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Hollows
Happy Holloween Everyone! If you live at the University, I will be dressed in my slytherin Robes. Even though I messed up with their construction, they are done, and they are lovely. Too bad my costume isn't completely movie accurate.
But, it's the warmest costume... ever.
Hogsmeade!
This is my own todo list with an LJ group I'm in. :D
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WakingLife
Life has been this busy sort of non-urgency. I haven't really cared very much and know that things are in the bag. I have a quiz in Arab Cinema that I haven't studied for. I think I know enough of the material. And my friend who lives in the room next door, says his quizes are open notebook. Well. Do I really need to study for it? Since I take copious notes to begin with (that I never look at afterword--steel trap memory?)
I had a test in Soviet History. I think I did fairly well on it. Of course, I couldn't get to the library to read the text. And the Text I just got enough money to buy. Well, shit. If I ace it, then I'll just rest on my laurels for that one. Honors Lit, is easy. Although, it's nice getting a feel for fictional writting again. I've kinda missed it. And no, LARP/RP backgrounds do NOT count. Hell, I might participate in NaNoWriMo. Though, don't count on it.
The only thing that has me sort of worried, is Grad School Applications. I have my GRE set for Oct 22. I can't wait to get it over with. I have really one shot at it. Hopefully, it'll be good enough to get me in the door. I fucking hate standardized tests. They proove nothing other than how well you can think like them.
Personal Front. Started LARPing my Giovanni character. She'll be fun to play. Hopefully, she'll be a harbinger of personal hells for people. And maybe, she'll be able to take over the city. Maybe. Werewolf, is much fun. And not just because someone distracts me--good thing I'm a Ragabash. Just what I fucking need, a cute LARPer. Hey! I'm somewhat single, and what?
Speaking of. I had a chat with the pseudo-exboyfriend/boyfriend-thing tonight. Just around 20minutes or so on my mobile. Outside. In front of the Village Market. With all the rest of the hooliganry. Amazingly, I wasn't really bothered very much. Chatting with him is calming. Albeit, infuriating. He reminds me so much, how I should keep up with American Politics more--when Meirs' nomination came up. But, AmPol is so boring. You can't take over the world that way... (what did I say about delusions of grandur?)... The funny thing is that he's a Conservative Republican and I am a Moderate Democrat. It's amazing we don't/didn't get into that many heated discussions. Though, it's nice to have.
I do miss him though. Being a couple states away is sad. Vocal mannerisims are pretty weird on his end too. As if they are somewhat sad. Somewhat, happy. *shrug* I don't know. If I wanted to truely psychoanalyze someone, I would have been a psyc major. But, I just wish I could at least hug him. He...seems a bit lonely. I wish I had the time to call him more. Pheh.
Let's see. I love my single. Didn't I mention that before? I might get some cell-phone pictures up on here, but they probably won't do it justice. I do though need to clean it. Especially, if my parent's will end up here on Sunday--Parent's weekend. My last one. Wow. Time flies when you're having fun. And now I should go to bed. So I can start reading a Hypertext thing for Thursday, tomarrow morning.
Meme
I thought this was amusing enough to post here. I absolutely adore this woman.
OneWordAnswers
Can a person be lots of any one thing? Does it even make sense for this to happen? Does it challenge the populace when a person is a lot of two things? I wonder about this? How a person can fit so neatly into two seperate containers. Which, is exsactly what I am when it comes to certain things.
My social experiement went well. I love where I am, even though one house seems to hate me so *emo tear*. This is me not caring about such inane trvialities. I'll have to put up new links and update the links list soon (on the left). There are a few people who I don't necessarily read anymore that I should remove and there are new friends who are due some space on the left side of the blog. I will enjoy it imencely when they have joined the ranks. Trust me, the right side is a mess of code that I abhor trying to fix at times. Even though, it is as neat as it possibly can be.
The layout has finally been fixed. I do believe Pen is running HTAccess on the servers again. There was perhaps some problems with Hotlinking I wasn't privvy to. But, I fixed it by regging for a photobucket account. Not too much trouble. I hope you all enjoy it. I think I really enjoy this one. I really love the shot they did for the Yule Ball in the newest Harry Potter movie, and knew that I needed to do something with it--other than making an LJ icon.
Speaking of Housekeeping here on birds, I really really need to archive the entries. I have entries on the main page going all the way back to freaking Janurary. Gosh. Sooooo many entries. Good thing they are all text. It shouldn't hurt to look all the way back...
Anyway, I'll bring my life up to date sometime later. It's already almost Lunch time. Things like cute LARPers, plans for world domination, and more! Aren't you all excited?
Semicolinbackslash
Why in the hell am I writting an entry. Oh yes. I want to imortalize this year so far. Well this year is like being in a waiting room. I'm studing for my GRE and getting some of that done, I'm also trying to narrow down some schools and what I'm going to be studying. But academic wise, it's just busy work.
Pat has a girlfriend now, and I'm proud to say that it's my doing. He's very happy. This makes me happy, I like the girl. She has my approval :D.
I drink entirely too much coke. I have many 8FLOz cans floating around right now.
My rook is awesome. Pictures will come forthwidth.
I have an experiment running. Now, I like the HP series. And I've always been slightly torn on which house I'd be in. I've narrowed it to two of them. But, I feel I'm too much on either side. Right now, my application is being reviewed at sorting_elite at LJ. I can't wait to see how others will take it when I've answered truthfully and fully to people I don't know personally. Should be fun to see how people who don't know me should think I should go.
Lets see... I need to get some meeting times down for GLS. Clean the room and take a nap.
Then take over the WORLD! Muhahahah *cough*
Back
So, I'm back home from D.C. ASPA was of the awesomesauce. Once I got there anyway. I have lots of buisnesscards and people to contact. A few people wanted me to email them my paper and my work to them. So, a few things seem promicing. Even one of the profs who I cited a few times came up to my poster specifically to see me and recruit me for Arizona State U.
I'm happy, it was such a great time. I also got to see Patrick and his friend Mike. We headed over to 18th street and hung out at an Irish Bar. Later I discovered or rather, they showed me what Jumbo Slices are. Crazy fellows they are.
Also, Elliot showed up from VA to see me. That was also a lovely meeting. One where I"m pretty sure he wanted to say/do something but didn't. Oh well, it's not like I've got a full plate of stuff to do. Its funny how he asks what the chances of me going to GWU for grad are.
Who calls a house "shaply?" That's the question of the day. Still, that was a nice time.
I also got to see John Astin when I saw a satirical play on the current administration. He played Gomez in the television version of the Addam's family, he is Patty Duke's husbend and Shawn Astin (LOTR)'s father. He was awesome as George the first.
The hotel and the area were awesome. I took in some great panels and went to some great receptions. It was a fun time. Now, time to get caught up on work in the year I'm calling the year of the waiting room.
Quick
I think I'm addicted to this song by Tom McRae- A Day Like today. Go check my Last.fm profile.
Damn you Pontiac!
oh and happy birthday Lauren.
Quickie
Well, the layout still isn't working. I'm working on another as we speak but I'm not entirely sure I like it. I'm hedging on a few different color schemes. But, I don't like placements of some things. I may scrap and redo. Doesn't that make me feel...dandy.
My Robe is comming out well. Hopefully I don't/didn't screw up somewhere. But all the cuts are going well and I'm being slow and methodical. It's comming along. I'll have to beg/borrow/steal a black box pleated skirt and get some black stockings to have the majority of the costume done. I may buy a sweater or scarf. Not sure which though.
I underwent a personal war the other day. Long story short, Mom got a piece of mail she didn't like about a property that was recently sold. I pulled my strings out at the capital and walked over to the guy in charge of the Southend NRZ (Neighborhood Revitalization) and got them into it. I hear there was an artical in the paper and everything. In any case, it was stopped.
Guild Wars continues to do well. I'm still in IVEX... go me. For now. I need to finish off the caster classes and unlock other things. I got out a bunch of runes last night. I now have three lvl 20 ascended characters. And all three are running low on skill points. Gosh. I hate FoW and UW but I guess there's no use in trying to outrun them...
I should check the counter. People need to comment. I'm not getting any younger, and I don't really want to use my LJ. Oh well.
Stuff
Is the layout not working for anyone else? I'll have to poke my image server and check to see if that's working. It... should for all intents and puproses. I have to change the layout anyway. Although, looking at Trent is ... wonderful, I need a bit of a change. I finally got to getting some new brushes for PS7 and so I think I'll do some experiementation.
Mom went back and forth from the hospital, she should be otay.
GuildWars is going well I'm a recruit for IVEX (o.O) and so let us see how that goes. I'm actually pretty hopeful that my skills are on par.
I'm hungry. But, happy since I had a glazed dounut last night.
I still need to edit my paper. I'm just procrastinating but things just kinda popped up. I'm thinking next week inbetween capping skills and working on my robe for Halloween/GoF.
Oh well. This is just randomness. I think I'll check forums now.
Stuff
Sorry if I spoiled anything. Not many read this anyhow. But for those who do and haven't read Half-Blood Prince Sorry bout that.
I was picked for APSA! So next week I have to work on the paper and stuff. I have to cut my nails. Again. I need to also buy a suit ish thing to wear for the Poster Secession that I was in. Something to impress because god there are going to be some head honchos there.
More when I think of it.
SweetestPrice
SPOILER WARNING DO NOT READ TILL YOU'VE READ HBP OR LIKE SPOILERS. YOU HAVE BEEN WARNED.
This is a profile of one Severus Snape. It is written in an attempt to understand his past, much like the past of Voldemort to try and analyze what he might be doing in the final installment of Harry Potter. This version of the profile will be a loyal Snape leaner.
Severus Snape is perhaps one of the most mysterious of the characters in the Harry Potter series. He is as ambiguous as possible and has still not revealed his true intentions. In the newest installment the Half-Blood Prince we find out many things and are confronted with the murder of Dumbledore by his hand. It is now that I have found it necessary to write a profile of the enigmatic Severus Snape.
In Order of the Phoenix we find out perhaps the only tidbits on the home and young life of Severus Snape. It was neither happy nor cheerful. It was described as a man yelling at a cowering woman while teenage Snape was upstairs shooting down flies. This suggests that it was not an unordinary occurrence and frankly happened often. With the revelations in Half-Blood Prince we find something else new. Eileen Prince was the mother of Severus Snape. She was also the witch in the couple of Prince and Snape. Little is known about the relationship (pre-Severus) between the two of them.
It could be suggested that this Muggle Snape was poor. It could also be suggested that Prince herself came from a poor background. There are slight parallels between herself and Merope Gaunt. I would not be surprised if there was a love potion involved somewhere. Although, I have reason to believe that Snape and Prince were not as far in station as Merope and Riddle.
Of course, this would be completely uncouth for the husband, Tobias that she married. JK Rowling has drawn many parallels between Snape and Harry, as well as Snape and Voldemort himself. One of these parallels is the uncanny resemblance between Uncle Vernon and Tobias Snape. Finding out that not only his wife was a witch and that his only son was also a wizard and one of his wife’s lot, would be a huge blow for someone that believed that face was of the utmost. Although, they were poor as suggested, Tobias evidently cared about what others believed. However, instead of running like Riddle did he stayed in the household. He perhaps believed that leaving and being divorced would be a huge blow. On this point, I would not be surprised if Tobias Snape was a devout Protestant.
Tobias would then grow increasingly hateful. He perhaps, harbored these feelings well before Snape’s birth. It could also be suggested that it was not that far after their marriage that there was a birth to Severus in either 1959 or 1960. He would abuse Eileen; perhaps this was a redux of the abuse she may have suffered. She was described as not being attractive. Children being the way they are would have made fun of her. Her own home life might not have been chipper either. She would have gone into her own defensive maneuver, perhaps well-practiced at that, and cowered at the corner. Memories of her own abuse would perhaps be flying through her head. And yet she stayed with Tobias instead of using her own powers against him. She probably deluded herself into believing that he loved her and she loved him. This is a common delusion from abused women in these relationships.
Child psychologists all believe that this is what is called emotional abuse and neglect. Even from the tiny memory that we see in Order of the Phoenix is enough to diagnose the symptoms of it. According to Helpguide.org “emotional abuse can range from a simple verbal insult to an extreme form of punishment,” Tobias was certainly capable of either. Examples include “ignoring, yelling or screaming, belittling, confinement to a dark room or terrorizing and habitual scapegoat. (Helpguide.org)” Further, this can come from anyone; people such as parents, teachers, bullies, and middle and high-school girls in social cliques. For someone like Severus it would feel as though it was coming from all sides. There was no place for him to find solace. Emotional neglect “is a lack of emotional support and love” and this can result in “failure to attend to needs and domestic violence in the child’s presence” (Helpguide). These types of abuse tend to link with others. It is not impossible that in the Snape household physical abuse was also the word of the day. Physical Neglect and Abuse can come in the form of “inadequate provision of food, housing, or clothing appropriate and inadequate hygiene (Helpguide).” Surely the graying underwear would attest to it. He would have tried to kill things like flies that he knew he could have control over, as he had no control over himself at the time.
It could also be suggested that she was a parent who wanted the best for her son by perhaps teaching him the art of potion making. With this knowledge it could be suggested that she was excellent at potion making and would teach her son even before Hogwarts what it would be all about. She would have been pleased that he had picked up on it very quickly. He might have had a close bond with her. This is something that his father threw away. Of course, she may have been flighty and fearful. Severus might have wanted a way to protect his mother. Many instances of domestic abuse end with the child killing the father. Surely, Snape may have had these thoughts. Eileen may have restrained Severus so that he would not dirty his hands. This would not have kept him from learning everything he could about the Dark Arts to try and protect his mother from the awful Muggle he called his father.
Slowly, Severus’ disposition would have come to light, molded with the waters of abuse. He would have been outcast from the social circles of Hogwarts. Lucius would have taken the boy under his wing. And Snape feeling ashamed that his mother was being berated everyday by a muggle perhaps tried to call himself, pure-blood. And he would use the nickname “half-blood prince” for the sheer irony of his house life, only he would find it hilarious that a Prince would be living like a pauper. Lucious Malfoy would have been his first friend perhaps. His relationship with Lily Evans is not withstanding. Severus through his years of self-teaching himself the Dark Arts represented a nice tool for Malfoy to use.
At some point in the Hogwarts career Eileen Prince-Snape would have died. Perhaps she died as a result of an “accident” at home. Feeling as though he failed to protect his mother with the knowledge he accumulated, Severus would have gotten depressed. Perhaps he cried, which is where the name Snivellus comes from. Of course, this could have come earlier if the abuse continued at the hands of others in Hogwarts. At this point, I believe that Severus closed himself from all emotion. Lucious and the rest would have graduated and a few years later Severus would have as well and joined the Death Eaters. Ashamed for not saving his mother from the Muggle, and he would harbor an intense hatred of every muggle in existence. He would have also called himself a pure-blood wizard in the company of the other Death Eaters. In much the same way as the Voldemort rejected his half-blood ancestry so did Severus. Voldemort would have used the Severus to get a job at Hogwarts. Severus might not have had the same pull to Hogwarts as Voldemort did, but he did have something. It wasn’t his home on Spinner’s End a Muggle Ghetto in northern England. The Prophesy was half-way overheard and Snape ran to Voldemort to tell him. Perhaps, Voldemort offered the adoration of Lily Potter, someone he at least respected. Voldemort killed James and Lily Potter, and Severus feeling much like Judas at the time would have had guilt larger than anything before. He would have reexamined why he joined. And realized what he must do.
This is where I believe that he came clean to Dumbledore and Dumbledore knew that the Voldwar was not over. This is where the plan was put into action of Snape being a sort of double agent. The hatred for Harry is real from Snape. Although, I believe he sees James Potter when he does the things he does to Harry. I think, he believes James to be weak. Not being man enough to protect James. And in some ways I think Severus sees himself, not being able to save his own mother. But, the war needs to go on.
In more than one occasion Snape has saved Dumbledore and others. Even in the HBP we see this. Snape and Dumbledore could have formed a Father/Son bond. One of the only people Snape may have ever respected. I do not think that Snape wanted to kill Dumbledore and possibly wanted to die if Draco couldn’t do it. But, Dumbledore thought that this was silly. And Dumbledore ordered Snape at the forest to kill him if he must and not tell anyone else about it. This was what Dumbledore asked if he was prepared to do. To do anything that needed to be done to get to Lord Voldemort, even if it meant his death, even if it meant the revulsion of the entire Wizarding World. To kill the one person who gave you a home and a job and in some ways affection must have been very tough for Severus. Dumbledore like Harry represents the only father either of them would have known. The hate that would have been needed to get off the Avada Kedavra would not be hate for Dumbledore; although, this would be possible for Snape to hate Dumbledore for telling him to kill him. But it would be hate for Voldemort, for inadvertently making him kill the one father that he ever knew.
Snape is a deeply horrible person; he is suffering from the sins of the father. However, he as well as Dumbledore knows the game and how it is to be played. This is the biggest power play of them all. By solidifying his position within the death eaters, by giving up his position as a teacher (by finally getting the cursed DADA position) he has paid the sweetest price.
But, the three have many similarities. And the fat lady has not sung yet.
AlmostDone
Well, I passed in my paper The Politics of Exclusion: Alienation and Powerlessness among Latinos I'm happy with what I've done with it. Though, I wish I had done some things differently. As soon as I passed it in, I thought of something that I should have put with it. But, it's done, I'm tired, but content. I have finals on monday and tuesday a final banquet on weds and then I fly home thursday morning. I'll be sleeping as soon as I get home. With my dog that I miss.
I hope I get picked for APSA but, if I don't that's okay. I need one more vacation with some GRE preperation and then I'll be ready for senior year. wee. Hopefully, I get into the school of my choice. Yes.
PowerLaw
Damn Streight.
Duke2
Well, I’ve had this sitting in my head for a little while now. I’ve kind of wanted to get some things written down on, at least, the digital medium before letting my memory get hold of some of these thoughts.
North Carolina is well, southern. The Duke Campus is… massive. It’s frankly much more massive than I’m used to. It’s a big jump from being on a somewhat closed campus, to going to something a lot more sprawling. There are some good things though, they have a well furnished living room, a kitchen that’s actually open to the students who live here, a computer lab, and these nifty chairs that have a flat end so that you can lean back on them. There’s also WiFi everywhere you turn and there are name brand restaurants on campus.
No, I haven’t seen the gardens yet. No, I haven’t had the time to do so.
The teaching style is also something that I’ve never had to deal with before. I find myself learning more from the TAs than I do from the professors. I suppose, that’s what happens when the school has their professors do more research. The TAs are great very well informed, I only hope to be their caliber when I go through grad school. They’ve been incredibly helpful in helping me flesh out my longer and major research question. Let’s just hope I can pull through for them. I want to.
I think I’m settling on something for said research project, I want to examine the determinates of Latino partisanship. But, it’s still being tweaked to something that really hasn’t been done before. That’s something that Scott DiMarchi PhD said that I should be looking into for this project. That’s something I really want to do, I mean Latino Studies is something that’s barely touched upon back up north. To have the opportunity to do some scholarly research on the subject is frankly, exciting. I really want to get this question carved in stone so I can start research and do some preliminary writing. Not to say I don’t also want to kick ass down here just for scholarly purposes. I kind of want to be published present my paper to the APSA conference. How awesome would that be for me, or my school?
That’s another thing, a good chunk of the people here kind of disappoint me. A lot of them do not want to get phDs in Political Science. Frankly, a lot of them want to go to law school. Or get a dual JD MA in graduate school. Very few in this program actually want to get phDs. Hopefully, they will recognize that, and choose accordingly. That also doesn’t mean I can slack off. I’m going to work as hard as I can reading everything well-enough, taking as much notes and then brewing that over before I ask any of the questions I want to ask.
I also have to update my resume, there are some amazing schools coming just to meet us. And I need to be good for that.
Okay, more to come later. Oh and Happy Birthday Mr. Nick Mason.
DirtySouth
I should write an entry about the end of my junior year. All I'll say is that it finally ended. Stress went away, and I played a whole truck load of Guild Wars. I will miss some people, Marilu, Rya, Jordan, and Elliot; but, they'll get along I'm sure. I'll try and keep up with the lot of them.
I'm at Duke now for the month for a summer program. Very Pretty Campus, overtly in love with the security. It's like a Police State. Moisture Sensors in the Comp Lab... Card Key entries that'll alarm if you leave the door open too long... Bathrooms lock behind you so you must bring you're keys with you at all times... It's pretty crazy. It's also pretty hot here in North Carolina.
It makes me love my department, our way of doing things a lot more. It's a good time. The people are nice and it's nice enough, I just don't think I'll like it enough to come here for Graduate School. I think I'll go somewhere else.
More to come as I get bored.
LJquizzes
I refuse to really use teh LJ.... muhahah don't expect this to go anywhere.
THREE NAMES YOU GO BY:
THREE SCREEN NAMES YOU HAVE HAD:
THREE PHYSICAL THINGS YOU LIKE ABOUT YOURSELF:
THREE PHYSICAL THINGS YOU DON'T LIKE ABOUT YOURSELF:
THREE PARTS OF YOUR HERITAGE:
THREE THINGS THAT SCARE YOU:
THREE OF YOUR EVERYDAY ESSENTIALS:
THREE THINGS YOU ARE WEARING RIGHT NOW:
THREE OF YOUR FAVORITE BANDS OR MUSICAL ARTISTS:
THREE THINGS YOU WANT IN A RELATIONSHIP:
TWO TRUTHS AND A LIE:
THREE PHYSICAL THINGS ABOUT THE PREFERRED SEX(es) THAT APPEAL TO YOU:
THREE THINGS YOU WANT TO DO REALLY BADLY RIGHT NOW:
THREE CAREERS YOU'RE CONSIDERING/YOU'VE CONSIDERED:
THREE PLACES YOU WANT TO GO ON VACATION:
THREE KID'S NAMES YOU LIKE: (I'll list 3 boy and 3 girl names)
THREE THINGS YOU WANT TO DO BEFORE YOU DIE:
THREE WAYS THAT YOU ARE STEREOTYPICALLY A Boy:
THREE WAYS THAT YOU ARE STEREOTYPICALLY A CHICK:
THREE CELEB CRUSHES:
THREE PEOPLE THAT I WOULD LIKE TO SEE TAKE THIS QUIZ NOW:
uh..... probably shouldn't happen till I see people have seen this...
1. Dianna
2. Di
3. Eve (GW)
1. AngelofMoon
2. AngelnoMoon
3. WebAngel (this goes waaaaay back)
1. my awesome
2. my eyebrows
3. my cheekbones
1. my weight
2. my wrist
3. dry skin
1. thrifty
2. spanish
3. chankletas
1. indecision
2. lonliness
3. handbaskets and the hells they go into
1. music
2. my dog- Lola
3. my computer- Phobos
1. bluejeans
2. pj shirt
3. LiveStrong bracelet
1. Nine Inch Nails
2. UA
3. Tori Amos
1. support
2. companionship
3. stimulating discourse
1. I know Japanese.
2. Im Ghetto.
3. I play GW too much.
1. the way they talk
2. hands
3. that look they give
2. webdesign
3. photochopping
1. sleep
2. See NIN in concert
3. go off and see someone
1. Lawyer
2. political scientist
3. stockbroker (Waaay back in the day)
1. Japan
2. London
3. Tiblisi (Georgia)
1. Simon/ Eiden
2. Thomas / Alana
3. Malcolm/ Noel
1. publish a successful book
2. Make My Mark
3. Take Over the World (and not just the southern half)
1. I play lots of Video Games.
2. I do the RPG thing (tabletop).
3. I know computers.
1. I like dressing pretty
2. I like shiny things (Magpie!).
3. I like cute little romances.
1. Trent Reznor (happy 40th)(see top)
2. Hiroyuki Sanada
3. Adrien Brody
Alright
So, there are a lot of things I should talk about. But, I don't know if they'll come to me, so I don't think they'll get talked about. So, perhaps they were never so important in the first place.
The end of the semester is slowly approaching. This semester just was terrible. Time wise mostly and the fact that I had three difficult classes. It forced me to make some tough desisions on where I was going to spend most of my time. It sucked becasue some of the classes I should have gone through without problem with a normal amount of time to do things in, were more difficult because I spent a lot more time trying to get through three other classes that were inordinately difficult. It pissed me off to no end.
I'm going to Duke for a month this summer. Should be an awesome experience. I can't wait for that actually.
My senior year should be awesome. Wow... I'm a senior already. I'm educated and ready to take on the world... Or something like that. Oh well.
Doing a lot more of everything. I'll just be happy that I'll be done with this semester. Maybe things will indeed turn out alright.
LadiesAndGentlemen
Ladies and Gentlemen, I am a total loser. That is all.
ShakeShakeShakeMeSane
Awesome Show tonight, I can't believe she played Spring Haze. Will talk more about it on Plastic Halo, keep tuned.
Shiny
New Layout. Trent Reznor. From Kerrang! Magazine. Want With Teeth. Want tickets to a show this summer. Want to play Werewolf LARP.
That's all.
Belief
There have been a lot of pro-pope and anti-pope posts in the past few days after he died last Saturday. Some of the posts I've read, have had some merit. And I was wondering if I should write about it at all.
But, as your reading this, I suppose you've realized that I have decided to write about it. There's a lot this little agnostic can say. But I will say this. There was a lot of good that he did throughout the world. He was the first pope to say "I'm sorry" for the Inquisition, the lies, the inaction during the Holocaust and other things. The man said "I'm sorry" he was atoning for the sins of the Roman Catholic Church. Many should remember that he did, and in an organization, strike that, a bueracracy known as the church, well it's amazing that he even did that. He pardoned Gallileo which could sound trivial but who else would have done that. He extended a hand to other religions, other parts of the world and he visited them. It was a new age but he wasn't content to sit on his golden dais in the Vatican... he as well learnt many languages to facilitate his travels.
He wasn't without controversy though. He was against gays, divorse and other things that a great many of us consider "normal." He was a bastion of conservative thought and was unrelenting to the modern world his beliefs. He did not conform them to the reining thoughts of the day, and for this there were a lot of things that he and I did not get agree with.
His biggest thing, was that he stood by his morals. He stood by his belief. Belief is a hard thing to keep close. It's difficult to keep to the same beliefs in the face of new and different ideas that permeate society in the way that they do. But, Karol John Paul did, and keep hold to them he did, steadfastly. If anything, no matter who you are or what your doing, that deserves respect. Respect. It's not something you do with people who think the same way that you do, it's something you can give to anyone at the time. If you respect someone because you believe the same as them that's just simply agreeing. It's not the same.
Unlike friends who will like to say bad things about him, even in the face of all the good that he's done to the world, I will give him his just do. He tried his damnest to make the world a more peaceful place, including going to the United States to tell the President to not go to Iraq. This deserves something, it deserves respect.
This little Agnostic sends her blessing to the Vatican And wishes Karol a safe trip to the great unknown.
TitleHere
So I totally feel like a bum. I went to class today, but I only felt like I was half in it. I only had two classes today, so that was nice. I also locked myself out of my apartment... but, my third class was canceled so I went back home and delt with it. That was simple, and I scored myself a tuna sandwich out of the deal. Something tells me that I have to fix up my cabinet soon... clean it out of crap.
1 month and a half until this school year is done. Wow... just that long. And then on June... 6 I head down to Duke to begin the program that I was accepted to. This is pretty good, and I feel pretty nice about myself.
Cotillion is comming. Wait a sec, that word "cotillion" looks... weird. You'd think it'd look... prettier with maybe a Q or something... Oh well. I don't know if I'm going and I don't know if I'm going with someone else. I'd like to go, though it's always more fun with someone else on your arm. At least, I'd like to think so. I think I'll work on that while I'm zoning out in class.
My Palm rocks. I can read eBooks on it now. Saves me lots of paper since my profs give us PDFs... ALL the time.
The Werewolf LARP site is comming along quite nicely. All the info is comming in and will probably go live within the week. Now everyone could be connected. *heh heh* I kinda wish it was running this week. But, that'd be asking too much now wouldn't it. And besides, I'm completely distracted when I'm there... terrible for my RP skills. *grins* Just terrible.
I'm bored. Why the hell am I still up? I think I'm going to finish reading this chapter from Casino Moscow and head to bed.
Edit: Oh yeah, my Tori Amos ticket is sitting at home. It came in the mail today. RAWK! I'm going to meet my friend Lauren there, and we're going to do Merch Shopping. You know me, I have to buy the Tour shirt (didn't buy one for the APC concert... dont know why...) and a program. I should scan and use the old program from the Scarlet's Walk tour... Who else is going to the April 10th show?
Ruminating
First off, is that even a word-Ruminating? I suppose I could try to look it up, launch another tab and use dictionary .com but I'm lazy and I don't feel like it. Let's see... I have things due on Monday that I don't feel like doing. I'll probably get cracking on it tomarrow. Since, it's for Mitra I don't want to fall in the wrong side with the woman. She's just a terrible teacher and I get to see her everyday. Have I mentioned that? I'm a mayrtar for the educational cause.
I need to cut my nails down again, they are getting too long. And I don't like that in the least. I use a laptop for crying outloud.
Anyway, I have a picture of myself. I can feel the air flow away as I say this from my public... Anyway it's I love spring break. I love sleeping, I dont get to do it often. Yes, I will be in hell for Sloth. This is already known, but there's something about lying in bed with nothing to do, curled up with a book maybe. I'm pretty sure when I'm older it would be with someone special, but it's still nice.
It's snowing.
There's absolutely nothing else for me to do. Wow. Maybe I'll look for a movie on tv or watch fuse more... Or maybe I'll just putz around the net some more.
. One person thought my hair was actually streight. Nope, it's wavy. And when I want I can make it all curly like. It's good. I was 17 at the time, it's four years old
Whooo
So, I got through most of that week. I feel alright, but nothing was done probably to the best of what I felt. If I just had more time to do things, I thought, it would be better. OH well, we'll see how it all goes.
I was accepted to the RBInsitute at Duke University. I'm excited. I have to toss an acceptance email. Whoo. Can't wait.
So, I'm LARPing again. Jen dragged me to the CoS Larp. That was fun, but... always something with that game that puts me off... it's probably some of hte people.
I'm also playing Werewolf, up at Amherst. Much fun to be had there. *giggles*. There's also someone there that strikes my fancy. I think he's quite cute. That's all I'll say about that first. I only know his ingame name for crying out loud. How Fun! It's just weird because Isabelle is much like myself more than Ophelia ever was, so it's easier to fall out of game a bit more. She's that 40% of me that is serious, but sarcastic about the world. Opheila is/was more like myself in high-school a bit more serious.
the end of the year is fast approaching. Cotillion is comming, and lots of stuff should be happening. Everything is changing. My sister is going to be 16 and I'm going to be a senior in college. Im happy about my life so far, nothing to be really angry about. And what I am, I know it's not my fault.
Stuffage
So, this semester is going alright. I have this sinking feeling and difficult classes this semester. I have MacroEconomics (which I have an exam for tomarrow), Biology and Cultural Anthropology(exam on Friday)both of which I have with Prof. Mitra. So, I feel like I'm on that tredmill that I'm working so hard only to end up nowhere. It's going to be a difficult end to the week. I'm trudging through it, hopefully I do well on tomarrow and friday's exam. I'll have another exam next week the 17th, a midterm due after spring break, a term paper due at the same time, and prepearation for a big presentation in APP. Oh man, am I beat. This semester is kicking the living crap out of my ass. But, I'll keep on trucking. Not to mention work and clubs. Oh man...
Roleplaying finally picked up around here. I'm in a Mage game, a silly vampire: the requiem game (Shashenka Yurinova Dragonslava), Werewolf: LARP, and Jay's Crazy Ass LARP (yes it is, crazy) IM me for details if you want to know how much. My favorite has to be the Mage game becasue, well, it's Mage and I love Mage I've come to find out.
Though I reaaaaally want to get back into the OBWN goove. It pisses me off that I can't go becasue I can't drive. Makes me want to see about relearning how to drive and trying to get my liscence. I mean, I know how to drive but things always popped up and kept me from getting that mystical piece of plastic with the long island sound picture on it. I'll have to see about the parents and helping me pay for driving school or something, because it's getting rediculous. It sucks when you are an independent person and can't do what you want because you can't f'in drive. Arg. I downloaded the CT drivers book before getting my State ID, it's sitting on my harddrive as PDF but, I haven't cracked it open yet. I need pictures, because the test is a computer touch screen and you have to get the answer from the picture. BAH. I need to drive.
Got a letter in the mail from the school saying that I should apply for a few scholarships like Rhodes (yeah, right) and the Martin (UHA bootleg Rhodes Scholarship) I might go for it, I mean I need as much as I can get if I'm going to grad school...
This song "Hadou" (Ajico version) is amazing, go download it or sample it now.
The new picture cover for Harry Potter and the Half-Blood Prince is out. The pensieve is in it, wonder if Snape is going to play a bigger role, that would make me happy. Very Happy.
CDs are reaching critical mass, I need to reorder them.
Pepsi is good, I've always liked that shade of blue on the can.
TheGlory
I get to see Tori Amos in Concert, Sunday April 10, 2005 at the Bushnell! I'm so excited.
Anniverseries
So why in the hell do we as a people attribute such things with certain days? Why do people put such memories with certain days as well? It makes me wonder that people could hold such thoughts about a specific day, celebrate them as such even when that purpose is gone.
Today was one such day for me. It's been a year. It's been a year and half of that year was really spent in the dark about where things were going. And as I realized recently, that things were going nowhere, I think to myself why do I feel and think about the things that went by today? It's not as if anything truely ever happend. And it's not as if any sort of confession of feelings ever took place. It was just the start of something that has followed me for three consecutive semesters.
I wonder why things turned out this way. No, my stalemate is still up. I haven't spoken to him much since this semester started. And mind you it's taken much for me to not at least text him. I should though. I should at least visit. But knowing myself, I'm content to let things go without closure.
Oh well, I know not how this may still end. But there is a solice in remembering a day that to not many other people means anything to.
Randomosity
So, there are a few things that I wanted to get off my chest. The first is the fact that I can't stand LJ. I only stand it to keep track of those friends who do use the LJ and those who have things that I might be intrested in reading, but really LJ causes a lot more problems than it fixes. It's just too connected together, and somehow (although, I hear that Xanga is worse) it brings out the idiots in people who write in it. I use a personal blog. I love my pitas and if you want to find it you'll find it. Weither you'll keep up with it is your own goddamn buisness. My comments box is here. You have to put thought into what you write because of Haloscans 1000 word limit.
But, the one thing that burns me about LJ, is that they think this is the be all and end all of weblogs. Of all the ones I run none are on LJ and only one is there as an "extended edition" of this one. Yes, I am a blogosphere elitest. But then again, I think I'm entitled especially after learning CSS this past week with Wordpress. But, people don't look for the other side of the arguement. They see I have an lj with nothing really on it and they move on. *sigh* And as Machiavelli says you really have to get the "TRUTH" out first becasue this is what the sheep will believe and will hold onto this even when presented with another truth.
Which brings me to another point. A long long time ago in a gala- I mean Nov '03 I went to a LARP event with two former friends of mine. I had a great time they didn't. They hated it and would not really want to go back. I loved it and wanted to go back. We went to a few more LARPs and they still couldn't stand it even though I was building influence and loving it.
And then they were convinced to go to a different LARP within that place. This attention whore, who was a former friend, got there got attention and finally liked it. And then like the brat he is, steals toys from others. Including the one clan that was more or less assumed to be mine. Another thing he hated so much, even so much as feeling "dirty" for even talking to them.
And he still won't give me a book that I lent him a while ago. And I want it back. I'd love to go back to that game, I 'd love to ressurect that character and get back into the swing of things-- she was a number theorist who read the Kabbalah... I really wanted to somehow swing the Path of technomancy from them... but I don't know if that will ever happen.
I did miss the LARPing, I do miss some of the friends I did make. I don't make them fast because I don't put on false facade and pertend whatever to make someone like me. Gee... What a thought, I am myself. *sigh*
School has been going well. I mean there are two crappy classes that spoil what would be a good day but whatever they are required and I'll just have to suck it up and deal with it. But I can't help but ignore that sinking feeling that's come up on me over the past month ...
Nothing else in the Hartford front. Stay tuned.
PlasticHalo
Opened up new Music Blog using WordPress. Plastic Halo
Real post...soon.
Beginings
Or, the start of the new semester and unshakeable meloncoly.
I wonder if I can finish this in 15 minutes. You know, the start of the semester has come and gone. I'm in my second week of classes and I seem to be working myself really hard already. I've resloved (as I believe that semester should be treated like seperate school years and not the same one year together) that I would do my homework--at least the majority of it-- the day it is assigned. I also have the feeling that I could get a head of some classes since my teachers are assigning readings for the entire week not just one set for the next class.
One thing though that can't let me get too excited about this semester is Dr. Mitra. I've heard terrible things about her, and so far most of them are true. I have a survival guide and should I get through this semester of TWO classes with her (everyday), then I'll post it on the UofH LJ. Until then, wish me luck.
I do have a few really cool classes. The PoGo daily double (russian politics/public policy). They should be awesome, and I'm taking Russian Politics for fun. Yes thats right, I'm done with my degree requirements with public policy. I'm working on my base stuff for International Studies.
I have this unshakable feeling of meloncholy. Mom noticed it, since I'm usually hyper about comming here. And while I do like it here and can deal with the work, I just feel not connected like I used to. It's an odd feeling. The daily grind is the daily grind.
Pat came by last Friday. He's now at the UMD. We went to the Half Door and I had a beer. (whoo for being 21). As for the drinking thing, I'm not impressed so I'll probably only do it once every blue moon. Or special occasion. It's not all that special.
There are some people I have only seen for only 5-10 minutes total this entire semester so far. I'm waiting to see if they will call me, but that's feeling bleak. I feel like I might break down and call or call on them, but... I don't know. I don't think that would be the right move. It's just not meant for it. And, it is the last semester that I have to see them. Perhaps that is/was it the whole time, the fact that they would leave me behind here. Are they shielding themselves from something. Or is it that I'm just not the right kind of material for anyone... it's odd.
I finished a cusory design for ENA I'll probably code it, type content and get the network up again. It's high-time it does, the "comming soon" message doesn't make much sense to be there for upwards of 10 months. I mean, the Network isn't THAT hard to set up. Content heavy sites like Spring Fragrances, Shades of Gray, and the like will take longer. Because I have half a mind to redo half of it all. Perhaps edit my gistlation of Shin Shunkaden. Perhaps. It's high time that all happened again. I really didn't mean for the whole thing to be down for mths almost years at a time. Life just kind of hit me... and laziness. Don't forget the laziness...
Whoo 3 minutes to spare.
Disappearences
So I was gone from everywhere this weekend. And I shall tell you why. I was playing the Janurary Beta of GuildWars. It's an MMOG and is much fun to play. Much fun. So I played 48 hours over the weekend. Yeah... 48. I can't wait till this game comes out. Everyone should check it out.
I played a Mesmer/Monk this weekend, and the build worked out the way I wanted it to, it was an anti-mage build. Nice to see them kill themselves with thier own spells. So much fun.
Screenshots from Here
Birthdays
So here we are again, the beginning of a new year. And the beginning of my adult life. You know, you'd think this would come in with more of a bang, being 21. But, you know, there really isn't so much. I have to clean my room when I wake up tomarrow morning because people are comming over. Yay!
My parents won't be around tomarrow as they are working, and my sister will begin the second half of school tomarrow as well... And I will be alone in the house. Fun, I like being left alone.
I don't know why, but I think I've already written 2005 off.
Like the new layout? Wow. it's been more than three seasons since I've changed layouts. I did love the Casshern Layout, but it's gotten old. I will miss it. I read (because I was seriously bored) all 5 Harry Potter Books. Mind you we get them for free on release day and we haven't read them at all, until now. I read it because I love the Snape character. And while I still don't care much for the children, at least the adult characters are written quite nicely. Decent books them. So I knew I needed to do up a Snape layout.
Love the snape, and his wit. It's great, I read his scenes with delight. I'm so just like him at times....
this post has no point. wow.
Dianna A. Vazquez. 21. Into Politics, owns and loves way too much music, anime, and other assorted pop-culture goodies.
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