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Bookie McBooks: Girl on Film: Sweet Sweet Music
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Yesterday, I got a notice from the IRS that said I owed $33,621.00. As it turns out, the IRS people made a typo and entered a 1099 of mine as 69,750.00 when it was in fact 697.50. I still have to copy the forms and mail them in, which is a pain. Still, if this is what I get in place of an audit, I'll take it. I have a lovely new cookie recipe that I made up all by myself and it's remarkably good. I might print it here, but mostly plan on squirreling it away for a book I'm working on. Or maybe the Bake-off.Happy vernal equinox! Feel the power, dude. FInd secret messages within words! Visit the Tropic of Scorpio! I actually found a reasonable translation of Kogepan's story! I didn't know he had so many little burned friends. I thought his home was supposed to be a good bakery. If any of you find a book called "How to Be a Delicious Bread", please get it for me. I will be making a cake to take to Easter food/family time. It will not be this one. I think someone has confused "bunny" with "capybara". Here are directions to pipe a chicken! The annual semi-annoyance of this is coming up, and I am once again glad that I have never had to participate. Not that I don't think taking kids to work is a good idea, sort of, but I've heard of too many instances of people using it instead of daycare; a five-year-old won't get anything out of it. I have mixed feelings about the boy/girl thing that happened so quickly. The Ms. Foundation's idea was for teachers to present cool in-class programs so the boys had a good day too. Apparently, that doesn't happen much. I've noticed that people with office jobs participate, while walmart checkers usually don't. Maybe this year, we can take our kids with us to the unemployment office. Now there is this version of it, which I think is funny. Haven't we all had at least one conversation that is mostly an explanation of vocabulary? Sweetie runs into this problem frequently, with his weirdo combination of tech words and advertising jargon. The Gummi is really firming up nicely now. It's been nearly two months, for those who have lost track. It can still be bent and wiggled, but not easily. I have conquered the gummi. Seattle is getting fatter. Now that obesity is killing more people than tobacco, will the country find a way to put fast food corporations on trial? A few years back, the big food chains began supplying nutritional info on their products, but maybe this is just the equivelant of warnings on packs of smokes. However we die, looks like we don't much care about our immortal souls. This is old, but still funny and foolish. Everyone knows satan is based in Federal Way. Poor Saint Patrick. All that work, for nothing. Feeling like a criminal, or just want to look intimidating? Have fun! None of you probably need to know this, but last night I was having a perfectly normal dream doing perfectly normal things in a perfectly normal dream land, when all of a sudden, Shirley from What's Happening showed up and started telling me off. I was all "oh stopppp it, Shirl" and woke up. What in the holy hell? Today would be even neater if the year was 1592. This evening, I will be staging a Cookie Experiment with maple sugar. Yummy. I hope. You should buy some new jewelry. I had fun writing up catalog copy for my amazingly talented friend, Holly. This is where you buy stuff and laugh at what I wrote. It's not perfect yet; we know about the little booboos, so don't feel compelled to report them. All in good time. One bracelet needs new copy, as I had forgotten that Holly is allergic to Cher and wouldn't let me name it after her. I came up with a cool warrior princess instead.Do you have to go here by helicopter? Sweetie should become a charter member. My personal favorite is this 'un, and I have an Official Little Cowgirl card to prove it. Unfortunately, all the events are "formal Western" attire. Yikes. But hurrah for these fabulous boots. I can't decide between "day of the dead" and "western gals". Last night, some poor souls were invited to my house to eat snacks. Some of the snacks were Tricky, and I learned a few minor things about practical jokes and food. Do not try and trick polite people- two sweet gentlemen were quietly expiring from Meatballs of Doom, probably thinking that Jill was some weirdly terrible cook. Make sure the "bad" things you choose to use are universally bad, or some people will like them more than they should. I figured a teaspoon of pure anchovy paste hiding in a stuffed mushroom would be nasty, but no. Canned biscuits hide cotton bits better than biscuits from scratch, and are much less trouble. Alcohol and plenty of other good food go some way towards forgiveness, but not the whole way. I expect retribution of some sort. An update on the Gummi Experiment. It's very firm now, more like a jujube. I wouldn't want to try and chew it. But it's still definitely gummi. Perhaps my supposition was correct, and gummi is indeed eternal. I know I'm not the only one who loves the earlier "offensive" Beastie Boys. "He recognized my girlie from the back of her head". Ahh. Spoken like a true buddhist. I talk about fish. I wanted the headline to read "See? Food!" and it's probably a good thing I was shot down. Even the Weekly has its limits. With the job market being what it is, I thought I'd include a few helpful links to you folks looking for career changes. Entertainment?Fitness? Administration? Manufacturing? While you are following your new path, I will be following mine, disguised as a 12-year-old. Today was my first time swimmin at The Y. I got lost about one thousand times in the dressing room area- it seems to go for miles, and all lockers look alike to me. Had a little jaunt in the spa and sauna all by my lonesome, than toddled off to do four laps in the pool before I collapsed, wheezing. Clearly, the benefit is going to be in the mile walk to and fro, rather than the swimming itself, at least for a while. There were two old men doing laps with me, one scary-fat guy who checked his pulse every two laps, and one thinner gentleman with no clue as to proper lane etiquette. I went with the thin man, as am not certified on CPR currently. When I returned to the spa area, it was filled with chubby, naked, giggling Filipino women. These ladies were clones of my beanie baby freaks, and it was very distrubing to see them naked. Naked is just so darn naked. Food of the Day: Meatballs! Pirate of the Day: Ann Bonny. And in honor of Jen and Malaika, who Would Be Elves, here is this. i just re-read Atlas Shrugged. Does anyone else find it amusing that Objectivism is now supported by a non-profit? this section seems to be an attempt at justifying the non-profit status, but I'd hope that Rand would've found it offensive. At drugstores in Canada, there are prominent signs at checkout that say "one out of two smokers died last year" and other similarly stark messages. I found this, which is sort of interesting, but also got me thinking about whether the price of smokes ever really gets anyone to stop. When I was 20 and worked on the Ave, I remember folks who would swear that they'd quit when the price hit $2.00/pack, then changed that to $3.00/pack. A guy in front of me just bought a pack of some offbrand in the minimart downstairs for $5.65. Price doesn't seem like much of a deterrent. And then there's this. For the first time ever, I find myself liking a new commercially-produced perfume. Unfortunately, its tagline is "tuberose reinvented", which is terrible. If computers had smell-o-vision, I would provide a link. Changing the world, one petit morte at a time. Remember to "think of the planet", kids. The next will be on April Fools' Day, for those who need to plan for such events. Have you ever stolen anything from a restaurant? You should tell me about it, you sticky-fingered little thief. I once lifted a kelly green napkin holder from a UW cafeteria and gave to a theater friend. The napkin holder later ended up in the prop department for the U. It was really more like department allocation, wasn't it? Article coming up for the Weekly, you see, when you little kleptos will be revealed in all your shame. or glory. whichever. If any of you happen to be some sort of Restaurant Robin Hood, stealing flatware and taking it to soup kitchens, then clearly it's glory. Happy National Noodle Month. For some reason, October is "love a noodle month", so I guess this month we celebrate The Noodle without actually loving The Noodle. Oh. It's also Women's History Month. This site is better than the official one. Got my first-ever acceptance from a food magazine. Will be published in November in the glossy pages of Northwest Palate. I'll be telling the world about how to use the NW-grown products that are sold here. Quite exciting. |
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