. And my dad said that the owner would like me to play for their special occassions...OMG...am I gonna be a lounge singer?!?!? And at the end of the night...he gave me a CD of me singing...and my dad and my mom's performance...HILARIOUS!

It was pretty dang funny...and dropping Doris and her family off I realized what a good time I had joking around with her and seeing her family and mine...wow...she really is like my sister. And now her mom is thinking of people to set me up with. Heck, she fixed up her son with a pretty cute girl...so yeah, there might be some there...Anyways, it was a great night.

And more good news...I might be house sitting for her when she goes on her honeymoon...this might just be the change of pace I need to get out of my rut. Maybe living in the city for a while will just give me that boost and shake that I need.

AND...turns out that Chris' gfriend is going away for a few weeks and we are going to be babysitting her dog...which is a MALTESE!!! Called "Izzy"...but responds to "Mufru"...um...whatever that is...it's super cute and yes...I will try not to pull a "Lenny"...or have a "Cosette" moment...ok pop culture geeks...'splain.

Yeah, some surprises can really flip the script...know what I mean? And the prospect of meeting new people and doing new things...makes me have some hope again.

Let's see how long this lasts...yeah, still a little grumpy and anti-social...but I can see the horizon at least.

"I'm an addict for dramatics...
Sunday, July 23, 2006 07:43 p.m.

...I confuse the two for love." ...well, that's how the rest of that Taking Back Sunday lyric goes. Anyways...

Went to get neng myun and see "Strangers With Candy" (which was HILARIOUS) with Eunice on Friday...and spent the rest of the weekend cleaning up and working on freelance stuff. I'm booked for the comedy show early September...so I'm making some headway.

Wendy (remember her) IMed me on Friday out of the blue...it's been a long time and we caught up. She's in Singapore now...just quit her job...taking a long vacation and is pretty much set on getting engaged. I joked around with her about "us" and I guess it was on her mind a little too since she was reminiscing on how we met and other things...but she's moved on and is pretty happy. While I...on the other hand... yeah, we know the story.

Also watched some "Six Feet Under" on HBO on Demand...only watched a handful of episodes before...but I just wanted to see how the series ended ...SPOILERS AHEAD! So basically, the main character dies and at the end of his life...things are kind of good and kind of crappy...and he hurts a lot of people. Not a fairy tale ending...and the last 10-15 minutes of the series where the sister is driving out to NY...there's this really haunting song playing...and the series fast forwards through the future like up to the year 2090..and it shows scenes of how all the main characters die...some of them have these long fulfilled lives...and others are cut short and die tragically...and it really got me thinking.

There's just been a lot of stuff on my mind...and basically it all came to a head this weekend. I know I go through this every now and then...but I think it's really "go" time. Basically, I've just been caught in the eye of the storm...where everyone is moving ahead in their lives and I'm feeling kind of left behind. I don't know if I'm on the same page as anyone any more...and it scares me. I need to move on with my life and make some serious changes...but I just feel so stuck and I'm not sure how I can get out of it. I wish I was a stronger person and I could just be like "ENOUGH!" I'm going to do this and this and this...but wow, I got so burned last year that I am just terrified of taking chances and making major changes...but I feel compelled to. So these two sides of me are seriously struggling...and quite frankly...it's driving me mad.

The obvious things: Doris and Eric getting married, Grace going to business school, Romana planning her wedding, Amy out in Cali, Chris and his girlfriend now, some stuff that Eunice is going through...even Jen and Mike in Cali and Jen and Ken moving to Japan...and Justin with a girlfriend and going out with his friends...and not spending enough time with me...all of this stuff is basically what I call "moving on, moving ahead"...and here I am...reverting. Spinning my wheels. The tortoise stuck on his back.

I've been diving deeper into comics, music, anime, books, dvds lately...I mean EVEN MORE than usual...because I guess I want to escape all of these changes. If I'm going to feel "left behind"...I may as well immerse myself in things that I love.

I guess...my whole thing now is that I'm just unsure of what I should be doing and who I should be doing it with. I'm feeling more and more isolated and more and more like an outsider looking in. And I need to figure out a lot of stuff on my own. I know that change is hard...and we have to really fight sometimes to adjust...but I guess I don't adjust well all the time.

OK...junior year into senior year of high school...I think that's when it was...a lot of my friends were shifting around and I was hanging out with other people...and my little aunt was getting married and the whole college thing...I had my first real nervous breakdown. I remember totally freaking out and crying and then even rubbing knives and plastic rulers in my palm...almost to the point of breaking the skin. It was just crazy.

And I know that there have been so many times in my life when I feel like I am on a precarious edge and I'm not sure how to come down. I've been there enough times that I know when it is coming... and I feel it coming.

I'm trying to deal with it better...but it seriously could just be one more little thing that sends me over...the work thing these past two weeks has me so incredibly unhappy and stressed out...and I think some things will be cleared up this week (hopefully)...but there are so many other things that are just swirling about. And yeah, I'm not sure what I should do.

I am fiery and passionate by nature...but when it comes down to times of stress I need to be reigned in. I even told my coworker that...and she promised to make sure I don't flip out and quit.....but in terms of my personal life...well, I think I may need some time alone to figure some things out. So, if I disappear...or if I'm not as available...don't be surprised.

So, consider this my notice... I'm taking a "time out". I need a break from all of these life changes. I need a break to figure out who the hell I am and what I want anymore. I guess I need a break from life. It's all too much and I'm not ready for it. I just feel overwhelmed with all of this. I'm lonely...and yet all I want is to be alone. It's the whole Incredible Hulk dilemma...know what I mean?

So, take care....go live life. I'm going to try to live mine. I'll pop in every once in a while...but yeah, I need a vacation...from everything. Excuse me while I go deal with my crazy.

OK...down periscope...see ya in a bit. Don't bother knocking. No one's home.

RAIN!!!
Friday, July 21, 2006 05:36 p.m.

It's 5:30 on a Friday and I am still at work....it is just POURING out there. Anyways, Eunice is coming over for Korean food...so I'm just gonna blog since it's been a while. (And listening to some Fleetwood Mac...ahhhh)

WHAT A WEEK. I'm exhausted..was out every night this week. Wednesday night went to Forest Hills to get tuxes fitted...then a maelstrom of work...and Stef calls at midnight...hahah won't go into it...but it was a funny story. I love that kid!

Thursday night...well, went out with Iris.

Met up at Vig Bar for one drink (too hot for more) and she was EARLY. I am so not used to that! Anyways, had a good chat with her about work etc...then we walked over to Joe'S Shanghai for some shao long bao...mmmm it's been too long my plump little friends! and dang...that girl can EAT.

Shared a table with tourists...and had to tell their daughter that teriyaki sauce is actually Japanese and not Chinese...not gonna get any there. Anyways, had food then went to Chinatown Ice Cream Factory...and sat in the park.

We were talking and watching people play chess in the park...and then all of a sudden she got quiet and was like "so...we are just hanging out, huh?" ACK...so I asked her if we needed to have a talk...and I said that I am at a weird place in my life...and well, I was hoping we were friends.

And she said yes...but down the road if anything happens...so I guess she DOES still have an inkling that this might go somewhere else.

As for me...yes, I like her as a friend. And she isn't as FOBby as I thought. And she is pretty cute. But do I see anything more? I don't know...I never rule anything out...but then again...I don't know what to think or feel anymore.

I guess a part of me is afraid...and a part of me is holding on to something else. I can never be sure what is real. Sometimes I think I genuinely feel one way or another...but then...something changes...and I am unsure again. Maybe it really is just the heat. Who knows at this point?

Anyways, Eunice should be coming any minute... sigh... time to brave the storm.

TGIF.

WORK! ARRRGH!
Tuesday, July 18, 2006 10:53 p.m.

Man, Josh and his band were opening for Bon Jovi at Giants Stadium and I was stuck at work writing test questions all day...what a life. Josh is living the dream! Whack the heck outta those drums, bro!

Steamy hot day and I decided to get a new bag...got an awesome Swiss Army bag that transforms from messenger to briefcase to backpack! Swiss Army indeed! And I was delirious from walking around in 100 degree weather.

Met up with Grace after work at the Parker Meridian burger joint. Was good but wasn't as great as I heard it was supposed to be. Had a brief chat about changes in life...and when to sever ties or make them stronger. I have some crazy ideas in my head...and heart...and I'm not sure who to listen to. I know that I probably shouldn't listen to me...but still. Should I "be a man"...or "wait and see"...I'm an idiot either way.

Getting tuxedo fittings tomorrow and returning a phone battery I don't need. But wow...it must be 20 degrees cooler right now...thunderstorms and winds...AHHHH! Still sleeping in the living room cause my room just keeps the heat in...dang... I need to get a new AC.

The Neverending Wedding
Monday, July 17, 2006 11:49 p.m.

Saturday: Movie day. I just chilled and watched a bunch of movies: "Land of the Dead" (not bad, not great) and "Just Friends" which I loved because I totally understand being in the friend zone...man, how does anyone ever bust out of that without going away for a decade and becoming a brand new person... I have "crossed over" with disastrous results...(ie. the tragedy of last year) so I know it can be awful...but could it ever be good? The whole "When Harry Met Sally" thing...I'm thinking it's a myth.

Sunday: Doris' wedding banquet in Flushing. I just spent most of the day getting ready...Alex and the family came over and I played with Henrietta for a bit. Man, she's a plump little guinea pig now!

Anyways, Eunice came to pick me up...and wow...she was just stunning. This is probably the 3rd time I've ever seen her in a dress...and wow. Just a knockout. I always tell her she has the best legs of anyone I know...but she's too modest to show off. She's a jeans kind of gal...which is cute...but wow...the dress. 'nuff said.

Get to Flushing and a lot of the same Aruba culprits were there. A few new faces...and since some of the groomsmen weren't there...I substituted and was part of the wedding party...I escorted Jen and Livia down...and things just got weirder and weirder. I read an abbreviated version of the speech I gave in Aruba... and any magic that was there was gone...because the woman translating just...well, couldn't. I had to translate most of it...and it was just PAINFUL. Embarassingly so.

Some highlights: all of Doris' kid cousins did a little dance number...actually a few...which was flippin' adorable... and then her aunts did one...which was pretty cute too. Not cute: the magician...which was cool, but totally weird. And the "cirque du so gay" MC who was decked out in black ruffles, had a dangly earring, had some weird snaky dance moves, and did some nasty grody karaoke...one song may have actually been in Portugese. Regardless, it was just FASCINATING...as in "car wreck" fascinating.

And I can't even begin with the FOBby glamour wedding photos. Part of Doris' cuteness/sass/trademark are her freckles...um...completely airbrushed away. So obvious. And the FOBby banner with the folded hands and the fake braids...and the random "fading away English text"...which said something about "Albanians" and "Kosovo"...just...wow.

Good things: Ray. I was so glad to see him. It's been years...and he hasn't changed much. Same guy...into comics and sci fi and we giggled away about Joss Whedon and comics...good to have him back for a bit. Will have to email him ASAP.

Too hot to eat much...and just busy ushering and hanging with Aruba people (I call them that now) and just sitting back and realizing just how pretty Eunice is...with or without the dress (wow, that sounded so wrong.)

Anyways...good times. Home...slept...hung over and met with a crapstorm at work today. It was just gogogogogogo...and then Romana!

Haven't seen her in so long and she got so thin! The wedding stuff and the summer ...and the stress of all the stuff from this past year. Still...she looks good.

Met up with Tufts people and had lunch at KGS. Serena, Clara, and Eurie...pretty much all the same. Didn't get much quality time...but I was glad I got a chance to hug Romana at least. We talk all the time...but it's been a while since we've actually been in the same place.

Crap. work. more work.

Was full of adrenaline and I didn't want to go home...so random quick drink with Gloria...whom I haven't seen in some time...and wow...a few weeks and people can look so different. Her hair grew out and she was well rested from Florida...so maybe that was it. Caught up a little and we plan on making a weekend of watching Veronica Mars Season 2 when I get it in a month or so.

AND THEN...went over to Doris' and ordered Vietnamese food. Just decompressed and talked about the wedding, our friends and family...and the future. Once all her wedding business is taken care of...she can try to hook me up with someone.

As I've stated before. I don't trust myself. I have seen waaaaay too much crazy in the past year and a half...so I'm not sure what I think or feel is ever real anymore. So, I have to stick to my guns and go with "react and not act" as my motto. At least until the summer is over...or 2007. There is so much I want to do, say, or just proclaim...but am i just crazy from the heat...or is it something that has been there all along and I'm finally realizing this...I know I sound crazy...but all of this applies to EVERYTHING. Work, family, friends, faith, and love...every aspect of my life is tinged with hesitancy...I just don't want this precarious house of cards to fall down...not after this year or so of rebuilding.

Basically, the healing goes on...and I'm in an ok place right now. But all it takes is just one thing to send me spiralling down...or euphorically up. And I want neither. I want the solid ground that faith in God and faith in those I know and love affords me. I do not want to be shaken.

So, yes...I will react and bring my "A-game" to whatever is dealt....but I do not want to be the one choosing the game, shuffling the deck, or going all in. I call. I CALL!

Ok...the heat is getting to me and I feel crazy. I need some love...and soon.

Aruba Part Three...and work stuff
Thursday, July 13, 2006 10:37 p.m.

So, me and Joyce are "in charge" now...but it's not "official"...I'm not sure if this is a "prove it first" situation or if they are going to make it official soon. All I know is I have A LOT of work and I'm not happy about doing this again without things getting better. We'll have to see what happens after next week when I have a chance to actually breathe and think.

Ok...Sunday: So after the wedding...there was an after party...and we got kicked out of Doris and Karl's room because we were loud. So we hung out in Charles and Jeff's room and just putzed around for a bit. Had a good talk with Jay and Sara also PC and Ken a bit. Got out of there at like 5...but couldn't sleep until 730. Next morning I was up before 10 and we went over to the other side of the hotel for breakfast buffet. I was STARVING and by this time I could pretty much eat normally. Anyways, we chowed down and then I went back and hung with Stef for a few hours before we went to the pool for a swim and some more drinks. Drinks of choice: Pina Coladas, Strawberry Shortcakes, and Toasted Almond.

Dinner time...we waited for Doris and Karl to get back from photos so we didn't leave until 830. We all went to "La Dolce Vita" for Italian (which I thought was ridiculous since in NYC we are going to have waaay better Italian)...and the meal lasted until past midnight. They just did not have enough help and it was pretty painful.

There was this one girl who looked kind of like what I imagine S's cousin to look like. The hair, the nails, the tan...but she was a little...um...crass. "Ghetto" at times...but yeah...I didn't really talk to her...

Anyways, went back to the casino with a few people and I was tired and easily swayed to play ...craps. I was up 5 bucks and 30 minutes later...I lost 40. Anyways...I "crapped out" and just went back up with Stef.

Monday: Just packed and got ready to go. Off to the airport where I got some "stroopwaffles" (yummy caramelly waffles...those Dutch!) and got on the plane. Passed out after a while...and then I was back in NY. Linda (Doris' cousin) drove me home...and it was good to be back.

All in all...I had an amazing time. I did think about the past a little...but I was fine. I'm not worried about the future so much. So what if people are coupled off and married? I'm going to be patient and I'm going to end up with someone that deserves to be with me. I have a lot to offer. I know this....and I refuse to settle. So, yeah I can hang with couples and not feel like a complete loser.

And I feel a little more confident seeing so much naked flesh. Man, the human body comes in all shapes and sizes...and let's just say people look way better with clothes on. :P

So...home...work...saw "Superman Returns" with Justin last night...it was good, not great. (and Kate Bosworth reminds me of Emily...I should email her) and Romana will be in town on Monday.

Tomorrow: movie with Eunice (I missed her so much!), Jen/Ken party, maybe shopping with Stef on Saturday, and then banquet Sunday. Good times.

Aruba Part Two...and weird things.
Thursday, July 13, 2006 09:37 p.m.

Some more psychic moments:

1. Doris's Mon's name is "Siu Mei"...yeah....kinda close. 2. New person at work on my team is named "Sue" and the first time I met her she was wearing a shirt saying "Life is Good" 3. On the news...about the storm...showed a street that might have been the block she used to live on

Unrelated stuff: first time I ever listened to U2 on my ipod was today...and I was listening to "achtung baby"...got up to "one"...which was the song after "even better than the real thing"...which was playing at the Gap just when I walked in. THEN...thinking how weird that was...I run into Melissa Lee on the street...who I know from HS...circa when "achtung" came out.

More but I forgot...anyways...back to Aruba:

Saturday: the big day of the wedding. Day went by in a blur...but it was mostly hanging out near the bar at the hotel and getting a few knick knacks. Watched Doris get her hair and make up done...and then before I knew it...it was time to get packed and off to the wedding. Walked over with folks to the other side of the hotel and then it was time for the ceremony. Karl actually got teary...but Doris was laughing and smiling through the whole thing. Trying to be all cute...hahah. Anyways, the person that was doing the ceremony stood in front of the couple...and blocked them from our view...which i thought was idiotic. And the video and photo folks were waaaay too close for comfort. Anyways, the ceremony was fine...and I'm sure the vid and pics will be nice...

Took the boat ride to the island and it was time for horsdeouvres and drinks. I was busy getting ready and didn't have much...but the calamari and tuna steaks were amazing...and the polaroid/scrap book was a great idea. I took a pic with Stef and Jamie and we did our "Three's Company" page. Anyways, off to dinner and I am getting thoroughly trashed at this point. The bride and the wedding party came in and it was fun and cute. Doris really looked adorable that night. Winky and sassy is the best way to describe it. Anyways, I had almost 7 drinks and before I knew it...it was time for my speech.

The speech went off GREAT...and it was easy because it was for Doris and Karl...and I just have so much history, memories, and love...piece of cake. People LOVED the speech...a few people said it was the best wedding speech they ever heard. One girl cried (which was weird cause I thought it was mostly funny) and it was really well received.

The first course was tuna carpaccio...which was utterly DISGUSTING. I had one bite. Then the steak was pretty good...dessert was good...but I was too busy dancing and drinking that they took it.

Anyhoo....DJ Blue (I think that was his name) was from Pianos (remember that?) and Karl and Charles spoke to him about doing the wedding...and he thought it was for them! HAHHAH...anyways...he was just freaking AWESOME...he spun some really good stuff... lots of hip-hop and rock stuff...and a lot of unexpected things too. Best was when he did some Gnarls...and then later he spun some Journey and "Josie"...I was so drunk at that point I was singing into a mini-quiche. Fun though.

At one point, me, stef, and jamie crawled into a hammock and just swung around for a bit. It was amazing...looking at the red carpet, the lights, the beach, the palm trees, the moon, the stars, and the water...just awesome.

Danced my arse off...it really is more fun when you are drunk and barefoot. Then a bunch of people went in for a midnight dip...no way was I going since I must have had 25 plus drinks by then (including at least 5 shots of hard liquor...nuts) but I hung out with Diane, Chris, Mandy, and Liz and we had a good laugh and looked out on all this madness for Doris and Karl.

Seriously, I can't imagine anyone having a more perfect wedding. Looking back on it...I wish it never ended. Food, drinks, music, friends....and I didn't get sad for a minute. Even though I was surrounded by couples at a gorgeous wedding...I was just happy to be alive and happy for one of my best friends in the world.

So all in all...I'm proud of myself and dangnabbit...I had a good time.

Ok....Aruba Part Three and some thoughts on work...but I need a break first and I don't want this long entry to disappear...so I'm gonna post it now. ZOOOOOP. Magic of the internet.

ARUBA--Part One!
Tuesday, July 11, 2006 09:12 p.m.

Well, first off...I get to work and I get the news that I am transferred back...I don't have a say in it...and apparently me and Joyce are going to head up the division. But so where's the title and/or the raise? Just more work and it's not making me happy.

Josh and his band won the battle of the bands and they are going to be opening for Bon Jovi next week. WOW! Congrats!

Ok...so let's get to the whole wedding business. Just going to list some highlights:

July 5th,Wednesday: Really, really sick...but manage to make it to Doris' mom's place and we go to the airport, meet up with everyone, and get on the plane. I pass out and wake up in Aruba. Get settled and I end up rooming with Stef...which ended up being great. First night we all went out to Pinchos...and I had ginger ale and bread while everyone else got great food and drinks. Karl's mom was pretty cool. I ended up talking to her for a while. Talked to people...but just was not myself. Feeling so out of it...could not do much so I went back to the hotel and just slept.

Thursday: Still sick...but it was time for the catamaran trip. Everyone got on board and we set out for a booze cruise. I got my ipod out and listened to Duran Duran...and it was perfect. The weather, the water...I tried to have a few drinks...and almost puked on the way home. Anyways, it was a lot of fun. I couldn't go snorkeling...but it was enough just to be able to see the fish from above. People got TRASHED. Karl was GONE. And Liz, she was really nice and we talked a lot...and then she got drunk, hugged me, and felt up my arse! hahahah...she's Victor's gfriend...so no worries. Anyways, we showered changed and went to Que Pasa for what was the best meal of the trip. I actually started to eat again and had the shnitzel...which was good. I had some of Doris' seafood pasta and it was amazing...dessert was choc creme brulee that was great...and it was garnished with a little cherry tomato thing that was just incredible. Afterwards, I was feeling sick again...not used to food. And I paid for it with cramps.

Friday: Got up and went to the Dutch Pancake house with a bunch of people and had some really good savoury crepes. Then went to the private island to get some sun and swim in the salty, salty ocean. Iguanas! Flamingos! crazy stuff. Just really peaceful. Came back and hung out...drinks and stuff at the hotel bar. Then we got ready for the rehersal dinner which was like a tiki buffet place. Food was ok...but I still couldn't eat much. The slide show that Victor made was really cute. Doris is just adorable and Karl takes such great, funny pictures. Afterwards some people went to the casino and I just went back to hang out a little bit and slept.

Ok...well...pause with the highlights before I get to the wedding and talk about who I hung out with mostly. Of course, I hung out with Stef a lot since she was my roommate...and I got to the point where I was feeling really protective of her. She's a tough cookie...but I still think she needs some quality healing time. In any case, we had a bunch of heart to hearts and a lot of laughs...so I think we really bonded. Old friends that I got to talking to: Sara and Duane...I love those guys. Sara is just amazing. I love her to death and cannot wait to play with Marcus...she's just very nurturing and makes sure people are having fun and playing safe. Jay and Elisa...I didn't know Jay all that well, even though we went to Stuy...but I think we really bonded and got to talking a bunch about the past and how things are now. Elisa is the same...cute, pouty, whiny, surprisingly funny, and sweet. Jen and Ken...I always end up hanging out with Ken at some point. He's just a cool laid back guy that is always out to have fun and cracks me up to no end. Jen is much the same. If I needed someone to hang out with...I'd go to them. Victor and Liz...Victor is always kind of quiet...but we always end up talking about music and this and that. And Liz was a HUGE surprise...she's actually really, really, out going and funny. Not anything like when I met her before when she was so quiet. She turned out to be one of my fave new friends. Mandy and Alex...going to their wedding. Another couple that I felt comfortable hanging out with and especially at meals and such. Pei Chung and Melissa...hung out with them a lot too. Chinese and funny...always had something to say. Had a bunch of good laughs with them. Diane and Chris...I love these guys too. Diane especially is really funny and always wants to do stuff. We ended up talking and hanging out a lot. She always made me feel welcomed (especially since we bonded at Cindy's wedding)... Charles, Jeff, John, Jamie (who ended up staying with us for 2 nights), Ping, Eric, Aileen and Peter, Erin, and other folks were all cool too...but I'm getting tired and running out of steam here.

So, I'll get to the blushing bride tomorrow. She really was beautiful...and sassy! And it was the best wedding...EVER! More tomorrow.

Oh man...I need to sleep early tonight.

Sick! OH NO!!!
Tuesday, July 4, 2006 04:21 p.m.

OMG...I feel so miserable. I have the worst pounding headache that won't go away, a pesky fever, and my stomach cramps up every hour or so. UGH!

My mom brought me a Vietnamese sandwich last night...and I bet that's what did it.

Even looking at this computer screen hurts. ARRRGH!

Leaving at 5 AM...and turns out I may be sharing a room with 2 girls? EEEP!

I just want to be healthy. URRRGH! This ruins everything!

Hoping the next 12 hours or so will make me feel better...Lord, help me. Aruba, here we come! Happy 4th!

Johnny's Banquet
Sunday, July 2, 2006 02:40 p.m.

Archived and some thoughts on Johnny's wedding banquet...

So, I ended up going to Johnny's wedding banquet at the last minute cause they thought I'd be in Aruba by now...anyways...it was really nice and low key...since it was 2 months after he got married in Hawaii.

Mostly took care of my mom and drank a lot. Met someone named Nina that was a friend of some of my childhood friends...she said I even took her to St. Mark's a long time ago! Man...don't really remember her...but I do think I have a pic of her somewhere...she's actually applying to work as a student teacher at Doris's school...so I'll put them in touch and hopefully reconnect with my old friends.

Saw Katie...she is my godsister's cousin...man, she used to get in trouble all the time when she was a kid...she looks the same but she's matured...we should hang out sometime...

Ate...got drunk...came home and cleaned up. Have to put some finishing touches on the speech and try to get rid of this rash! Got a rash all over...ack...hurts.

I may end up doing absolutely nothing over the 4th...which is completely fine by me.