friday

yoyoyo~ juz trying out this new template. not very satisfied but yeah... it's coming from someone who doesn't know a single thing about html kae... yeah...

090503 4:51pm

friday

okay... i guess im quite satisfied... wanted the picture to be the background at first... yeah... anywae... link me people :)

090503 4:54pm

friday

hmmm... just updated my links and i guess quite alot of stuff happened... ha... lotsa people got new layouts dunno how long ago... shows how much ive been reading blogs and yeah... didn't noe cheryl, enyi and clara had blogs and that enyi and clara linked me so i linked them back :) ooh~ need to link jenny too... haha... hmm... anywae... had pft and 2.4... needless to say i was dying for 2.4 as usual... i passed anywae. yay. oh. and now the public speaking thing isn't compulsory. hmm... was quite okay about going and was quite happi when i heard didn't need to go but now... dunno... got conflicting emotions about it. anywae eliza is hogging me for details about her. ha. and we know something she doesn't. sorry. but we reallie cant tell. yeah. oh... hmm... have you ever thought about how the human mind works and all. okay actually that wasn't what i wanted to talk about but i didn't know how to phrase it. like we think animals are stupid and aliens are aliens. but maybe animals think we're stupid and aliens think we're aliens. okay. im so blabbering but... yeah. i dunno. yeah and okay need to update abit. mdm rehana went on leave so now emily soon is taking over. think she's much better than most of the reliefs though. she's quite strict though. as in handing up work and stuff. hmm... hav ivan soh now. he reallie cant teach. we had miss sandra yesterday and i actually understood translation. woohoo~ ha. ivan soh taught todae but he was so hopeless. he had to like ask her for help kinda thing. anywae. he's just reallie sad. hai. lets see. what else. my uncle still hasn't come with the new com. oh and we were selling yesterdae and today for SL. yeah. hmm... think yesterdae's sales was much better? though i wasnt there. oh and i didn't go for sectionals yesterday coz i had a headache. and the last time i did i came down with a fever. and my mum was unfortunately at home and made me take my temperature coz she was afraid i had a fever. hmm... and my grandmother went to stay with my uncle for dunno why. my dad came home from malaysia last night. and i have no idea why im writing all this. sigh. oh. we have chinese test next next wed with eleven chapters so she wants ting xie. we have mth test nxt fri. i have to do the lit journal. the lit ws ... ha. im reallie going to type it out. im mad. the lit questions. damnit. its graded. chinese compo. eng file. somehow sometimes i reallie look forward to history coz its damn slack and there's hardly any hw. oh and the eng expositary thing. hmm... and how do you do the 'draw a line across' thing? as in what's the html? anywae i should go bathe. hai. wish i had swing in my house. want to swing up reallie reallie high. and tilt my head all the way back and let my hair drag onto the ground. yeah. reminds me of that time we went to may's house. me, may, jerome, che hao. < i think> argh. cant remember. somehow we don't seem the likely group huh? hai. it was for AWIT. think its a reallie nice book. never used to like it or even think about it when we were doing it. but yeah. come to think of it. its reallie nice. the power of love. ahhh... haha. anywae... yeah... what does being humane mean anywae? i mean like if you say Man is human but he destroys. he destroys the most. he's selfish. not giving. if you compare it. arent animals even more humane then us. i mean they give willingly for their young. with hardly any exceptions. unlike humans. ditching their newborns by the road or the nunnery or whatever. they only take what they reallie need. sometimes wished we were still tribal. i mean like cannibals are humans too. you cant say they arent just coz they eat humans. i mean we eat animals. but just coz they eat us they arent humans? sigh. and yeah. mrs mohamad had a talk with me. never knew it was that bad. ha. whatever. i mean i guess i reallie find some of the lessons boring. i mean i said no but. yeah. come to think of it. chinese is reallie boring. i mean like even if i don't go for any lessons i bet i wouldn't fail anywae coz she doesn't teach. i mean even if i go or not it doesn't make a difference except that if i go, im wasting time. yeah. sigh. whatever. shall go and bathe even though i know i'll regret it when i remember something i want to type here. yeah. bye. oh. and i should reallie time myself to see how long i take to type one entry. ha. mayb i will.

090503 6:09pm

friday

okay... so the url of my blog doesn't actually have the feeling i want it to but hey... i think its still passable... think l.f. is so damn cool... anywae... was just thinking if i type reallie long entries people wont bother reading esp if its all chucked together... haha... whatever man. maybe its better that way. then can have this quiz to see if people actually bother to read. haha. being spas. anywae... was reading jeanette's group and yeah. we changed geog group. im not reallie sure how i feel about it but yeah. don't think i reallie like it. i mean not that i don't like the people but. yeah. its just ... i have that intuition. yeah. i wish tomorrow would be a good day. maybe it would be. or maybe just okay. but yeah. i don't have that i want to go feeling and that everything will be reallie nice feeling and that im reallie looking forward to it feeling. i hate it. i have this i don't want to go feeling. which is why im here typing this instead of sleeping. alwayz have the i want to sleep feeling coz im tired but also i don't want to sleep feeling coz i dunno. i don't want the next dae to come? maybe. or maybe just want to stay up late. yeah. but know i'll regret it tmr when i cant wake up. damnit. why does time pass so fast when we're sleeping. so irritating. it nv passes so fast during chinese lessons. anywae... dunno since when or why. but nowadays when i see her. i feel funny. not crush her kinda funny. but just funny. it just feels reallie different. and i feel ... i dunno... yeah... sigh. oh.. i probably died for my conversation for english orals. whatever man. and apparently i type very fast. yeah right. sigh. was doing the math ws just now. wonder if i can finish it myself. sigh. did substitution for this problem and then cancelled it twice then did elimination and i found the damn answer. hai. and the other one could substitute back into one equation but not the other. sigh. and basically my maths just sucks. big time. hai. oh... and do you think being in the same class matters? yeah... i mean like you can be in the same class with someone for like ten years and not speak to them but yeah.. if you're like close to this other person and you aren't in the same class.. you usually drift apart coz you find other people in your class ... yeah... its reallie sad. but its reallie hard too. to stay together. yeah. and sometimes things reallie just refuse to go the way you want it to. like you plan everything out. but something has to go wrong. and then phoof! everything's just gone. its reallie sad. you just feel so disappointed. so deflated. yeah. reallie. and it hurts so much. realise im going off point and this doesnt relate to the top part at all but hey this is my blog. yeah. watever. oh. forgot to see what time i started. yeah.

090503 10:34pm

saturday

i don't want to try just to fail.
i don't want to get my hopes up just to get disappointed
i don't want to climb higher just to fall harder.
i don't want to open my heart just to have it broken.
i don't want to give just to be rejected.
i don't want to hold your hand just to feel you let go.

100503 5:08pm

saturday

isn't it strange how something that was so great can just fall from the sky?
isn't it weird how someone who's always so happy can now just want to die?
isn't it perculiar how people can just give up without even bothering to try?
isn't it funny how when seniors scold their juniors they are the ones who cry?

100503 5:40pm

saturday

okay... went to sch... had bl prac. played queens park, elisabeth, pocahantas, gr, slavic, paganini, swans lake. yeah... cant remember. anywae love pocahantas. and it was fun. playing song after song. even though it was messy and i got lost. but yeah. it was fun. and yeah. yesterdae when i was lying in bed, i suddenly had that i want tomorrow to come feeling. weird. first time. anywae. yeah. im trying to accept it. trying to loosen my grip. not to be so sensitive. but i cant. things have changed and its so obvious even my dad noticed. woah~ mayb its the fact that im clinging on so much that things changed. i dunno. today jasmine was quite... i dunno. was quite freaked out by her behaviour when she was tearing the newspaper. reallie. no idea why. hai. catching up on blogs now. anywae as i was saying... it feels different. it just does. and its so damn obvious. damnnit. if a true friend is suppose to accept you for who you are, then why is it that a true friend should also be willing to change for you? its a paradox. and yeah... sometimes you think you know people. but you don't. they may seem reallie joyful and all... but actually they are damn sensitive too. just that they're too nice to take it out on other people. and i guess after knowing more, listening to what other people said, or wrote, and what they said or wrote, it will definitely affect your opinion of them. no matter consciously or sub-consciously. yeah. i know im easily affected. is that good or bad? hai. anywae have lit hw which is so do not want to do. damnit. oh and yeah. jing's group won for public speaking. why am i not surprised. and eliza didn't come for band prac today. hope you get better kae and get rid of whatever 'sickness' you have now? think of her. haha. motivation. yeah. :P wished i had the courage to go and apologize to her. them. but yeah. hai.

when you're down and about
and you think no one seems to care
before you think you're unimportant
try thinking about what you do
when someone is down and about
do you care?
or do you go about with your life?
acting like you didn't see it?
didn't notice it?
no matter how unclose the person is to you
shouldn't you at least try?
but i guess its just the attitude we've developed
and the person wouldn't confide in you anywae
right?
its a sad unfeeling world we're living in

guess it kinda describes me but yeah. you wouldn't bother to comfort that person would you?

yeah.

100503 6:22pm

saturday

typed something but decided against it. why must this be public?!?!?! damn. i asked for it. so loser.

why?
why is it that people can be so different?
why cant we all be happy at the same time?
why must we be so greedy
as to want everything at the same time
when we know it isn't possible.
why?
why can we just be contented with what we have
instead of taking something away from someone else and spoiling everything for them
why?
why cant you see?
that she's the one spoiling everything for us
instead of abandoning me and going off with her.
why?
arghhh!!!!!! *wailsss*

okay so the ending was quite expected but yeah... whatever man.

100503 6:40pm

saturday

life is beautiful =)

100503 10:26pm

sunday

just have this tremenduous urge to blog.
nearly posted something just now earlier on. glad i didn't.
and yups.
life is still beautiful.
must learn to huo de xiao xiao sa sa then it will always be beautiful =)
yups.

110503 10:28pm

tuesday

The End of the World
Nina Gordon

Why does the sun go on shining
Why does the sea rush to shore
Don't they know it's the end of the world
'Cause you don't love me any more

Why do the birds go on singing
Why do the stars glow above
Don't they know it's the end of the world
It ended when I lost your love

I wake up in the morning and I wonder
Why everything's the same as it was
I can't understand
No, I can't understand
How life goes on the way it does

Why does my heart go on beating
Why do these eyes of mine cry
Don't they know it's the end of the world
It ended when you said goodbye

Why does my heart go on beating
Why do these eyes of mine cry
Don't they know it's the end of the world
It ended when you said goodbye

130503 10:48am

tuesday

having com studies now. hate the coms here. they kill my eyes and i hate the way my blog looks on these com. aniwae.

mayb its just our different point of view. maybe from your pov youre right. but i mean like. if you were going to her house in the first place. why ask if i wanted to go to yours. i mean like. i reallie wasnt planning to go there in the first place. like hello? i mean you din say anything at all. like. ... yeah. i mean like. you tell me then. and then assume that i can go. no wait. i must go. ... i mean like ... yeah. aniwae maybe it would have been better if i didn't. yeah. whatever man.

noticed i used repetitive. but out of point. yeah.

the time is so cool... hai~

130503 11:11am

friday

hmmm... let's see. what can i say? its wang lee hom's bdae tmr!!!. haha. nvm. that was crap. yeah. so went to Sungei Buloh today. Lalangs are green! :) oh and eyeballs, my sister said that her friend was looking for your book too. haha :) im hooked onto it but then again... im easily hooked onto books. basically was feeling sticky the whole day. so irritating. came home and bathed 'twice'. yeah. went to pizza hut. and somebody was blushing sooo much. i wonder why... haha. footdrills tmr, and science make-up lesson. hai. stupid mrs oh. haha. smartly forgot to bring my tie today. wow. go gek. go gek. handed up my eng and lit file. woohoo~ i rock. oh yeah. and we should do something for IRS. *hint hint* i should just go and read the book. yeah. oh and we were speaking biao zhun english and biao zhun hua yu. lolzZz... yeah man. yeah man. haha. oh and noelle best lah. tired then don't come to school? hai. LUCKYYY!!! oh yeah. and i was going to reach home by 9pm the lastest today. yeah man. sure man. haha. who stole the cargo from antonio lolzZz... oh... and i was reading the book in chinese class then the teacher suddenly patted me on the shoulder and called me then i was so damn freaked out. haha. and jas best. for the quiz thing everything put a and she got like what four correct? haha. damnnit. not fair man. oh yeah... math test todae? reallie died. hmmm... got geog test back though. was quite happie with my marks. probably coz its like one of the highest ive gotten for this whole year or smth. and my sister is still studying. gosh~ amazing man. haha. oh hmmm... and eliza reminded me... yeah... they were damn funny. and we thought they went home liaoz but actually they were outside asking some other people. lolzZz... hai. a;licje;oijc;ak haha. bored. can you tell? you should. unless you're so bored that your brain isn't functioning properly anymore. if you even have a brain that is. okay. nvm. ignore the above. i was just reallie BORED.

160503 11:04pm

saturday

listening to this reallie nice song now... and trying to type with one hand which is like reallie stupid and difficult thanks to SOME PEOPLE :P oh... and Shun Ling and Isabel took us today... hmmm... it was okay i guess... and the timpanis were terribly out of tune. *twinkle twinkle litte star* :) aniwae... had science MAKEUP lesson... haha. it was so stupid. obviously larh... its him what. yea. and the stupid experiment was so obviously stupid. there was like so little thing inside the tube thingy and like cant see at all kinda thing? oh n today there were two Indian Culture Society? people who literally chased us out of the band corr. and the taller one was so bloody irritating and her freaking attitude. yeah. urgh. and erm did filing today. finally understand why they say it takes ages. put the clips and found that i bought the wrong sizes. aniwae still need to do the sticker thing.

i shall stop blogging now... coz i abit cant think of stuff to say. so then EMMALINE THOR u should come online. yes.

170503 8:50pm

saturday

Tell Laura I Love Her
Ray Peterson

Laura and Tommy were lovers
He wanted to give her everything
Flowers
Presents
And most of all
A wedding ring

He saw a sign for a sport car race
A thousand dollar prize it read
He couldn’t get Laura on the phone
So to her mother Tommy said

Tell Laura I love her
Tell Laura I need her
Tell Laura I may be late
I have something to do
That cannot wait

He drove his car to the racing ground
He was the youngest driver there
The crowd roared as they started the race
From the track they drove at a deadly pace
No one knows what happened that day
How his car overturn in flames
As they pull him from the twisted wreck
With his dying breath they heard him say

Tell Laura I love her
Tell Laura I need her
Tell Laura not to cry
My love for her will never die

In the chapel Laura prayed
For her Tommy who passed away
It was just for Laura he lived and die
Alone in the chapel she can hear him cry

Tell Laura I love her
Tell Laura I need her
Tell Laura not to cry
My love for her will never die

170503 9:22pm

saturday

was going to post something but decided i wouldn't. yeah. shall write it down someday. uh huh. oh. and omg!!! the ending of eyeball's book. omg! i love the ending. its sooo nice :) ahhhhhh.... haha... :) read it people. yeah man. yeah man. ha.

170503 9:45pm

sunday

decided to post lyrics everytime i blog so then here goes...

Eternal Flame
Atomic Kitten

Close your eyes
Give me your hand
Darling
Do you feel my heart beating?
Do you understand?
Do you feel the same?
Or am I only dreaming?
Is this burning
An eternal flame

I believe
It's meant to be
Darling
I watch you when you're sleeping
You belong with me
Do you feel the same
Or am I only dreaming?
But is this burning (burning)
An eternal flame

Say my name
Sun shines through the rain
Of all life so lonely
Then come and ease the pain
I don't want to lose this feeling
Oh
(Oh oh) (x2)

Close your eyes
Give me your hand
Darling
(Ooh yeah yeah)
Do you feel my heart beating?
Do you understand?
Do you feel the same?
Or am I only dreaming?
Or is this burning?
An eternal flame (x3)

Close your eyes
Give me your hand
Darling
Do you feel my heart beating?
Do you understand?
Do you feel the same?
Or am I only dreaming? (fades away...)

hai... nothing much to update just that im online so... yeah. anywae... still havent finished reading MOV. but i abit know what's going to be tested coz of eliza... haha. :P aniwaez... feeling happie =) having lit test tmr... sigh... stupid. eleven chapters for chinese test!!! crayzie people. and crayzie is still nice :P so there. hmph. anywaez... i have nothing to write... oh yes... i shall go and do research for irs now. i shall. i shall. and some people should take the hint too. *stares pointingly* haha. j/k

180503 10:10pm

monday

not looking forward to tmr at all... aniwaez... lyrics for today...

Love Me
Collin Raye

I read a note my grandma wrote
Back in nineteen twenty-three
Grandpa kept it in his coat
And he showed it once to me
He said
Boy you might not understand
But a long long time ago
Grandma's daddy didn't like me none
But I loved your Grandma so

We had this crazy plan to meet
And run away together
Get married in the first town we came to
And live forever
But nailed to the tree where we were supposed to meet instead
I found this letter
And this is what it said

If you get there before I do
Don't give up on me
I'll meet you when my chores are through
I don't know how long I'll be
But I'm not gonna let you down
Darling wait and see
And between now and then
Till I see you again
I'll be loving you
Love me

I read those words just hours before
My Grandma passed away
In the doorway of a church
Where me and Grandpa stopped to pray
I know I'd never seen him cry
In all my fifteen years
But as he said these words to her
His eyes filled up with tears

If you get there before I do
Don't give up on me
I'll meet you when my chores are through
I don't know how long I'll be
But I'm not gonna let you down
Darling wait and see
And between now and then
Till I see you again
I'll be loving you
Love me

Between now and then
Till I see you again
I'll be loving you
Love me

first time i learnt about this song was in asthetics last year, during music. then i heard it on radio and took special attention because the teacher mentioned it. its was so touching and i fell in love with it. downloaded it but never reallie listened to it after i got so many songs but was dying to have the song before. guess you reallie don't treasure things you have.

and about today? im sorry but i just didn't want to go to their houses. and i don't fit in that group and i admit i don't particularly want to fit it that group. so then... yeah... but thanks for waiting aniwae =)

was just thinking... im quite fortunate as in... although i don't think im very close to my families... not that kind where i tell them my feelings... but close enough that we spend time together. and yeah... and i guess im quite thankful for that.

oh wellz... had my lit test today... don't think im going to fail but not going to score either. getting back math test tmr... quite certain im going to fail or if not just pass kinda thing. yeah. def. below average.

the above paragraph sounds so studious... haha... chinese test on thurs. and i don't want tmr to come. i hope they come!!! ahhh!!! *freakkk* aniwaez... found a website for irs last night and my com smartly decided to have a problem. sigh. attitude problem man. aniwae... found the website again. shall print it out or something. haha. so guai.

had cooking today... admit that i rather have siewch as a partner but hey... working with sam was fun too.

and i felt bad for neglecting her... sigh...

gosh~ im nuts! why am i paragraphing?!?!?!

190503 8:26pm

tuesday

strangely feel okay about later on now... maybe even looking forward to it? i dunno... yeah... is com studies and roy tan again.. which equals to slack man... and he teaching excel ... sigh... aniwaez... lyrics for today... even though i should blog now before i forget what i want to say... haha...

Graduation
Vitamin C

And so we talked all night about the rest of our lives
Where we're gonna be when we turn 25
I keep thinking times will never change
Keep on thinking things will always be the same
But when we leave this year we won't be coming back
No more hanging out cause we're on a different track
And if you got something that you need to say
You better say it right now cause you don't have another day

Cause we're moving on and we can't slow down
These memories are playing like a film without sound
And I keep thinking of that night in June
I didn't know much of love
But it came too soon

And there was me and you
And then we got real cool
Stay at home talking on the telephone with me
We'd get so excited
We'd get so scared
Laughing at our selves thinking life's not fair

And this is how it feels

As we go on
We remember
All the times we
Had together
And as our lives change
Come whatever
We will still be
Friends Forever

So if we get the big jobs
And we make the big money
When we look back now
Will our jokes still be funny?
Will we still remember everything we learned in school?
Still be trying to break every single rule
Will little brainy Bobby be the stockbroker man?
Can we ever find a job that won't interfere with a tan?
I keep I keep thinking that it's not goodbye
Keep on thinking it's a time to fly

And this is how it feels

As we go on
We remember
All the times we
Had together
And as our lives change
Come whatever
We will still be
Friends Forever

La, la, la, la
Yeah, yeah, yeah
La, la, la, la
We will still be friends forever

Will we think about tomorrow like we think about now?
Can we survive it out there?
Can we make it somehow?
I guess I thought that this would never end
And suddenly it's like we're women and men
Will the past be a shadow that will follow us 'round?
Will these memories fade when I leave this town
I keep, I keep thinking that it's not goodbye
Keep on thinking it's a time to fly

As we go on
We remember
All the times we
Had together
And as our lives change
Come whatever
We will still be
Friends Forever (x3)

yeah... and i think i like noelle's way of blogging... wish i could have a new air con and com like right now. yeah man. i wish. i should start typing in proper grammar to improve my sentence structure man.

Yes. So here I am, trying desperately to improve my range of vocabulary and sentence structure. Mr Roy Tan is droning on and on about Microsoft Excel and I wonder if it's so painstakingly obvious that I'm not listening. However, knowing him, he probably doesn't care. Having Science for the next block and I'm so looking forward to it. You can tell from the tone of my voice that I'm not being sarcastic at all and being perfectly sincere.

I was just wondering, in the show 'The Mask', someone said something about how everyone in the world is wearing a mask, which makes them acceptable to society. I guess it's true, and it's quite neccessary to put on a facque, to prevent getting hurt. However, if everyone doesn't wear a mask, there wouldn't be a need to do that. I guess it's just our way of life, that needs alot of time to be altered, but the sad thing is, no one is willing to put in the effort to start. Or it is just simply something in-born in all humans, to be deceiving. Although I'm not a Christian, but if God made us, why did he makes us like that? And I guess when you really think about it, appearances do matter. No matter what everyone says about 'I don't care about what you look like, it's what's inside that really matters to me'. They care. Appearance versus reality? You have to face reality. Appearances matter. Alot. That's how people are cheated of their feelings. Giving their everything to someone, who appears to love them, but when happens when they find out the truth. BOOM! Their whole world comes crashing down and they get heartbroken. Is it really worth it? But I guess, there will be someone out there, who is able to make you willing to do everything for them. If you meet someone who is willing to do anything for you, you're lucky. It's really very difficult to find someone like that, no matter how much she/he gives, it's still human nature to be selfish.

Oh. And I got back my Math test today. It's one of highest I've gotten this year, I think. I still made alot of mistakes. Anywae, I still feel like blogging, except that I have nothing on my mind now. I should update my diary. :)

200503 11:02am

tuesday

im nice and this shall be a reminder on how i should praise noelle. no time now... shall dedicate the next entry to her. haha. :)

200503 11:27am

wednesday

hello. =) that wasn't me.

aniwae i shall praise Noelle.

Noelle the almighty wonderful amazing girl. May she live on forever and ever in history and the hearts of people. Amen. God bless Noelle. and she's damn fair.

210503 3:45pm

saturday

today is sunday. so then im like living in yesterday. [dot dot dot.] oh and there was this guy outside the icecream place and he was damn cool. [yeah.] its very difficult to type like that. *stares* [ure typing with two hands what.] what what. :P [er. dotz.] sigh. [....] its supposed to be only three ... so there. :P [fine. ...] haha. im so great. i have split personality. [that means ure abnormal.] thought i was alwaez. *stares pointedly* [hmm. true.] some peopleeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee

240503 5:59pm

sunday

first of all... get well eliza n yi qing :) and yeah... wanted to update on wed. and thurs. but didn't get to... so then didn't want to after that coz that urge is gone. yeah. aniwae... haven't cried in a reallie long time. as in reallie cried. and i have no idea why i broke down on wed. and that. didn't help at all. but yeah... was going to do this negative list but then decided on doing a positive on too to cross both out. but now. when i actually decided to blog. i don't reallie remember and i guess the feeling's not reallie there animore. aniwae... yeo pei li will probably remember me for the rest of her life or something. argh. whatever man. what's her bloody problem. aniwae... cant seem to keep my arm straight during jalaning. hai.

Colors of the Wind
Vanessa Williams

You think you own whatever land you land on
The earth is just a dead thing you can claim
But I know every rock and tree and creature
Has a life
Has a spirit
Has a name

You think the only people who are people
Are the people who look and think like you
But if you walk the footsteps of a stranger
You'll learn things you never knew
You never knew

Have you ever heard the wolf cry to the blue corn moon
Or asked the grinning bobcat why he grinned?
Can you sing with all the voices of the mountain?
Can you paint with all the colors of the wind?
Can you paint with all the colors of the wind?

Come run the hidden pine trails of the forest
Come taste the sunsweet berries of the earth
Come roll in all the riches all around you
And for once never wonder what they're worth

The rainstorm and the river are my brothers
The heron and the otter are my friends
And we are all connected to each other
In a circle
In a loop that never ends

Have you ever heard the wolf cry to the blue corn moon
Or let the eagle tell you where he's been
Can you sing with all the voices of the mountain?
Can you paint with all the colors of the wind?
Can you paint with all the colors of the wind?

How high does the sycamore grow?
If you cut it down
And you'll never hear the wolf cry to the blue corn moon
For whether we are white or copperskinned
We need to sing with all the voices of the mountain
We need to paint with all the colors of the wind
You can own the earth and still
All you'll own is earth until
You can paint with all colors of the wind

things are getting back to normal. i hope. stay this wae. okay maybe not. there can still be some changes. but. yeah... :) sometimes just cant help comparing her to her. i mean i think she can tell and i feel bad for neglecting her but i have to gu lu dao ta de gan shou also so then. yeah. there are still many things i don't know about her. think she was crying. but yeah. hai. what eliza said is true. people don't give a damn whether you're upset. how sad is that. argh. I HOPE WHAT HE SAID WASN'T TRUE. argh. if he read it. i would just die. argh. bleah.

250503 12:15pm

monday

at school now... and basically just wanted to tell mable to cheer up kaez? jia you. you'll do better next time. :) go mable go. go mable go. :)

260503 3:07pm

monday

still at school... i think im crayzie.. fnished the buckle thing. had the lit thing today. noelle was good during rehearsals yesterday but she forgot her lines today. :P still good though.still love the last scene. stupid beard. things alwaez go wrong during the actual thing. finally done wit the hogfather. haven't read the book though. how sad. still love the sover. doing teh buckle thing no. or rather i finished liao. :):):) left yiqing and emm. haha :P. and apparently someone crushes JANE. lolzZz. JANE is my mother's name. lolzZz. i hope i don't ... later. sigh. im trying to not get so uptight and everything. but... yeah... things just happen. aniwae there's nothing to update. so then. bye.

260503 4:10pm

monday

Private Number
911 & Fann Wong

Since I've been gone
You've had your number changed
Ooh yeah
But my love for you girl
Still remains the same
Now I've been loving you
And you've been loving me
So long
Baby what's wrong

So I'm asking
Baby baby baby
Please let me have your number yeah
Baby baby baby
Please let me have your number ooh

I'm sorry you couldn't call me
When you were gone
Well I tried to call you
Baby haah haah baby
But other fellows kept on calling
While you are gone
Hmm yeah
So I had my number changed
But I'm not acting strange
Welcome home
Baby nothing's wrong

So I'm saying
Baby baby baby
You can have my private number
Baby baby baby
You can have my private number oh

Oooh
So if I called you
Will you be home
Oh I will be waiting
There by the phone
Now I know your number
Though it's been changed
Tell me now baby
Love still remains
I've been loving you
I've been loving you
You've been loving me
You've been loving me so long
Oh so long baby
Nothing's wrong

So I'm asking
Baby baby baby
You can have my private number
Baby baby baby
You've given me your private number

You know I want
You know I want
You know I need
You know I need
You baby

Baby baby baby baby

You know I want You know I want
You know I need
You know I need
You baby

Oooh...
You know I want
You know I need
You baby

260503 4:39pm

monday

have conflicting feelings about her. and that didn't help. i mean like she was the one one who actually said anything. okay so she did. but its like... its just different. and she didn't do anything. i mean like. i dunno. and i guess i don't like her. probably like i don't like her. as in i don't reallie know her but i just don't like her. for her its like i just hate people i don't reallie know taking my things without permission or worse not telling me. so damnit. as for her its like i don't know maybe coz its just she's too close to the truth? i dno't know. the whole room stinks of paint now. i chipped my nail. damn. and so what if this doesn't make any sense. its just for me. i probably won't know what this is all about in a few weeks or so or what. but what the heck. its to just ya. the paint smell is getting to me. stupid paint. like the onions. can you believe it? i actually yawned until i cried during asthetics. sigh. bored.

one hour later...

260503 5:39pm

tuesday

got a freaking headache due to the paint yesterday. thought i came down with fever. i wish man. com studs now. so stupid. i seriously dont give a damn about this. yeah. got dc. damn.

370503 11:17am

saturday

i hate the way she scrutinizes me. i just hate it. i feel like she can see everything im feeling and i hate it. it feels like she told her everything. and im like. wtf. stop talking behind my back. whatever man. im damn sick of all this. just want to go back to being normal. like a normal normal person. without all of this. oh yeah... and feel better guotong :)

i feel damn hypocritical. argh. aniwae... had sectionals. had one from each batch at first. haha. i just want the holidays to come. but so what if it does. i still won't be able to sleep in and slack. i feel so tired. on thurs? just felt like quitting. just leaving it. but i know i would just kill myself if i did. but one day. i might reallie just quit. on an impulse. and you people arent helping at all. especially her. maybe i should stop going there more often. yeah. i don't give a damn. i don't give a damn. i don't give a damn. maybe if i say that enough times. it'll come true.

wish i know what she was thinking.

310503 2:05pm