Thursday, February 12, 2004
MOCK EXAMS ARE OVER!!!

And this is what they have taught me:
1. Cramming 15 months of material for 6 subjects in 3 nights is not altogether a good thing.
2. If every single concept is not fully understood, the price may be high.
3. I will be so, so doomed when May rolls around.

So, in order of difficulty from least to greatest: French - English - Chem - History - Bio - Math. Darn you, Newton!! Why did you invent calculus to explain your messed-up physics?? Why?? I think I failed ;_; I expect at least 15/63 ;_; I stand properly humbled. It was funny watching Amine, though, cuz every couple of minutes he would leaf through the exam pages and either shake his head, laugh, or swear.

*winces*

It's finally sinking in that I will have to write these things in a few months. For real. But I realize now that the exams are do-able. I just have to put more effort into studying. In the meantime, a break would be nice (in other words, forget working on cardiovascular lab and History IA this weekend).

written at 07:19 p.m.

Saturday, January 31, 2004
Sammo is old~!! *^___^* HAPPY 18TH!!

Friday's TOK class was so fun! We finally got Eric and Anthony to sing ... since they wouldn't for our Socrates Cafe. We were told to act out a Shylock-Antonio passage from The Merchant of Venice. So Sam and I sat back as "directors" while Eric rapped Shylock's part (with Arash providing a beat) and Anthony singing Antonio's lines in opera! YAY xD and it fit so well! Anthony should sing more, even if it wasn't falsetto ... you're good!

World Lit word count -- roughly 900. Ugh, but they're not very satisfying words. Now I'm afraid I'll exceed the limit; yet progress remains painstakingly slow. MICHAEL, YOU STILL HAVEN'T EMAILED ME BIO SYLLABUS.

written at 05:45 p.m.

Tuesday, January 27, 2004
David took my grad photos to school! O_o WHY?? That's such an infuriating CRAZY thing to do. Luckily I don't actually know anyone at Dickens Elementary anymore. Except Brianna. And Josephina.

Darn it, I *do* know people.

We are going to Washington, DC in April! I finally get to be on a plane again! ^_^ And miss 3 days of school ... hrmm. Hopefully by the time April rolls around, most classes will be reviewing for May exams. I'll also be missing the Grad dinner-dance thing, but as Michael pointed out, it's no great loss. Wheee!!

written at 09:13 p.m.

Saturday, January 24, 2004
Last Saturday it was a wedding; today it was a memorial service. What's with this immensely annoying habit of my parents not telling me things?? Thursday: "They need a pianist. I volunteered you." (Okay, it wasn't quite like that. But close enough.) This morning: "By the way, they only have an organ."

I have never sat down at an organ in my life, and they expect me to play that monstrosity?? Did the best I could manage after a 5-minute crash course. You know the damper pedal on a piano? I can't live without it.

Last weekend's wedding was alright; nothing particularly special. Not one of those fiasco weddings that are so fun to watch. Lyd and I were hoping to see some old friends ... turns out we saw their parents instead xD

"Sarah! What grade are you in now?"
"Grade 12."
"Grade 9?"
"No, grade 12." -_-; haha.

So the words "busy" and "hectic" are beginning to take on new meaning. Last week was both, ESPECIALLY Wednesday. Chem class -- zipped through a lab quiz in 15 minutes, handed it in (hoping I made no silly errors) and rushed off to the fateful English Oral Commentary. Rambled a spiel about Shakespeare's Merchant of Venice (no idea how that went; I was hoping for an Atwood poem instead), entered History class just in time for a Russian Revolution pop quiz (GRRR for guessing Kamenev when the answer was Zinoviev). The bulk of lunch was spent skimming through Anthony's Socrates Cafe script (and I repeat: you were supposed to DELETE my snide comments!), which led into ToK.

This is such an unintelligible entry. When has a 4-day week lasted so long? Now, the weekends barely provide a breather before diving back into the blazing inferno of IB.

written at 07:30 p.m.

Saturday, January 10, 2004
It's really quite scary how much a brilliantly irate ToK teacher can influence us. According to the Enneagram test, I'm Type 9 -- the Peacemaker. And what does this mean? "Peacemakers are receptive, good-natured, and supportive. They seek union with others and the world around them."

How to Get Along With Me

If you want me to do something, how you ask is important. I especially don't like expectations or pressure. [I despise working under pressure. But did I mention that I accept bribes? xD]
I like to listen and to be of service, but don't take advantage of this.
Listen until I finish speaking, even though I meander a bit. [Because I don't always know what I'm saying. But don't blame me if I ramble to fill up the silence of an awkward conversation.]
Tell me when you like how I look. I'm not averse to flattery. [HA HA HA!]
Hug me, show physical affection. It opens me up to my feelings. [True, interestingly enough. I've never thought of it before.]
Laugh with me and share in my enjoyment of life. [Wheee~!!]

What I Like About Being a 9

Being able to relax and have a good time. [-_-; Give it a few months.]
Knowing that most people enjoy my company; I'm easy to be around.
My ability to see many different sides of an issue and to be a good mediator and facilitator.
My heightened awareness of sensations, aesthetics, and the here and now. [It's all about the string of moments.]

What's Hard About Being a 9

Being judged and misunderstood for being placid and/or indecisive. [I can be both. But doesn't it take us all forever to make up our minds? Our group needs a dictator!]
Being critical of myself for lacking initiative and discipline. [I've been berating my procrastination tendencies for a while now.]
Being too sensitive to criticism; taking every raised eyebrow and twitch of the mouth personally. [Yes to the former, no to the latter.]
Being confused about what I really want. [Ah!!x_X]

As I've mentioned before, being a Type 9 could mean any range of things. At best, peacemaker; at worst, phlegmatic. You could say either that I want everyone to be happy ... or that I'm too lazy to be aggressive.

written at 01:11 p.m.

Thursday, January 1, 2004
Wow. Can't help but feel that, after making my customary rounds, a summation entry is necessarily in order.

Yet I can't pretend to feel as deep and reflective as the rest of you. Because to me, 2003 is already blurring into the collective miasma of past years. That's not to say that things haven't happened, or changed.

Je suis d'accord avec Bobby -- our group has come far. I remember grade 10, with Cat, Sam, Mike, and me. Now we've expanded to become so great *^_^* and the epithetical "three girls" are outnumbered at nearly every outing we have! You guys are the best, we've had fun times together, and I count myself fortunate to have friends I can trust so well.

As for the summer of this year, I consider it a bridge between IB 11 and IB 12. Imaginative of me, no? It was lots of fun, but compared with the previous summer, in my mind the earlier one retains the upper hand. I doubt there's any logical reason for this ... maybe it felt more productive; maybe the thought of the impending school year didn't loom as much.

Quoi d'autre?

For me as well, Newcastle automagically carries a positive association. I was more genuinely happy on that trip than I'd ever been since Saturna. But the 3-day Bio "field study" fired off something I never meant to happen. It probably started before Newcastle, and even now I lack the nerve to figure out why I let it happen. It took me over a month to realize that too far was too far ... and that, well, a relationship was not what I wanted. Seriously, I blush to think of it now, because I didn't extricate myself very gracefully. Xiang ni dao qian, xi wan hai nen dan hao peng you. Anything further I'd rather keep off the blog and do it personally.

Argh, while I'm at this, I probably owe Mike an apology too. So yes ... sorry for making your life difficult. Part of it was my fault, I know. Hope it's all good now. Stay happy!

La la la. And on my part, I think this also marks the end, or what I sincerely hope to be the end, of a crush that lasted far too long. Phffft, crush, I hate that word. Can't think what else it could be though. It annoys me to no end how people throw the word "love" around.

I wonder who injected me with truth serum today? Catherine ended her New Year's entry eloquently with the words, "everything that has a beginning has an end." But, if I may add ... after every end is a new beginning.

written at 02:26 p.m.

Wednesday, December 31, 2003
We didn't really have a white Christmas, but a white New Year's is just as good! I made a snow kitty at Sunnyside Park, and David followed up with two snow mice. Admittedly, it was nothing like the lion masterpiece of grade 9, but tramping around in the snow is just so much fun!

Saw Return of the King on Monday at Silvercity Metropolis, with Cat and Iris. Although I haven't watched enough movies in general to judge a "good" from a "bad" one, I felt it was 12 dollars adequately spent. Bobby asked whether I found the ending rather long ... hrm. I see how it could seem drawn-out, but personally I enjoyed the denouement. I like the tranquil scenes best anyways -- the ones of Rivendell, Lothlorien, the Shire. The fighting, not so much.

And I do appreciate how, on the whole, the movies stay true to the books. If this hadn't been the case, I might be making more scathing remarks. As it is, Legolas' line, "A diversion!" was very ... disappointing. o_x;

Hrm. I don't usually have much to say about movies. The odd one does catch my interest, however. Like, I still want to watch Pirates of the Caribbean sometime! But I never cared much for the Matrix. Maybe because I've always much preferred fantasy over sci-fi ... although both the Matrix and Lord of the Rings contain aspects that are neither sci-fi nor fantasy. They're even inherently philosophical.

Ahh ... must start worrying about what grads have to worry about! The months ahead will be gruelling. It's like peering into a funnel without seeing the end. IB exams, provincial exams, then university ... but where, and doing what?

Why haven't I figured these things out yet?

written at 05:19 p.m.