i love yous are thrown about so casually nowadays, so having someone say to me i really really like you was refreshing. it made me stop, and it really hit home.

thanks. i really really like you too :)

me : did you know i never knew yi an and yi jian were brothers?

jess : what?! you didn't? they've been brothers like, their whole lives!

me : ......

i'm wondering who sounds more silly.

you know how the government always makes a hooha about speaking mandarin? i'm beginning to see the light of it all. think about it, how many of us still speak mandarin? i speak to all my friends in english, sprinkling some chinese cheng yu here and there mostly to make a joke out of something and that's it. blogging in english isn't helping either.

since our generation is becoming english-dominated, and since i believe that we tend to stick with a batch of the same kind of people as we get along in life, we will end up dating and marrying the same english-dominated people. we'll say our vows in english, we'll talk over our bacon and eggs in english, we'll read the english papers, we'll scream out orgasm-induced vulgarities during sex in english. and we'll talk to our kids in english, and make them have english names. they'll grow up knowing nothing about mandarin cos their parents won't even be speaking to each other in mandarin.

what do we do?!

that's where the PRC scholars come in and save the world. i realised that when i was surrounded by them one day in school last week. they will pass on the chinese language to their children, so that there will still be mandarin-speaking kids in singapore who will hopefully educate their english-dominated school mates. no wonder the government is so keen to sponsor their education.

but then again, there're always the chinese songs at kbox...

i'm real excited to know that yakun kaya toast is going to be opened in yishun! shit man, i love this stuff, though everyone tells me you can get it cheaper and better at any ol' kopitiam.

i've got to agree with sandra on the religious hypocrisy issue. am too lazy to blog about it so just read her blog.

just two more days and those environmentalists will be very thankful to me cos i'm gonna be recycling all those school notes that has been ruthlessly gotten from the amazon rainforest.

finally have time for a breather from the exams, so decided to blog down some of the stuff that have been accumulating in my head all of last week while i was studying in front of my wall. ok i know some of you probably have an impression that i've been mugging my ass off (yes, you val) but to be perfectly honest, compared to last semester, what i've been doing this semester is... incomparable (in a bad way). all the same, i hope i do well. God bless us all!

speaking of God, i've been dying to blog about The Passion of The Christ. caught it two saturdays ago, and the experience was indescribable. for the benefit of jin and those who haven't caught it, here's my own list of do's and don'ts for the movie:

DO:

- bring tissue. and i don't mean a packet or two; bring ten packets, bring tissue rolls, tissue boxes, towels or those sports shammys that can soak up bucketfuls of water because i swear, you will cry like you've never cried before. if you don't cry watching this, then you are either heartless or your heart is made of the most stony stone. i was sobbing endlessly, and jess had to hold me. (jean, i heard from jin about your experience. haha sorry i couldn't come out with this list sooner.) i believe the movie will be expecially heartbreaking for the very pious christians, so be prepared!

- bring shades. your eyes will be super duper puffy after that you wouldn't want anyone to see you in such a miserable state.

- go with a christian friend or someone with knowledge of the bible so that they can explain to you the flashbacks of the movie. not knowing the stories will totally dampen your movie experience! it's like, you won't understand what's happening.

- watch a late night movie / at a theatre near your house, unless you look gorgeous after crying.

- watch the movie with an open mind. i distinctly remember being irritated at rushing for the movie, so i indignantly claimed i didn't mind being late cos evangelical movies "ain't my cup of tea". it turned out the movie was more factual than evangelical; it didn't feel like it was trying to force feed the faith down our throats, and despite being a non-christian myself, i was thoroughly inspired and deeply touched.

- bring a plastic bag in case, like me, you puke after the movie. i vomitted my chicken rice down the toilet bowl of shaw centre. elisa suggested that maybe i had an subconscious aversion to gory movies. but it wasn't about the gore, i know it. i'm all for gory movies. the only other movie i ever watched that had me crying like no tomorrow was I Am Sam, and i puked after that too. at that time, i thought it was just the sushi. now i think it was just the intense crying, the cold cold theatre, and that throbbing headache you get when you cry too much... it's a lethal combination.

- bring a sweater. it's enough worrying about your dripping mucus, your blocked ears, rudolph nose, and panda eyes without having to worry about the cold.

DON'T

- be late for the movie. ugh i think i missed like a whole chunk of the beginning. was reading through carol's email explaining the symbolism behind certain scenes in the movie which i was totally clueless about. so i feel like watching it again. anyone?

i bombarded jess with a million and one questions about the movie after that while going home in the car, and i didn't even mind the million and one police stops that had us stuck in traffic at 3 am in the morning. he was extremely patient and answered them best as he could, and i was real glad that he wasn't being dogmatic about it. that's one of the things i like about being with him. the thing is, a lot of people misinterpret my general curiosity about religion as a longing to be part of it all. i am a taoist myself but i'm not religious at all; i think of myself as more of a free thinker. i'm not atheist at all; i don't deny that i believe that God exists.

i may want to belong somewhere someday, but i'd like to take my time to find out about it all. for now, i just want to find out, to learn, and just have my curiosity satisfied. maybe, someday.